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  1. #31
    Filthy Apes! Kalach's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Udog View Post
    Can you explain this a bit more?

    If she says, I said it to test the ENTJs boundaries (and jangle some INFPs into showing something), then yes, she can explain it more.


    Quote Originally Posted by whimsical View Post
    how can i spot an entj?
    Look for someone in charge who speaks bluntly and seems to have no inhibition about saying personal things that would embarrass normal people but who gets quizzical and puzzled if there is some mention of feeling. Like they have some unbalancing secret.

    And that's why INFPs and ENTJs go well together. Or that's why people who focus on understanding and growing personal feeling go well with people who focus on more or less anything else so long as it's outside of them and tangible.

    I worry about ENTJs. They're like walking wounded. And I can usually do nothing about it.



    That's weird coming from me, I know. I don't like always being the ENTJ's saboteur.

  2. #32
    Senior Member Jeremy's Avatar
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    Again, with all relationship topics that try to say that one type is good for another..

    They're not valid. Typology is a very poor indicator of success when it comes to a relationship, because anyone can be compatible with anyone of any type. All you can see is a very, very vague outline of the surface personality with the MBTI - the intimate, relationship personality is very different from someone's type code. Typology can't work as a good barometer for topics like this, especially considering how much variation that there is between people of the same type in terms of their outside personality.

    I'm glad that your relationship is working well, but you can't take one good one and apply it to all situations, or like the others said, you may end up confirming your own hypothesis. Not that that's a bad thing
    "Can you set me free from this dark inner world? Save me now, last beats in the soul.."

    Fonewearl and proud of it!

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  3. #33
    Magical BlackCat's Avatar
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    How to spot an ENTJ- Possibly intimidating, has a powerful presence, very up front, open minded and open for suggestions (when they get to know you).

    There is other stuff but I can't really think about it right now.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  4. #34
    Filthy Apes! Kalach's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jeremy View Post
    Again, with all relationship topics that try to say that one type is good for another..

    They're not valid. Typology is a very poor indicator of success when it comes to a relationship, because anyone can be compatible with anyone of any type. All you can see is a very, very vague outline of the surface personality with the MBTI - the intimate, relationship personality is very different from someone's type code. Typology can't work as a good barometer for topics like this, especially considering how much variation that there is between people of the same type in terms of their outside personality.
    Sez you. Typology, in my humble opinion, says something about communication style. INFP and ENTJ have communication styles that quickly and easily get to what's important in one another. Whether or not that is actually used to communicate is another matter.


    And Lord, the sheer number of times I've witnessed people with partially or completely incompatible communication styles trying to communicate... If the basic compatibility isn't there, lots of other hurdles are, which is not to say success is impossible.

  5. #35
    Senior Member Jeremy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kalach View Post
    Sez you. Typology, in my humble opinion, says something about communication style. INFP and ENTJ have communication styles that quickly and easily get to what's important in one another. Whether or not that is actually used to communicate is another matter.
    I agree that Typology can be used to help forge a relationship by understanding how to communicate with your SO, and understanding how their mind works BEFORE you get to know them intimately. However, I don't think it's accurate to say that certain "types" are good for one another, especially when you get to the point where you begin excluding people (either consciously or unconsciously) because of their type.

    Many people on the forums often ask "Can a relationship between XXXX type and XXXX type work?!" and so many people will say "No!" or "It will be hard!!!!" My counterargument is that any relationship is hard, and while typology may help you understand your SO's communication better, it's not going to give you an accurate view of how your relationship is going to turn out. I've seen people get scared that their relationship is going to go badly just because of the advice people on here give based solely on their experience with ONE person that is a certain type.

    That doesn't even get into the problem that comes when people type someone else THEN tries to use that information to forge a relationship. It's impossible to accurately type another, at least IMHO, and to do so and then try to base any conclusions off of it leads to nothing but heartache. Typology is not a science, not in the very least, and yet people constantly overstate its value in making life decisions.

    Typology is not a good way to find an "ideal" relationship, because an ideal relationship comes from multiple things. You can't trap that in a 4 letter code that is ultimately *extremely* vague. The MBTI is a very useful tool to help you understand yourself and others, but I personally believe that using it like this is taking something that is meant to be spread over a cupcake and trying to frost a whole sheet cake with it.
    "Can you set me free from this dark inner world? Save me now, last beats in the soul.."

    Fonewearl and proud of it!

