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Thread: Ask an ENFJ

  1. #71
    Senior Member Cronkle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gtzk View Post
    Have you ever found yourself in the strange position of playing games with everyone around you?
    Have you ever felt that you might be wiser than your peers and tried to make them grow into something more [insert preference of word]?
    Have you ever found yourself in a power position, and used whatever knowledge you had at the time to accomplish your dreams/ideas?

    Umm. I didn't read all of it until now but I feel I didn't really get those questions answered... correctly.
    It was as if something lacked, but what do I know.
    \
    1. What do you mean?
    2. Wiser, not exactly. More well-read, definitely. In any case, we each have different times of intelligence: mine happens to be kinesthetic, verbal, and interpersonal, according to Howard Gardners' Multiple Intelligences test.
    3. Nothing comes to mind.

    Sorry I couldn't be of more help D:

  2. #72
    Senior Member Cronkle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by the state i am in View Post
    not really. it bothers me when i have to waste time reading things that don't apply or help me, but then i just skim and the problem is solved. explanations are exhausting and Nts are generally better at that than Nfs... when they want to be (!). we sense very subjective patterns and act on them even before we can articulate or explicate them.

    also, it bothers me when i think the guesswork of others is really terrible guesswork, when i do not like their perceptions, etc. but seriously, who am i to say that? take the good with the bad, i guess. and so far there's probably been 10-15 speakers who are consistently helpful and relevant for me. the connection helps improve my quality of information and detect patterns in a much more empirically interesting way. also, the connection FEELS good.
    I totally agree, I love conciseness. Fair enough, maybe I'm different than everyone else in that when I trust my intuition, I also know a specific trait that the intuition is coming from...? Maybe that is more of a sensation, since, say I'm watching Samuel L. Jackson, inexplicably, i'll feel that he is ENFJ. After the initial intuition, I'll think and realize that a specific trait would be his friendlyness and way of talking which is very much similar to mine.

    Who do you think is the best at typing and which books or sites do you trust?

  3. #73
    the Dark Prophet of Kualu
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cronkle View Post
    \
    1. What do you mean?
    2. Wiser, not exactly. More well-read, definitely. In any case, we each have different times of intelligence: mine happens to be kinesthetic, verbal, and interpersonal, according to Howard Gardners' Multiple Intelligences test.
    3. Nothing comes to mind.

    Sorry I couldn't be of more help D:
    1. As if most of your aqquaintences found their way into your long-term planning and each step covers something that might correspond to a game or test. To be able to read further and further. To ease relationship between you and them, also to strengthen their selves. If such action is needed of course.
    Open for interpretation.
    Jo
    Fell for the temptation: Nohari / Johari

  4. #74
    the Dark Prophet of Kualu
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    Oh, and has it happened that you deeply misread the situation and created a problem that was more of a personal one of your own than of someone elses?
    Open for interpretation.
    Jo
    Fell for the temptation: Nohari / Johari

  5. #75
    Senior Member Cronkle's Avatar
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    Yes, that's really well-said. They just happen to be people I have met while working toward goals. I don't see the game aspect, but I do definitely see each conversation as an opportunity to be able to better understand people and how they think.

    Each conversation seems an attempt to not get hurt, mostly. And to have my ideas respected while trying to be authentic about them.

    I have probably misread many situations. I'm not that old, and an ENFP I know commented on how I tend to speak in definitives. For example, if I saw someone with a red face and a scowl I would say "I wonder why she's mad?" as opposed to "She seems mad. I wonder why?"

  6. #76
    the Dark Prophet of Kualu
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    The game-aspect comes in whenever one might feel down and strongly uneven in terms of relating to others. I wonder if you experience that part?
    Open for interpretation.
    Jo
    Fell for the temptation: Nohari / Johari

  7. #77
    Senior Member Cronkle's Avatar
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    I still don't see it as analogous to a game. I think I can use others as an instrument to getting what I want, but I think that's more out of feeling unfilled and wanting to find something more: someone to talk with, someone to argue with, someone to LOVE.

  8. #78
    the Dark Prophet of Kualu
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    I am curious about how you acted when you were around... 4-6 years old and also if you've had any troubles in school concerning naively believing friends to be friends and/or got bullied?

    If you meet someone for the first time, do you immediately go along on terms of reading and scrutinizing every little part; and perhaps lift some topic's that you find might be useful for the counter-part to know/think about?(Of course without being too forward, more in a subliminal way.)
    Open for interpretation.
    Jo
    Fell for the temptation: Nohari / Johari

  9. #79
    the Dark Prophet of Kualu
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cronkle View Post
    I still don't see it as analogous to a game. I think I can use others as an instrument to getting what I want, but I think that's more out of feeling unfilled and wanting to find something more: someone to talk with, someone to argue with, someone to LOVE.
    Which means you probably are quite more healthy than I am.
    I need to come to terms with myself. (Sorry, had to think)

    Do you enjoy listening to "Hello Saferide!" ?
    (Just random question. Felt my reply went a little underhandedly without a question whereas I thought and just didn't want to erase my own scribbles.)
    Open for interpretation.
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  10. #80
    Senior Member Cronkle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gtzk View Post
    I am curious about how you acted when you were around... 4-6 years old and also if you've had any troubles in school concerning naively believing friends to be friends and/or got bullied?

    If you meet someone for the first time, do you immediately go along on terms of reading and scrutinizing every little part; and perhaps lift some topic's that you find might be useful for the counter-part to know/think about?(Of course without being too forward, more in a subliminal way.)
    I think I was a gentle, sensitive person. I still am. I clearly didn't analyze people or their intentions back then, but that's more of a defense mechanism for remaining true to my sensitive self without getting hurt every couple of seconds by people who are more harsh and strident.

    I somehow escaped being bullied. I was kind of nerdy, but I was pleasant to everyone and so no one minded, I guess. I think my friends now are mostly superficial, but maybe it's that they just aren't at the point in their life in which they want to live The Good Life. Then again, the line between friend and acquaintance is sort of blurred with me. :/

    When I meet someone, I try to figure out who they are and how best to act around them; depending on multiple factors, I may be a different level of up-front about how I feel. Mostly, I refrain from my true self out of an urge to be polite, perhaps a kind of self-preservation? I'm still looking for the one--the NF ideal, I guess--to complete me, or at least complement me.

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