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[NF] Do Others Have this Problem?

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Glycerine

Guest
So I'm 19 and the people I tend to connect with the most are usually 20-30 years older. It's not that I don't like my peers, it's just really interesting. I let out my pretty immature when I'm around them but when I'm around much older individuals, I'm a lot more serious and get into many in depth conversations. Can others identiy with this?
 

ThatsWhatHeSaid

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May 11, 2007
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No, because the older people I meet tend to be more interested in their kids than in philosophy. :) Doesn't really seem like a "problem," though.

(Moved from NF Idyllic.)
 

Kyrielle

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So I'm 19 and the people I tend to connect with the most are usually 20-30 years older. It's not that I don't like my peers, it's just really interesting. I let out my pretty immature when I'm around them but when I'm around much older individuals, I'm a lot more serious and get into many in depth conversations. Can others identiy with this?

Sometimes. I tend to feel the most comfortable with folks in their late 20s and early 30s. I don't know why. I'm not neccessarily that much more serious around them. It just seems like when an interesting topic comes up admist the goofing around, it's easier to keep discussing that topic. With younger people, I've noticed an increased tendency to have difficulty in switching between degrees of seriousness. It's like it has to be one extreme or the other per conversation. Beause of this, it's difficult for me to feel as invested in a conversation with younger people because I can switch from being serious to not-serious at the drop of a hat. It's very frustrating when the rest of the people I'm talking to take a lot longer to switch modes.
 
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beyondaurora

Guest
So I'm 19 and the people I tend to connect with the most are usually 20-30 years older. It's not that I don't like my peers, it's just really interesting. I let out my pretty immature when I'm around them but when I'm around much older individuals, I'm a lot more serious and get into many in depth conversations. Can others identiy with this?

Yes, I can relate. When I was a teenager, all my 'friends' were my teachers, adult neighbors, counselors, parents that I babysat for, etc. It seemed I awed everyone around me as being "wise beyond [my] years" and an "old soul". But I certainly had my goofy, immature side that came out with my family and boyfriend (I didn't have many friends because I really didn't connect with people my age).
 
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Glycerine

Guest
Yes, I can relate. When I was a teenager, all my 'friends' were my teachers, adult neighbors, counselors, parents that I babysat for, etc. It seemed I awed everyone around me as being "wise beyond [my] years" and an "old soul". But I certainly had my goofy, immature side that came out with my family and boyfriend (I didn't have many friends because I really didn't connect with people my age).
Does it tend to even once you get older?
 
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beyondaurora

Guest
Does it tend to even once you get older?
Oddly, for me, it seems that I am now making up for missing out on the immaturity that usually goes along with youth. I am less interested in deep conversations with older adults and more interested in connecting with people my age.
 
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Glycerine

Guest
Oddly, for me, it seems that I am now making up for missing out on the immaturity that usually goes along with youth. I am less interested in deep conversations with older adults and more interested in connecting with people my age.
That sounds like a lot of fun. ;). i have a feeling that I'm going to go wild once I graduate and get a job.
 

Winds of Thor

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So I'm 19 and the people I tend to connect with the most are usually 20-30 years older. It's not that I don't like my peers, it's just really interesting. I let out my pretty immature when I'm around them but when I'm around much older individuals, I'm a lot more serious and get into many in depth conversations. Can others identiy with this?

Up until like age 23 or so, I always felt more comfortable around older people, and related to them on a more mature level. And I think they saw this and appreciated it in me...Usually treated me as an adult back at me and we carried on mature conversations, Yes! I connect with you on this..

Of course there were some older people who were emotionally and intellectually immature...that hadn't grown up to the level I would imagine as average for their age anyway, and so again, didn't get along with them comfortably either. Especially if they made attempts to make fun of me out of some trivial thing..just annoying.

But as a child I had a really tough time relating with my Dad...and it just turned my gut in knots. He's an S, I'm an N. So perhaps I sought older more mature people because 1.) they are more approachably mature on average. 2.) They have had more life experiences and have probably flushed-out and seen past the pointless immaturity. Personally, I think immaturity is there for the important reason of letting older people excuse behavior which is appears stupid..afterall, kids don't know what they're doing. Same as the reason puppies are cute..as I heard someone say one time..."it's so we don't kill them when they destroy our house and get into all sorts of mischief". lol..but anyway..

Things usually work to the better..All things overall, do. It's normal. Everyone has problems. It's how you deal with them is what matters. And some who don't seem to have problems do have problems..it's just that some of us have things which are apparent to others while the rest of people have problems which aren't apparent or visible to others.:)

But I think some of that awkwardness has to do with peer pressures and everyone developing one's social style too. For example, I don't feel comfortable running with the crowd...it just feels like being bound to something artificial, and which I refuse. Maybe you're a free thinker..and would appreciate an opportunity to cut loose and develop your own style! Go for it if this is you! Everyone develops theirs whether they know it or not, so what the heck..Life is what you make it!
Let it Ride~:)
 

Domino

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I've always been drawn to older people. I enjoy their company. I find the bulk of my interests fall into older generational zones. Like antique furniture, lit, music, movies, etc. I was raised with my Grandfather early and was influenced heavily by the atmosphere of someone who was born an Edwardian (1905) and most of our furniture was very old.

Plus older people seem to be at least somewhat calmer and have experiences that can help me. Not that I don't like people in general, but older types have been indispensable.
 

Biaxident

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Jan 10, 2009
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I had always preferred the stories and anecdotes of older generations, to the shallow "Yeah, we went out and got stupid last night, and *** got arrested for groping some girl..." or "Ooooo...did you see that designer dress? It only cost $500..." of many people my age and younger.
 

kiddykat

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Yeah.. a lot of older people tend to talk to me for whatever reason. They tend to be really funny and light-hearted, I enjoy their thoughts, stories, experiences, views on life. A few friends that I identify most with, tend to be older.. We can talk on the phone for hours.

So long as people are fun to talk to, polite, kind, then I don't mind what age they are. I enjoy them for who they are.

If you've ever been to a retirement home to talk to older people, they're just like children (adults who stay young at heart), it's cute. And I think they deserve to respect to be heard.
 

Nonsensical

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I'm only in High School and it seems as though not a lot of people understand what I'm saying when I'm being serious. A lot of people aren't as open minded or aware of some of the things I like to talk about. People don't understand when I try to tell them about certain things..people are so naive at my age.

I can connect to my elders. I have a slew of college friends that actually know what I'm talking about, and understand. I can talk heavy- on heavy situations dealing with intense situations, where it seems as though older people, with more life experience can connect with.
 

Nonsensical

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haha, good so it's actually fairly normal. :)

Doesn't matter if it's normal, because it isn't completely normal. In a way, it's a good thing, though. You should be proud, because what does the average 19 year old talk about? Like Biaxident said- it's mostly about stupid things that don't matter..when you're talking to elders, it usually means that you are advanced for you're age in intellect, wisdom, creativity, or whatever.
 
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Glycerine

Guest
Doesn't matter if it's normal, because it isn't completely normal. In a way, it's a good thing, though. You should be proud, because what does the average 19 year old talk about? Like Biaxident said- it's mostly about stupid things that don't matter..when you're talking to elders, it usually means that you are advanced for you're age in intellect, wisdom, creativity, or whatever.

Those are some wise words right there. Thank you. :D
 

CrystalViolet

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It's good to mix it up with different people of different age groups. The "young un's" keep you young at heart, and the "Oldies" generally have a few interesting tales to tell, and for more likely, if they are the sort, to engage in long conversations about philosophy, science ect.
 
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