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  6. #36
    Filthy Apes! Kalach's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jeremy View Post
    I agree that Typology can be used to help forge a relationship by understanding how to communicate with your SO, and understanding how their mind works BEFORE you get to know them intimately. However, I don't think it's accurate to say that certain "types" are good for one another, especially when you get to the point where you begin excluding people (either consciously or unconsciously) because of their type.
    Being as I'm about as flexible as... something not very flexible, I tend to think I have just the one communication style, and more importantly, just the one set of built in conditions for what does and does not count as satisfaction. To fall back on MBTI shorthand, I wouldn't be INTJ if I didn't believe in perfectability largely of my own design but with other's input crucially involved. The combination--my design, their input, so the synthesis of the two--makes it kinda unlikely that satisfaction is immediate with someone who can't join in in a way I can immediately work with. It's stressful and distressing in prospect, and lonely most of the time, and probably in fact never satisfied. And it's very J. So I welcome all a y'all P types to conform to your type and thereby keep believing that no one can conform to your type. That flexibility lets me get away with being, pardon the expression, rigid, but not ultimately alone.

  7. #37
    Freshman Member simulatedworld's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kalach View Post
    Sez you. Typology, in my humble opinion, says something about communication style. INFP and ENTJ have communication styles that quickly and easily get to what's important in one another. Whether or not that is actually used to communicate is another matter.


    And Lord, the sheer number of times I've witnessed people with partially or completely incompatible communication styles trying to communicate... If the basic compatibility isn't there, lots of other hurdles are, which is not to say success is impossible.
    Your long post is a really interesting summation of the Ni+Te perspective on this: you don't care about purely objective correctness because trying to be truly objective is impractical. I appreciate that, but Ne+Ti still wants to try and explore every seemingly useless possibility just to get as close to true objectivity as possible.

    And I don't think ENTJ and INFP get along often enough to really show any sort of pattern of relationship quality--this is why I find socionics and other relationship-quality-prediction systems to be pretty specious. Opposite dominant function relationships (like this one, Te vs. Fi) can cause a lot more problems than they solve. Lots of supposedly good matches fail and lots of seemingly bad ones work beautifully--there simply isn't any significant pattern, no matter what compatibility patterns Ni arbitrarily designates as implications of the type descriptions you've read.

    Ni is overconfident in itself, and it makes NJs sloppy because they trust their own intuitive perspective on things without external evidence just a little too much. I know Te says that's missing the point, but I stand by it.
    If you could be anything you want, I bet you'd be disappointed--am I right?

  8. #38
    Filthy Apes! Kalach's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by simulatedworld View Post
    Ni is overconfident in itself, and it makes NJs sloppy because they trust their own intuitive perspective on things without external evidence just a little too much.
    That sounds right.

    But we have a back-up system. Ni/Te for the sloppy conclusions, aka a chosen direction, and then our very own in-the-moment, J-less, "See what happens" jigger: Se.

    Were the Se and the Ni/Te systems equally resourced, we'd be the complete, world-owning cyborgs.



    Ah, if I only had a heart.

  9. #39
    Phoenix Incarnate Sentura's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kalach View Post
    I worry about ENTJs. They're like walking wounded. And I can usually do nothing about it.
    i have an ENTJ friend with a pretty turbulent past. i sometimes try to ask her, but for the life of her she can't/doesn't want to "let it out". it seems like she has no regard whatsoever for feeling because she can't understand it properly - even her own. i don't usually worry about people, but i reckon she'll have a breakdown soon if it isn't let out.
    i hunt INXPs for bounty
    FUNCTION ORDER FOR THOSE THAT CANNOT UNDERSTAND WHAT ENXP MEANS: Ne > Ni > Fi=Ti > *

    ...people tell me i have wildfires in my eyes

  10. #40
    Senior Member Nonsensical's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Harlow_Jem View Post
    I am definitely not doing that. My boyfriend is more feminine/passive than the average football-mongering, protein-shake-gobbling meathead but is still very masculine. What I was trying to say is that he's masculine enough to me but the fact that he is still easily affected by his feelings makes him feel sometimes like he isn't masculine enough to himself. But that's just him; he's probably that way because his mother is a crazy bitch who fucks with his head... maybe other INFP males have come to terms with themselves.
    Alright, then I apologize for falsely accusing you.
    Is it that by its indefiniteness it shadows forth the heartless voids and immensities of the universe, and thus stabs us from behind with the thought of annihilation, when beholding the white depths of the milky way?

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