User Tag List

123 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 33

  1. #1
    Senior Member Xellotath's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Socionics
    IEE
    Posts
    181

    Unhappy Fi-types hating Fi

    And this is how I will prove that I'm crazy...

    I'm an ENFP, Fi is my supporting function and due to a few personal reasons, I've grown to mistrust it to the point of anxiety.

    I was wondering if there was anyone out there that didn't idealize this particular function as the magical-human-connection-/-door-to-the-collective-unconscious-thing.

    For Fi-types..
    Have you ever wished you would feel differently?

    Am I alone in viewing that part of me as a sickness or a cage? Something that does not really have its place here on earth? It's like a current, a feeling that everyone is connected and worst of all, it's judgmental and righteous. It's impossible to rationalize with it. And exercising it feels so -right- as if getting high, like a drug. But I also know its incorrect and I could never begin to justify it or define it.

    I hate it. I want out of these "spiritual feelings". How does one unhook from a function at all?

    Affirmations? Tried that.
    "I will not see the connection."
    "Everyone is fundamentally alone and isolated"
    "There is no right or wrong. That's just your feelings, stupid."
    "The mechanics of the universe are cold, distant and impersonal"
    [Problem is I say it... I know it.. but I don't -believe- it.]

    Or.. have I really, officially lost my mind?

  2. #2
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ESFP
    Enneagram
    9w8 sx/sp
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    7,005

    Default

    You are most likely just feeling fleeting emotions right now and want them to stop. I think that you'll be fine. I personally would miss my Fi a great deal, it feels like a blessing and a curse to me, but mostly just a blessing.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  3. #3
    Senior Member Xellotath's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Socionics
    IEE
    Posts
    181

    Default

    I probably am..

    I suppose it started with a conversation I had with a friend.
    Strong Fe. She obviously..sympathized first, but then confessed that she couldn't really see/feel the connections as I did. She, like most Fe's that I've met... assume independence first.. then connect later, I assume, something like genuine empathy. My emotional assumptions immediately connect people to something magical, childlike and cosmological.. then its just me trying to push and separate things partly because my intellect objects to this with the threat of "inconsistence".

    Is it possible to disconnect? I mean, I could stay in la-la-land forever .. because it feels lovely.

    How's this for a nasty contemplation:
    Fi drives us to feel some weird sense of empathy and connectedness, right?
    If the connectedness was true.. then it should follow that all would feel connected.
    It's not true, therefore... we are all crazy.

  4. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ?
    Posts
    238

    Default

    I prefer using Te or Fe more, for fairness and objectivity, but Fi's capacity for empathy and depth of feeling is truly a blessing. I've found it to be a gift, but I feel I want to have all those characteristics without the negatives for objectivity in most situations, for that expense have made it less pronounced until the other cognitive processes are understood effectively, this is under further contemplation though.

  5. #5
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ESFP
    Enneagram
    9w8 sx/sp
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    7,005

    Default

    I can disconnect when I meditate and have music on.

    And if it's not true then we will correct ourselves and stop feeling that way, that's how I feel anyways when this happens. I feel the after effects of the feelings still, but it's not lush and it's a "getting it out of me" process. So you aren't crazy, other people that would see what this was without knowing what it was would think you are crazy. Crazy is an opinion. It's not crazy to feel as deep as we do.

    I have to admit, I went through what you did. A good friend of mine has a strong Fe (INFJ), and I got the same reaction you did. It was sort of disappointing but what can you do?
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  6. #6
    veteran attention whore Jeffster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    ESFP
    Enneagram
    7w6 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    6,727

    Default

    I think maybe as a kid I hated it, because I thought it held me back from having a lot of fun and caused me to be a coward and a wuss. Now I'm actually thankful for it sometimes, for keeping me out of a lot of long-term trouble. I think I'm more balanced now, so even though I still get pissed at myself, it's not nearly as often.
    Jeffster Illustrates the Artisan Temperament <---- click here

    "I like the sigs with quotes in them from other forum members." -- Oberon

    The SP Spazz Youtube Channel

  7. #7
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    infj
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    2,460

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    I personally would miss my Fi a great deal, it feels like a blessing and a curse to me, but mostly just a blessing.
    this is exactly how i see Fi. sometimes it's a ticking timebomb. it can be so paralyzingly tragic. nothing can stop its momentum. but it also can be the most human, warmest, most HEALING function available. it depends on health, support, and the fit between the environment and the Fi core. and it's usually somewhere in between.

