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Thread: TIME ALONE

  1. #1
    Member Thunderlight's Avatar
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    Default TIME ALONE

    I have a friend who doesn't understand that I like being alone sometimes, and that I really like doing some things by myself. He keeps getting angry and telling me that i have "blown" him off for the last time, etc. All I do is when he wants to hang out I sometimes say that I want to draw instead or read a book.

    This is during college breaks when no one else is around. Apparently he hates being alone at all and says he starts to dislike himself when he is alone. He always gets angry when i just want to be alone...


    does anyone have advice or any stories about this type of situation?

  2. #2
    Cat Wench ReadingRainbows's Avatar
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    Sometimes we all need our alone time, but other times we really need the human contact to thrive....I love the computer because it is so quiet but I loooooove one of my friends in particular because she is just so wonderful..yeah
    Quote Originally Posted by EffEmDoubleyou View Post
    St. Stephen took rocks and St. Sebastian took arrows. You only have to take some jerks on an internet forum. Nut up.

  3. #3
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    Have you straight up explained to your friend that you really need time alone? Also say that it's nothing against them.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  4. #4
    Junior Member blacksheep7895's Avatar
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    woooo college break 4 days alone in the house!! i had the same problem with a friend of mine, we fought for a while and after me repeatedly explaining that it had nothing to do with him and had everything to do with what i felt like doing he finally chilled out, but that was definitely a tense week

  5. #5
    Member Thunderlight's Avatar
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    yea i guess i should just tell him that it has nothin to do with him.

    don't cha just love 4 days with no one around?

    ::Edit:That was not meant to sound dirty!::

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by Thunderlight View Post
    yea i guess i should just tell him that it has nothin to do with him.

    don't cha just love 4 days with no one around?

    ::Edit:That was not meant to sound dirty!::
    .

    Alone time does rule. I'm getting more picky about it as I get older.
    Freude, schöner Götterfunken Tochter aus Elysium, Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, dein Heiligtum! Deine Zauber binden wieder Was die Mode streng geteilt; Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.

  7. #7
    lab rat extraordinaire CrystalViolet's Avatar
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    I ended a friendship quite recently over a similar issue. *sigh*She really didn't get it, no matter how I tried to explain it, she was determined to take offence. If it's one thing that drives me up the wall, it's neediness. Admittedly though, this was an extreme situation, and she was turning into a bunny boiler.
    Normally, all it takes is a sit down and a chat. Most people get it, or do after they've seen me so frazzled by overwhelm. Even extroverts like some alone time sometimes.
    Failing that, have you got a secret hide out (I used to hide at my exboyfriend's place when he wasn't there, with his permission, of course)? or just pretend you aren't there...or give him a teddy bear, so he's never alone...
    Currently submerged under an avalanche of books and paper work. I may come back up for air from time to time.
    Real life awaits and she is a demanding mistress.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  8. #8
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thunderlight View Post
    I have a friend who doesn't understand that I like being alone sometimes, and that I really like doing some things by myself. He keeps getting angry and telling me that i have "blown" him off for the last time, etc. All I do is when he wants to hang out I sometimes say that I want to draw instead or read a book.

    This is during college breaks when no one else is around. Apparently he hates being alone at all and says he starts to dislike himself when he is alone. He always gets angry when i just want to be alone...


    does anyone have advice or any stories about this type of situation?
    "Blowing someone off" is different from wanting to be alone.
    Don't make promises you can't keep.
    If you promise to do something with your friend... do it.

    If you need time alone... put it into your schedule and don't let anyone talk you out of it.
    Go be alone someplace else so he can't just pop in on you uninvited or unannounced.

    If he needs company that badly, he needs to have a collection of friends so he always has someone available and doesn't become a drain on the same person all the time.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Wild horses's Avatar
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    Yea my need for time alone and personal freedom has actually led to the breakdown of some friendships.. I just can't function if I have no down time... Time to reflect and be away from the crowd...
    ... couldn't drag me away

    eljko Ranatovic: argus
    eljko Ranatovic: do you want heir's?
    WildHorses: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    eljko Ranatovic: to carry your genealogical code??

  10. #10
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    I had an ISFJ friend who used to come over as soon as my kids got on the bus and left as soon as they got home. Pretty soon, I was suicidal! from never being alone!

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