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Thread: Touchiness

  1. #41
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    I'm not a 'huggy' person either. I never have been according to my mum. I've been desensitized by a couple of very 'huggy' friends but I don't think I'm ever going to be overly physically affectionate.

    I do hate being touched by strangers. I try to avoid it as much as possible. I used to work in a shop and being touched shouldn't have been that much of a problem, but some people seemed determined to grope my hand. When I would go to give people their change, I would hold it in my fingers waiting for them to put out their hand so I could place it on their palm. Some people took my hovering hand as a signal to wrench their change out of my fingers slithering their slimey fingers all over my hand. Ugh, seriously gross and annoying. Sometimes I visibly shuddered.

  2. #42
    half-nut member briochick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Southern Kross View Post
    I'm not a 'huggy' person either. I never have been according to my mum. I've been desensitized by a couple of very 'huggy' friends but I don't think I'm ever going to be overly physically affectionate.

    I do hate being touched by strangers. I try to avoid it as much as possible. I used to work in a shop and being touched shouldn't have been that much of a problem, but some people seemed determined to grope my hand. When I would go to give people their change, I would hold it in my fingers waiting for them to put out their hand so I could place it on their palm. Some people took my hovering hand as a signal to wrench their change out of my fingers slithering their slimey fingers all over my hand. Ugh, seriously gross and annoying. Sometimes I visibly shuddered.
    I dropped people's change for very similar reasons many a time.

    Quote Originally Posted by PinkPiranha View Post
    *pounces on Tallulah* SMOOCH SMOOCH SMOOCH!!!

    She brings up a good point about context. For example, if my ESFJ male friend was hugging me, it was natural for him to do so because he was a physical guy and gave hugs. Not creepy hugs. Just hugs. If another guy who wasn't a hugger came up and hugged me the way ESFJ friend hugged me? NO. Just NO. I used to like the way an ESFP friend of mine would just float up and drape an arm around my shoulders. It wasn't gropey or weird. He was so carefree and earthy, it just made sense with his personality.

    And I never complained when flirting/rough housing with my ENTP. He could get me in a body press and I wouldn't care AT ALL. That was being close to him, and he was careful with me, so I didn't mind.

    Girlfriends may hug me all they want if it helps them.
    See, yeah, couldn't quite, ever, do that. At least I don't think so.

    Quote Originally Posted by Skyward View Post
    You would HATE an ENTP I know, then. We're still trying to teach him a little thing called a 'Personal bubble.' So far I think rubbing him when he gets a tad irritating works. Thankfully a lot of his attention goes to ENFPs who have the energy to have the patience for his shenanigans. (But that's for a different thread)

    Did I post here already? Too lazy to check, but I follow a similar consensus. I prefer not to be touched unless I'm close to the person (I like to give surprise hugs, the look on their face can be priceless!)
    The ironic thing is, as much as I don't like being touched, sometimes the people who have gotten closest to me are the ones who completely ignored my discomfort and touch me anyway. One friend in particular used to hug and rub my back and touch my hair. If I didn't know she was strait I wouldn't have thought she was. Very very physically affectionate, with everyone, me included, and no amount of stiffness would stop her. Eventually I came to where I would kind of sneak to her when I needed snuggles or whatnot. So, dunno, maybe we can sense intentions.... and I'm going to stop that thought right there.
    -Brio

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  3. #43
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wyst View Post
    That's the kind of stuff that makes me cringe....
    Nah, Pinkie has pouncysmoochy privleges. She's coo'.

    Quote Originally Posted by briochick View Post
    The ironic thing is, as much as I don't like being touched, sometimes the people who have gotten closest to me are the ones who completely ignored my discomfort and touch me anyway. One friend in particular used to hug and rub my back and touch my hair. If I didn't know she was strait I wouldn't have thought she was. Very very physically affectionate, with everyone, me included, and no amount of stiffness would stop her. Eventually I came to where I would kind of sneak to her when I needed snuggles or whatnot. So, dunno, maybe we can sense intentions.... and I'm going to stop that thought right there.
    Intention has everything to do with it, really. I will say that I adore having my shoulders/back rubbed or my hair played with, as long as I don't sense any skeevy intentions behind it.
    Something Witty

  4. #44
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tiltyred View Post
    I took a 10 week massage course with three other people, total strangers to me, and we paired up 2 and 2 to work on each other, completely nekkid under the sheet on the table. I didn't pursue it as a career because of my own bad back, but I was happy for a stranger to come in off the street, have a shower, and lie down for a massage (non-sexual, I'm talking professional body work here...). What about in that context?
    Thats why I would like to make love to several woman, cause the one you love, ultimatively wants to take a massage course
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  5. #45
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Kross -- being groped is NEVER cool. There's a reason why you don't like it. It's an invasion of even the most basic rules of personal space. As a mechanic, I had to deal with such garbage on occasion, when someone was stupid enough to actually grab me. At one point, some guy had grabbed me in a, shall we say, very suggestive hold and wouldn't let me go. I was furious, warned him twice, he paid no attention, so I slapped him.

    That was the end of it.

    I hate it when people push me to lengths that I loathe. Like slapping someone.

    It's like Leelu in "The Fifth Element" - never without my consent.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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    Researcher: VDI-P
    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

  6. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by Southern Kross View Post
    When I would go to give people their change, I would hold it in my fingers waiting for them to put out their hand so I could place it on their palm. Some people took my hovering hand as a signal to wrench their change out of my fingers slithering their slimey fingers all over my hand. Ugh, seriously gross and annoying. Sometimes I visibly shuddered.

    I can so relate to this on the opposite end. Sometimes when someone holds there hand out I feel like I may have touched there hand to much just trying to make sure they dont drop the change.

  7. #47
    half-nut member briochick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PinkPiranha View Post

    It's like Leelu in "The Fifth Element" - never without my consent.
    I love that movie.
    On a funny note, my infj friend noted tonight that I stiffen up sometimes when people hug me. bah, I thought I was better at hiding it.
    -Brio

    "I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life; I have envied a great many people who led difficult lives and led them well."
    -Teddy Roosevelt
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  8. #48
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peguy View Post
    I hate being touched.



    A lot.
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  9. #49
    lurking.... Wyst's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by briochick View Post
    I love that movie.
    On a funny note, my infj friend noted tonight that I stiffen up sometimes when people hug me. bah, I thought I was better at hiding it.
    There's this girl that likes to give me hugs.
    The other day she told me it was because she likes to see me get all awkward.

    I felt taken advantage of...

  10. #50
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Nah, I still stiffen up when people hug me too, and I've had years of track time with an ESFP best friend, and of course, an ENFP sister. I used to be accused (and I do say resentfully accused) of not being cuddly (not by them), but I was like that as a small child. Why would it be expected that I won't be that way? I used to beat myself up about that, like there was something wrong with me.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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    AIS Holland code
    Researcher: VDI-P
    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

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