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  1. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by revolve View Post
    This is a question for ENFPs & INFPs that are totally single: How do you cope with NOT being in a relationship? Do you feel like you are constantly waiting to meet the next one or "the one"? Do you find every day to be painful like I do? What do you do to get through these trying times?
    I have learned one thing about relationships in my life (only 1 thing, I am shitty at every other aspect). You will not find love by looking for it. Live your life, enjoy being single, and love will blindside you most likely.

  2. #72
    `~~Philosoflying~~` SillySapienne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goatman455 View Post
    I have learned one thing about relationships in my life (only 1 thing, I am shitty at every other aspect). You will not find love by looking for it. Live your life, enjoy being single, and love will blindside you most likely.
    o noes, how this is so very true!!!

    i am so productive when i am not all wrapped up with someone else, both figuratively and literally.

    I am currently crushing on a guy bad, it's scaring meeeeeeeeeee!!!!
    `
    'Cause you can't handle me...

    "A lie is a lie even if everyone believes it. The truth is the truth even if nobody believes it." - David Stevens

    "That that is, is. That that is not, is not. Is that it? It is."

    Veritatem dies aperit

    Ride si sapis

    Intelligentle sparkles

  3. #73
    Senior Member Clonester's Avatar
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    I'm definitely happy being single right now, though at the same time something feels missing. It's probably because I live on my own. I enjoy the freedom, but being the only one here drives me nuts sometimes. But I'm typically out doing stuff so it's often not a problem. At times it can be frustrating when it's not going to work out with a girl for whatever reason, yet you can imagine in your head that it will work out anyway. Reality is different than the ideal one creates in their head.

    So being in a relationship is certainly comforting because you know, even if you are alone, it doesn't feel like you are alone because there's someone out there thinking about and who cares about you.
    ENFP Male: E-74% N-95% F-58% P-84% 3w2
    "I feel there are two people inside me - me and my intuition. If I go against her, she'll screw me every time, and if I follow her, we get along quite nicely." -Kim Basinger

  4. #74
    Senior Member SciVo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goatman455 View Post
    I have learned one thing about relationships in my life (only 1 thing, I am shitty at every other aspect). You will not find love by looking for it. Live your life, enjoy being single, and love will blindside you most likely.
    I tried that and it didn't work very well. I finally decided that the problem was that it's hard to meet people by going home and reading after work -- believe it or not, in the last year, exactly zero attractive young women broke into my apartment to introduce themselves to me! So, now I make a point of doing at least one thing every week where I'm likely to meet new people, such as going out to a show by a local band. I'm assuming that for ENFPs, such people-meeting activities are included in "live your life, enjoy being single."
    INFP ~ Fi/Ne/Ni/Te ~ 9-2-4 sp/so

  5. #75
    Was E.laur Laurie's Avatar
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    ^ I like this post.

  6. #76
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    Quote Originally Posted by SciVo View Post
    I tried that and it didn't work very well. I finally decided that the problem was that it's hard to meet people by going home and reading after work -- believe it or not, in the last year, exactly zero attractive young women broke into my apartment to introduce themselves to me! So, now I make a point of doing at least one thing every week where I'm likely to meet new people, such as going out to a show by a local band. I'm assuming that for ENFPs, such people-meeting activities are included in "live your life, enjoy being single."

    I think you might be focusing a bit too much on the details and taking my comment to the extreme. You never go out grocery shopping, to a restaurant? How do you survive without ever leaving the house. I refuse to believe you stay indoors 24/7.

    You may not buy it, but trust me, looking for love is not how you find it, eventually I think you will understand what I am saying, when you find someone you love that you didn't see coming.

  7. #77
    Senior Member Clonester's Avatar
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    I get what you're saying Goatman. But you don't have to be looking for love when you go out and do stuff. It's just enjoying life. Love may find you, but not if you don't meet people.
    ENFP Male: E-74% N-95% F-58% P-84% 3w2
    "I feel there are two people inside me - me and my intuition. If I go against her, she'll screw me every time, and if I follow her, we get along quite nicely." -Kim Basinger

  8. #78
    Feelin' FiNe speculative's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goatman455 View Post
    I think you might be focusing a bit too much on the details and taking my comment to the extreme. You never go out grocery shopping, to a restaurant? How do you survive without ever leaving the house. I refuse to believe you stay indoors 24/7.
    I have never witnessed two people who did not already know each other meeting and getting to know each other at a grocery store, restaurant, or other venue where people normally go just as part of their everyday lives.

    Now a concert, or some sort of event, that's different. I went to an event for the local animal shelter this weekend and chatted with someone I had never met before briefly.

    So, I do think you have to make an effort to do things and go places where people do not normally go just to function in everyday life in order to meet new people...
    "How can I be, all I want to be,
    When all I want to do is strip away these stilled constraints
    And crush this charade, shred this sad, masquerade"
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGeq5v7L3WM

  9. #79
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clonester View Post
    I get what you're saying Goatman. But you don't have to be looking for love when you go out and do stuff. It's just enjoying life. Love may find you, but not if you don't meet people.


    I didn't say to look for it, quite the opposite. Also, most people I know who were married met in ordinary circumstances.

    I can't imagine that anyone, even a large Introvert, who would be in circumstances where they don't meet people at least from time to time.


    I am not saying you can't find love if you look for it, I mean in the end, if two people want love, and they are willing to accept the other person for who they are, they will fall in love and be happy.

    I don't want to discourage anyone, it was just an observation I had noticed. Two people can love each other under any circumstances they choose, if they really are desperate.

    I think it is more the attitude I was referring to when you do go out. If you want a one night stand, look for 'love'. If you want love, be yourself.

  10. #80
    Senior Member Clonester's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goatman455 View Post

    I think it is more the attitude I was referring to when you do go out.
    True. A strong/deep connection with a girl is not something that can be forced.
    ENFP Male: E-74% N-95% F-58% P-84% 3w2
    "I feel there are two people inside me - me and my intuition. If I go against her, she'll screw me every time, and if I follow her, we get along quite nicely." -Kim Basinger

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