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  1. #81
    is an ambi-turner BRMC117's Avatar
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    the person that I have been going out with for 3 years is a ESTP, (I am a INFP) and it works out amazingly. I understand him, and he understands me.

  2. #82
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    Caveat: I'm sure it can work. It could work out great. I think as the INFP you have to be forthcoming though and be a match the ESTP's bluntness.

    Otherwise, no. I think in terms of the POV of an INFP, you have to be at good point of maturity (of your functions and overall). Otherwise, INFPs can be way too sensitive and unprepared to communicate and deal effectively with an ESTP who may be very blunt. The fact you two are strong where the other is weak can be a great attraction factor (I think an INFP can be admiring of the ESTP's social ease and confidence and devil-may-care attitude) but it's also the source of tension, stress, and aggravation.

    I'm super biased on this question because an INFP I dated had a 2+ year tumultuous relationship with an ESTP and I think it was one of the most dysfunctional riztarded things I've heard of. And I loathe both of them.
    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux

    Johari/Nohari

  3. #83
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    (IV) Sweet Irony....

    Have you ever looked at "intertype relations?" It's part of Socionics, which has some quirks as I understand it, as it is not totally equivalent to MBTI, BUT in most cases it is DAMN CLOSE. Anyway, they guessed how each type will get along...

    Consider this.

    ESTp/INFj: (Me and my wife)
    "Conflicting Relations" Apparently, the "worst ever"...

    These are relations of constantly developing conflict. Conflicting relations have the worst compatibility between partners among all other relations. However, it does not seem to be so obvious, especially...

    This is bullshit and I'll tell you why in a minute...

    Conflicting relations between psychological ("personality") types

    VERSUS...

    ESTp/INFp:
    "Relations of Duality" Apparently, the "BEST EVER"!!!

    These relations are the most favourable and comfortable of all intertype relations providing complete psychological compatibility. Dual partners are like two halves of a whole unit. They usually understand...

    Relations of Duality between psychological ("personality") types

    So, WHAT am I trying to prove with this little exercise? Simple. According to some, the only difference between MBTI and Socionics, is that if you switch the fourth function (for introverts only), then the two are equal.

    So, allegedly, an INFJ in MBTI is an INFp in Socionics...

    Now, didn't we just see up top that:

    (1) ESTP/INFJ = Impossible, and ESTP/INFP = Best ever possible, according to Socionics???

    AND

    (2) If the "switch the fourth function rule" is valid, then one pairing is marital bliss, and the other is hell. BUT - here I am getting along splendidly with my wife. Did we have some rough times? Hell yes. But I do not attribute them exclusively to our MBTI functions or types, as doing so would be proposterous and stupid.

    WHAT'S MY POINT?

    There is a WHOLE LOT MORE to people and to marriage than MBTI or Socionics or Enneagram. What is of imperative importance is that each partner is cognizant of their particular types, functions, and potential issues + strategies to mitigate them, and to simply see them as tools to ASSIST THEM in building the marriage/relationship both want and need.

    ABCD +/- WXYZ is good or bad = HOGWASH

    What matters is the love and maturity of the two people involved with each other, period.

    Halla has spoken.
    --------------------
    Type Stats:
    MBTI -> (E) 77.14% | (i) 22.86% ; (S) 60% | (n) 40% ; (T) 72.22% | (f) 27.78% ; (P) 51.43% | (j) 48.57%
    BIG 5 -> Extroversion 77% ; Accommodation 60% ; Orderliness 62% ; Emotional Stability 64% ; Open Mindedness 74%

    Quotes:
    "If somebody asks your MBTI type on a first date, run". -Donna Cecilia
    "Enneagram is psychological underpinnings. Cognitive Functions are mental reasoning and perceptional processes. -Sanjuro

  4. #84
    Lay the coin on my tongue SilkRoad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post

    ...

    (1) ESTP/INFJ = Impossible, and ESTP/INFP = Best ever possible, according to Socionics???

    ...

    What matters is the love and maturity of the two people involved with each other, period.
    Good points, especially the latter. And, I'm not sure INFJ and INFP are so frightfully different, so it seems like a silly argument.

    (I haven't looked much into socionics...it seems a bit too flaky.)
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    I DOORSLAMMING

  5. #85
    Not Your Therapist Sinmara's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post
    What matters is the love and maturity of the two people involved with each other, period.
    No no, you have it all wrong. What matters is that they're rich. I really love that quality in a person.