    as an Fe i help articulate and free trapped emotions for others. i show them a bigger picture that allows them to accept and appreciate the complexity of the world and their place within it. Fi helps warm them up and thaw them out. it makes them believe, have faith, be strong. it opens a space for people to commune and share their interiors. it can be emotionally purifying, accepting, and profoundly beautiful.

    the weakness and frustration of Fi is in its slowness and its sometimes inability to articulate itself. the weakness of Fe is in its inability to be grounded, content, and not shape-shift with the weather.

    i love my Fi friends for their depth of feeling, their conviction, their idealism, and their warmth. yet it can become exhausting for them and for me. but we all wish our functions were more successful at times and without obvious weaknesses. and they are able to do (and enrich my life bc of it) what i cannot.

  8. #8

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Siegfried View Post
    I want to have all those characteristics without the negatives for objectivity in most situations
    Aren't objectivity, authenticity and truth pretty closely linked concepts? How does the pursuit of authenticity undermine objectivity? Or reworded, how does seeing the person, rather than creating the person from various ideas you have in your head of what people are, appear more subjective? It tends to mean you have something less predictable in your system when you come to make the decision. But I don't really see why ignoring parts of a system, so logic feels more certain, achieves anything more objective or solid. It is just feels like it does.
    Freude, schöner Götterfunken Tochter aus Elysium, Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, dein Heiligtum! Deine Zauber binden wieder Was die Mode streng geteilt; Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.

  9. #9
    rawr Costrin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Socionics
    LII
    Posts
    2,320

    Default

    I suggest you learn to love your Fi. Really for a lot of people they could learn to use their auxiliary function more. Don't be afraid of it. Sounds like you might be falling to tertiary temptation.
    "All humour has a foundation of truth."
    - Costrin

  10. #10
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    infj
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    2,460

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Xellotath View Post
    I probably am..

    I suppose it started with a conversation I had with a friend.
    Strong Fe. She obviously..sympathized first, but then confessed that she couldn't really see/feel the connections as I did. She, like most Fe's that I've met... assume independence first.. then connect later, I assume, something like genuine empathy. My emotional assumptions immediately connect people to something magical, childlike and cosmological.. then its just me trying to push and separate things partly because my intellect objects to this with the threat of "inconsistence".
    we give empathy differently. we feel that feelings should be updated and feedbacked by Ni and Ti. they should change. ours do bc we feel with the symbols and objects around us. and the way that that is organized via Ni big picture perspective changes the whole colour of the symbolic landscape.

    we want to connect with the feeling core of others, but we do not have something so deeply held, concentrated, inwardly accumulated to give in return. we cannot empathize with you in the way you empathize with us. we want to tweak and show you other ways to perceive that could alleviate what we see as a mental/emotional cramp (when you are hurting). we feel that eliciting your feelings out from your interior and helping you articulate them should help free you from the suffering they give you (when they are painful). but that is not necessarily what you need, and why the communication can get so fucked up sometimes.

    we want to merge with your feelings somewhere in the middle, but it can be trying bc there is so much complexity, chaos, and colour in Fi that new perspectives and angles keep upsetting the connection/articulation. it feels like you are just going in circles, but the feeling itself is multi-faceted, threaded, and complex in ways that are not easily linguistic (sequentially ordered, sentenced, etc). tipping the scales, weighing out all the feeling tones, wanting a unanimous decision internally that FEELS good and satisfying and freeing. it's a slow process. 4 hour conversations that explore much but don't reach conclusion. it feels impossible sometimes to break thru or penetrate straight into the heart of things.

Similar Threads

  1. [Fi] Why does everyone hate on Fi?
    By Elfboy in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 292
    Last Post: 06-01-2013, 08:09 PM
  2. Explaining Ti to Fi types
    By simulatedworld in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 40
    Last Post: 08-17-2010, 09:34 PM
  3. Replies: 6
    Last Post: 11-04-2009, 09:16 PM
  4. [Fi] Issues you have with Fi types
    By BlackCat in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 117
    Last Post: 07-30-2009, 12:45 PM
  5. [Fi] NTJs: how does Fi manifest in your type?
    By Venom in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 38
    Last Post: 02-07-2009, 05:08 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO