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  1. #11

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    No idea, felt it, but never really gone that far. I'm decently avoidative. And a pain in the ass to get close to emotionally.

    Normally I kill it by being disinterested, or I kill it by being too interested. And these days I have the cool combination of seeming disinterested when I'm really interested.
    Freude, schöner Götterfunken Tochter aus Elysium, Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, dein Heiligtum! Deine Zauber binden wieder Was die Mode streng geteilt; Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.

  2. #12
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sytpg View Post
    Love is a built-in defense mechanism which helps coping with there being no greener pastures within sight.
    omg that's funny! not true for me but oh so funny...haha
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  3. #13
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by noigmn View Post
    No idea, felt it, but never really gone that far. I'm decently avoidative. And a pain in the ass to get close to emotionally.

    Normally I kill it by being disinterested, or I kill it by being too interested. And these days I have the cool combination of seeming disinterested when I'm really interested.
    Man, this is exactly me. Word for word.


    Er, I mean....


    Greener pastures!!

  4. #14
    almost half a doctor phoenix13's Avatar
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    Being in love sucks. Everything is more intense. All the overanalyzing, overreacting, over-everything is much worse. I've turned self-restraint into an art form... and I still look insane!

    Interestingly, the 2 times I've fallen in love, it took me a loooooong time to realize/ admit to myself that I'd fallen. The first took me approx. 3 years (no joke). The second took approx. 3 months (improvement ).

    Oh, and being loved makes the being in love waaaaaay less lame.

    "OMG I FEEEEEEEEEL SO INTENSELY ABOUT EVERYTHING OMG OMG OMG GET ME A XANAX" -Priam (ENFP impersonation)

  5. #15
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by noigmn View Post
    No idea, felt it, but never really gone that far. I'm decently avoidative. And a pain in the ass to get close to emotionally.

    Normally I kill it by being disinterested, or I kill it by being too interested. And these days I have the cool combination of seeming disinterested when I'm really interested.
    This is so true for me. If I like you I either dont talk to you, or get so over infatuated I just seem to be nuts.

    I think perhaps I was like a comet that recently swung just a wee to close to the black hole of love. A little bit of me started to get sucked down in that gaping clusterfuck. I ran like hell, but it pulled and pulled. I finally broke free, but that is some seriously scary, bad shit. Stay away!

    Way too many emotions get dragged to the surface and I turn into a moron. A totally crazy stalker stupid moron. god that sucks.

    Relationships may just be out of the question. All that stuff between saying hi and getting naked really confuses me. Once naked, I am okay and can manage.

    How does an extroverted person, enfp, avoid getting sucked into the "object" of interest? How can you remain detached and reasonable? So far I just dont engage much.

  6. #16

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    Me not being able to form a decent sentence is the best way to know if I like you. As you said though, it's not like I'm not going to be insanely fun and be some sort of liability once you get past that stage, it is just getting past there. I can't ever detach for long enough to be comfortable. Or others probably can't attach for long enough comfortably. I've never got any expectation of them to though. It's just if I'm there I give it my all.

    On how to avoid it. I think the answer is don't. We adapt too much naturally. Be yourself and learn to fall. If they like it, they'll like it, if they think you are a freak, so be it. Most people have trouble permanently thinking you are a freak. Especially as ENFP. The minute you walk off and find interest in something new they see all the ENFPness and start chasing you again.

    Though sometimes this creates one of those annoying cycles of, "oh, you have a brain and emotions, argh!", "wow, now you're simple and fun and brainless and uncomplicated, maybe I can lock you in that state, I might chase again and try".
    Freude, schöner Götterfunken Tochter aus Elysium, Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, dein Heiligtum! Deine Zauber binden wieder Was die Mode streng geteilt; Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.

  7. #17
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by noigmn View Post
    On how to avoid it. I think the answer is don't. We adapt too much naturally. Be yourself and learn to fall. If they like it, they'll like it, if they think you are a freak, so be it. Most people have trouble permanently thinking you are a freak. Especially as ENFP. The minute you walk off and find interest in something new they see all the ENFPness and start chasing you again.".


    My coworkers know me well!! They love the craziness, especially the SJs and say I make meetings fun with my craziness. They all complain of how quiet the building is when I am not there. I am like a well loved puppy in thw workplace and I can encourage them and give them enthusiasm. They accept the ups and downs and spacticity and I feel like I can be open with them. An observer recently said I am the "hero" of the group.

    However all of that exposed to some new person looks a bit overwhelming and crazy. I renounce men> for this week anyways>

  8. #18
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by noigmn View Post
    Me not being able to form a decent sentence is the best way to know if I like you. As you said though, it's not like I'm not going to be insanely fun and be some sort of liability once you get past that stage, it is just getting past there.
    This is me too.

    For me it's like I can't work my ENFP magic anymore until I know I'm accepted. I go from knowing no boundaries to tiptoeing throw conversations. Plus I start being nice, which I hate.

  9. #19
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    me too...i turn shy for a bit before...it's awful.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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