(Dunno where to put this. Seems more personal than academic to me. )
I hate college! Classrooms have never suited me, traditional learning has never made me anything but bitter. I am not smarter for all the years I have passed through the damnable system, just incredibly depressed and prejudiced towards things I once loved. I write so many essays, so many papers, that the thought of writing just one more makes me cry. No, I am not joking, tears are cascading down my cheeks as I sit down to write this 350 word "proof by reason" essay. Can something so short really even be called an essay? I do not know but it is the first "paper" I am sitting down to write this semester, I am completely repulsed by it. Oh lord, how will I make it through this time. I just want to drop everything and run from my campus. The people are lovely, I have never been bullied and nobody but lovesick dogs bother me. It is not as though I wish to avoid the people in particular, it is just the whole setup. What is wrong with me? Nobody understands my intense dislike of schooling. We all have the fleeting dislike of homework on occasion, but my very soul repels the thought of picking up another assignment. I doubt that so many people feel this awful at the prospect of doing another mundane problem, or perhaps they have been whipped completely into submission. It can work for some people, obviously, but what about those of us that are not fulfilled by the one system?
I do not know, maybe something is terribly wrong with my mind. Diagnose me, please.