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  1. #21
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    One told me "I do what I want, when I want, that's just who I am. Why can't you just accept this about me?"
    That is rather exasperating and is a position that doesn't allow for a healthy relationship with anyone. It sounds like someone never got a spanking.

    I guess in a way accepting it goes along with minimizing or eliminating the relationship. I wonder how that person responds to another person who takes the same position, like "when you talk like that my natural response is to want to end the friendship now, so should I also do what I want when I want?"
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  2. #22
    movin melodies kiddykat's Avatar
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    ^I think at that point, it's about self-preservation..

    To maintain a sense of peace, acceptance.. sorta like the death/dying process. DABDA (Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance)?

    if things get abusive (verbal, emotional/or physical), then I think it's necessary to keep distance, slam door (doesn't mean we can't leave a peep open, for forgiveness), right?

    Edit: As an NF, letting go is sometimes, the hardest thing I have to do when I really care about someone.

  3. #23
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viv View Post
    Edit: As an NF, letting go is sometimes, the hardest thing I have to do when I really care about someone.
    A part of me is wondering if there is a type unlikely to do a door slam. I think most people get fed up with certain others and end relationships. This thread brings it to mind because FPs would naturally be seen as less likely than average to do it, so if there are many who identify with it, perhaps it is something most everyone actually does. Maybe a new thread would be interesting.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  4. #24
    movin melodies kiddykat's Avatar
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    *Knock Knock* Door open? (No Pun intended)

    When we get into relationships where we do get cheated, hurt (physically, emotionally, attacked, all of the horrible elements one cannot imagine), we door slam, so we can learn, bc that's where it hurts most? I think perhaps, it's a human thing.. And, that is where I think compatibility is important (personality + values) that generates a sense of understanding so that we *grow* as individuals. When we're around those who bring out the best of us, the more likely the positive the outcome, the more self-actualized we are? I find this discussion really interesting.. Maybe some deal with it better than others (so it seems)? Maybe we need a new thread?

    Thx 4 the interesting topic, Heart! *blush*

    P.S.- I also think intentions are important, bc it determines whether or not the communication loop works? I see it as the driving force for human behavior (including relationships, politics etc).

  5. #25
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    The door does not open easily, and once someone is in I am very loyal and will try and see the best in them and be forgiving. I rarely hold grudges after arguments & will try and be compassionate towards behavior I don't even agree with. So when I door slam, it is for good reason.

    Most recently it was with a male friend (who I suspect is an INTP, and a very unhealthy one at that) who would get extremely belligerent at times. It started to become verbal abuse, and escalated to the point of him calling me a "stupid c**t", among other things. At that, I completely cut off all contact with him. Being the cold jerk he is, he has not tried to resume contact either.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  6. #26
    Junior Member Meadow's Avatar
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    I haven't ever given the doorslam in the 2 romantic relationships I've had but I've done it many times with friends in the past.

  7. #27
    A window to the soul
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    Red face Door Slam...

    Yes. Never tell me you love me on the first date.

  8. #28
    Senior Member Kastor's Avatar
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    I'm more apt to throwing things in my room than slamming the door LOL
    [SIGPIC]http://i206.photobucket.com/albums/bb37/KamikazePigeonOnFire/untitled-39.jpg[/SIGPIC]

  9. #29
    Senior Member One Day's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by perfectgirl View Post
    Yes. Never tell me you love me on the first date.
    Funny you say that. There was a thread a while ago about INFP males doing just that (or something similar to it).

  10. #30
    Member colma's Avatar
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    *Gulp*

    .... guilty.

    God damn feelings overwhelming logic.

    EDIT: Laughs at self... at least its a mistake you only make once.


    INFP 4w5 sp/so
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    "At government, you think you're clever: You govern beasts — but humans
    never." - Estienne de La Boetie

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