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Thread: Is it common for INFJ's to come out of abusive/neglectful homes?

  1. #51
    lab rat extraordinaire Array CrystalViolet's Avatar
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    Oct 2008
    5w4 sx/sp


    Quote Originally Posted by MrME View Post
    If she was toxic, driving you toward suicide, then you have no choice but to protect yourself from her. That doesn't make you a bad person, it makes you a sane person. If somebody is so bold to call you a bad person because of it, you should feel free to tell them they're talking out of their asses and maybe they should mind their own effing business. They weren't there, so who are they to judge?
    I'd like to think that I was doing the sane thing. I think the hardest thing was when a long standing friend told me off...she should have known better, but then I did keep a lot of it to myself, plus I guess she never really saw how bad it got once I tried to leave home.
    You are right, though, it's nobodies business but my own. My ex-fiancee understood though, when I told him. From his point of view though, he knew exactly what damage my mother had wrecked upon me, and knew it was really only a matter of time.
    It would never come up in normal convo, except that people are curious as to why I'm living in OZ, as a kiwi. And with no family. (Yes, moving countries was the only way I could see breaking contact was possible.) I guess it's kinda rare for a women not to be close to her mother. I wouldn't have thought so though.
    Currently submerged under an avalanche of books and paper work. I may come back up for air from time to time.
    Real life awaits and she is a demanding mistress.

  2. #52
    .~ *aĉa virino* ~. Array Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Apr 2007
    549 sx/sp
    LII Ni


    Quote Originally Posted by Udog View Post
    I think it's a pretty common thing, in general. Many people have children before they've learned to care for themselves properly, and the children suffer for it. The INFJ may just be more sensitive to it than some other types.
    I've seen both.

    And yes, I think INFJs can be especially sensitive to it... so the impact is far more devastating when they feel they've been betrayed or abandoned.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

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