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[INFJ] So I'm walking through the supermarket...

Fluffywolf

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...how can I spot that INFJ girl I've been seeking?

a) Is she the one looking curiously at the peanut butter etiqette?
b) Is she the one keeping a visual inventory of her cart by constantly checking what's inside?
c) Is the the one that stares at the vegetables attempting to make a choice for tonights supper?
d) Is she the one that doesn't do her groceries in the supermarket?

I'm very serious. I never seem meet INFJ's in real life. Must find out where to look!
 

StoryOfMyLife

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Hmm...when I go shopping, I'm usually the one constantly checking my cart to see what I've got and trying to remember what I need [if I haven't brought a list along with me]. I'm also the one with my phone out, using the calculator function to make sure that I can get as many items as I can without going over my set budget...
 

Cronkle

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1.5% of the population, according to the estimates of INFJ (Confidant) Personality Type - Jungian.

That's hard right off the bat. D) I think, instead of the supermarket, you should check where you might find an INFJ: a library or at a rally or activist group, any place where you might find a quiet visionary. or E) Maybe a health food supermarket, people who devote time to spiritual growth also enjoy physical and mental health.
 

Fluffywolf

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Hmm, both bring forth good and strong arguements! A library might be a good place to observe. I can just take a book and read. It's also very easy to initiate conversation in a library. :yes:



There aren't many activists/rally groups around where I live, and I doubt that would be a particularly good place to get aquinted with people for the sake of getting to know them.

"Hey, you're also a supporter?"
"Well, not exactly, I'm trying to get to ehh, know a certain type of person?"
*deathly stare*
 

nanook

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my female FiNe mate (a dichotomy judger) has a very straight forward way of shopping. in and out. focused. may have a list in mind or on paper. i on the other hand (NiFe, dichotomy perceiver) sort of meditate in shops, looking for nonduality in the humming sound of a refrigerator (a shop girl has been asking me, if i am sick), or stumble around like inspector columbo (ie 'absent minded professor') or maybe/sometimes i almost dance around, to the music in my ipod (sansa e280 actually). i try to feel into my appetite, while looking at the products, which takes long, because i am very bad at feeling/sensing that. i am struggling with my discipline. not to buy just sweets. or i am struggling with fatigue because i had it all before. in the meanwhile i observe as much people as i can.


but it's mostly a habit. i have time to waste. i could be straight forward too.
 

Cronkle

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A bookstore may be better than a library. You might get shushed in a library.
 

Fluffywolf

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Well, here in the Netherlands, libraries aren't as strict as the libraries I see in the movies all the time. ;)
 

Skyward

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I'm very much like Nanook when it comes to grocery shopping. If I'm not looking for something in particular, it takes me forever. But if I have a list I tend to hover back and forth between two brands to make sure I can get the better deal. I listen to my iPod all the time too.

How would you start a conversation with them anyways? I always get held back if there isn't an obvious icebreaker in the environment. I -really- don't like consciously being random.

For a more non-usual way to find them:
I know 2 INFJs from City of Villains, an MMO. If you go to the Virtue server and situate yourself in a strong Roleplay group, you'll be surrounded by INFJs :D
 

Split_Infinitive

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That's interesting, before I even read any of the other posts I was going to say I tend to dawdle, take my time and listen to my iPod! Seeing that others have posted the same, I would say you need to look for that girl who takes her time and listens to her iPod. Maybe she observes people, but in a disengaged way. And I try not to frown but have a relaxed face or a hint of a smile (the idea being that I look friendly, but maybe I just look slightly deranged).

Anyway, the inherent problem with this scenario is that when you DO go and approach an INFJ in the supermarket, she will smile at you, kindly listen to what you are saying, but give disengaged answers that say "I'm sure you mean well and I am not a bad tempered person so I will be friendly to you, but could you go away now please? I have just reached a very good song on my iPod and I am in the mood to emotionally tap into the specific feeling of that song and not really to engage in any E-type activities."

Or maybe that's just me...