  6. #86
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pettycure View Post
    No no, you have it all wrong. What matters is that they're rich. I really love that quality in a person.
    Shit! You're right! My bad!
    --------------------
    Type Stats:
    MBTI -> (E) 77.14% | (i) 22.86% ; (S) 60% | (n) 40% ; (T) 72.22% | (f) 27.78% ; (P) 51.43% | (j) 48.57%
    BIG 5 -> Extroversion 77% ; Accommodation 60% ; Orderliness 62% ; Emotional Stability 64% ; Open Mindedness 74%

    Quotes:
    "If somebody asks your MBTI type on a first date, run". -Donna Cecilia
    "Enneagram is psychological underpinnings. Cognitive Functions are mental reasoning and perceptional processes. -Sanjuro

  7. #87
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    As my ex-husband is an ISTP, this may not be germaine to the question of ESTP. But, when we first met there was much to love about him (and there is still much to love about him). He is loyal and dependable, traits which I admire, and fiercely independent and funny. But, what killed it for us was what is mentioned above: I was constantly butting heads with him, so there was a persistent source of irritation for me. Living in an atmosphere of mostly constant irritation finally became intolerable. He also enjoys arguing about (to me) uninteresting things just for the sake of argument. He really didn't care about these things but just wanted to jolt my chain. This is 180 degrees from my temperment, which is to have peace, reduce conflict, resolve issues, and move on. I hate debating issues simply for the sake of debating. But, I can see how an ST mate would enjoy this.

  8. #88
    Senior Member Space_Oddity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post
    ESTp/INFj: (Me and my wife)
    "Conflicting Relations" Apparently, the "worst ever"...
    Um, I don't know much about Socionics, but from the information on this forum I gathered that Socionics INFj is in fact MBTI INFP... If Socionics ESTp is still an MBTI ESTP, which I'm not sure about, that would make it the same kind of duality as INFJ/ESTP in MBTI, which is considered the best pairing by many.

    Personally, I've observed that the anima/animus often really attract each other and sometimes can work very well together (just like you and your wife), but sometimes the relationship ends up being extremely challenging. However, I'd say that neither is actually the result of MBTI.

    As for INFP/ESTP... I really like ESTP guys as friends; they're probably the closest to my archetypal image of a "brother". It's fun, it's natural, but there's no romantic attraction. I cannot imagine going out with any ESTP I've met so far, because ultimately I look for a potential soul-mate or mind-mate in a relationship, and I haven't had this connection with them.
    Her head hung down
    Gazed at earth, finally keen,
    As the rabbit at the stoat,
    Till the earth was sky,
    Sky that was green,
    And brown clouds passed
    Like chestnut leaves along the ground.

    - SUSAN ANN AND IMMORTALITY, T. E. Hulme

  9. #89
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Space_Oddity View Post
    Um, I don't know much about Socionics, but from the information on this forum I gathered that Socionics INFj is in fact MBTI INFP... If Socionics ESTp is still an MBTI ESTP, which I'm not sure about, that would make it the same kind of duality as INFJ/ESTP in MBTI, which is considered the best pairing by many.
    Hey there. There is no way that you or I could put shackles around MBTI/Socionics type equivalence. Read this thread if you want your mind to get wanked out about the topic:

    http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...tml#post754920

    I stated what I did above to point out that there is alot more to love than MBTI or Socionics type compatibility could ever hope to predict, not to get mired in typological atomic composition. Not hatin', just sayin.

    Quote Originally Posted by Space_Oddity View Post
    Personally, I've observed that the anima/animus often really attract each other and sometimes can work very well together (just like you and your wife), but sometimes the relationship ends up being extremely challenging. However, I'd say that neither is actually the result of MBTI.
    My hairstylist says: "Opposites attract, and then they attack!"

    Quote Originally Posted by Space_Oddity View Post
    As for INFP/ESTP... I really like ESTP guys as friends; they're probably the closest to my archetypal image of a "brother". It's fun, it's natural, but there's no romantic attraction. I cannot imagine going out with any ESTP I've met so far, because ultimately I look for a potential soul-mate or mind-mate in a relationship, and I haven't had this connection with them.
    That doesn't mean one isn't out there...

    Live your life, don't let MBTI or any other system of self discovery decide it for you.

    Cheers,

    -Halla
    --------------------
    Type Stats:
    MBTI -> (E) 77.14% | (i) 22.86% ; (S) 60% | (n) 40% ; (T) 72.22% | (f) 27.78% ; (P) 51.43% | (j) 48.57%
    BIG 5 -> Extroversion 77% ; Accommodation 60% ; Orderliness 62% ; Emotional Stability 64% ; Open Mindedness 74%

    Quotes:
    "If somebody asks your MBTI type on a first date, run". -Donna Cecilia
    "Enneagram is psychological underpinnings. Cognitive Functions are mental reasoning and perceptional processes. -Sanjuro

  10. #90
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Well, Halla, you have to understand that socionics relationships make typing somewhat tautological (and also prone to regressum ad infinitum, if you want to take the algorithm to its end). Basically if you're ESTp and you have a really good relationship with your wife which tests as INFj...well, she is probably an organized INFp, or a somewhat introverted ENFj. Relationships are more important than type for socionics, thus if two conflictors are able to have a GREAT relationship, they're not considered conflictors.

    It doesn't have anything to do with j-p switching or any concept like that.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

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