I am very concerned for my close ENFP friend. For the past few years she's been becomming progressively more reckless and careless. For example, I was pissed last night because she had an affair with a married man who's only defense was, "Oh my wife knows about it." Then ended up sharing a bed with someone else who she's only seen twice in her life and about 30 years older. Also in that same night she popped some unknown pill that some random guy gave her. God, I wanted to smack her! I'm extrememly frustrated with her in that she chooses to put herself in harms way. Instead of saving up the money to see a doctor about her insomnia problems she used to wrap a cloth around her head until she passed out. I can understand when money is tight but that is just plain STUPID. I've tried suggesting many ways to help her problems but she rides off my advice before she even tries it. Sometimes if I suggest her something she will do the opposite just to spite me. (She calls it an impulse to do the opposite.)
Last summer I got a frightening call from her mother telling me that she had gone missing. At the time I was living over a thousand miles away but I dropped everything I was doing and drove cross country to go find her. Turns out she had been staying with some guy in dumpy motel who claimed to be a millionaire and had theoretically bought her a brand new car, a motorcycle, and was planning to take her on a trip to Europe. I ain't making this shit up!
I feel like I've had to put my life on hold for her.
Now I've expressed my worries to her on numerous occasions. She usually replies with, "Well I don't care enough about myself [to seek help]." "How do you expect me to do it when I'm broke. It's easier to do it this way." "You don't understand how I work. It's fine for me to do it [a harmful way] because it doesn't bother me." "You don't understand my situation. You don't know what it's like..." "I know what I'm doing. I've done this so many times." When I argue about the stress she is causing me she says, "Don't be so selfish." "I'm a big girl. I can look out for myself." "I'm not your responsibility."
I've known this person since elementry school and she is like a sister to me. She is actually a very smart girl but she does the stupidest things. I understand that she is an adult and needs to make her own decisions in life but I'll be damned if I find her laying dead in a gutter. There is a part of me that feels OBLIGATED to intervene.
Keep in mind that although I'm seeking advice, I'm also venting.