Shame I don't frequent the Albert Heyn any more these days - they don't have them in New Zealand ;)
 

nanook

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yeah, it's very hard to get me to open up to a stranger. a year ago the sweetest girl approached me in the supermarket and I discouraged her immediately, fearing that her true interest can not possibly be an interest in who i actually am. maybe she is scientifically curious about indigenous creatures (her physiognomy had something very curious about it), maybe she has made a bet with her girlfriends about getting information out of that weirdo. most likely she just confuses me with someone ... normal. you know, the normal guy who is a bit off in an entertaining/interesting way. not off for real. i still hope i will see her again one day, and be more daring, but i probably would just play the same game again. instinctive reaction.

so, if she were like me, trying twice would be a good idea. giving her a chance to feel stupid, and to sleep about it.
 

cascadeco

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Yeah..sorry Fluffywolf, I don't think there's going to be a "This is how all INFJ's shop" way. ;)

I don't like running errands, so I just want to get in and get out as quick as possible, and I'm not really there to strike up conversation. Guess I'm not friendly in that regard, although if someone makes a comment to me I'll smile or make a brief comment in response - but I'm definitely not one to engage. ;-). Grocery shopping is a chore for me. I might look spacey around the vegetables and fruit, deciding what looks fresh and what I really want to get, but other than that, I pretty much know what I'm going to get before I go, and am on a mission to get it done and leave. :)

Where to look? Eh...I don't know that generalities are all that helpful. I know several INFJ's and we have varied interests. I don't know that we're the most approachable people though - esp. w/ regards to strangers coming up to us.

I'd say if you're interested in one thing, then start doing that. Common interest groups are good ways of meeting people.

We're everywhere (and nowhere), I tell you!!
 

Kyrielle

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...how can I spot that INFJ girl I've been seeking?

a) Is she the one looking curiously at the peanut butter etiqette?
b) Is she the one keeping a visual inventory of her cart by constantly checking what's inside?
c) Is the the one that stares at the vegetables attempting to make a choice for tonights supper?
d) Is she the one that doesn't do her groceries in the supermarket?

I'm very serious. I never seem meet INFJ's in real life. Must find out where to look!

For me: A combination of B and C. I usually have a list with me that I check every once in a while. I'm usually the one grabbing only what I need, not bothering to deliberate much unless it's something like "soup" on my list and I look at the endless shelves of soup and go "Hmm..."

Agreed with Skyward on the iPod. If I'm not with someone, then I'll have an headphones on my ears. Normally, I shop with my roommates and I can be found to be the one saying really random things that make my roommates shake their heads. :D

I also don't like to be in there long if I don't have to be. Lots of people I have little patience for in supermarkets, hence the iPod so I don't have to listen to them, plus I see gathering food there as a minor waste of my time--except for the fact that I need food or I will die.

So a supermarket is not the best place to approach an INFJ from what it sounds like. Probably because we're in "go away, I'm busy and want to do something less boring" mode.

Agreed with cascademn. Your chances of running into one you like are greater when you do something you enjoy.
 

Fluffywolf

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It is clear this is no easy task. But I shall not give up. o/

Thanks for the thoughts. :D
 

mlittrell

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INFJs are rare. bottom line. and i wouldn't really use behaviors like "constantly looking in her cart" to help you decide her type. that causes instant problems.

an if its a relationship you seek, never limit yourself to one type. especially if its the rarest lol
 
V

violaine

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Maybe a health food supermarket, people who devote time to spiritual growth also enjoy physical and mental health.

Yes, frequent health food stores and 'organic'/vegetarian/vegan restaurants. You're bound to meet one there.
 

Kasper

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I tend to dawdle, take my time and listen to my iPod! Seeing that others have posted the same, I would say you need to look for that girl who takes her time and listens to her iPod. Maybe she observes people, but in a disengaged way.

Yes, frequent health food stores and 'organic'/vegetarian/vegan restaurants. You're bound to meet one there.

Careful, using them as hints could mean you end up bumping into me. You wouldn't want that now would you ;)
 

Fluffywolf

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Why wouldn't I want that? You are very interesting as well!



Anyhow, for a relationship? I'd be lying if I said no, but that's just a tiny part and I wouldn't ever limit that to one type. :)
Real reason is that I just feel a sort of connection between INFJ and what I like most in people. So main idea is to get to meet them, befriend them! xD
 

Kasper

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Just saying that there's no way of knowing what someone's type is by where or how they shop unless they happen to make it easy for you by wearing a t-shirt with INFJ on it. I’m NT yet there are plenty of NF stereotypes I can fit.

You say you feel a connection with INFJs, so make it easy on yourself and look for a connection not a type.
 

ConchShell

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Somewhere among the boxes of fairtrade tea and bottles of environmentally friendly washing up liquid.

Or... get to know lots of ENFPs and ENTPs. As it's easy enough to find these types, you'll find the INFJs lurking somewhere near them. (INFJs are supposedly meant to get on well with both these types).
 
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Huh, it's verifiable that infjs prefer fewer people and quiet (or at least try to limit distractions somehow) to take care of daily chores, during very early or late hours. I don't know about your questions, threadstarter.
 
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