User Tag List

First 12

Results 11 to 15 of 15

  1. #11
    Senior Member Xellotath's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Socionics
    IEE
    Posts
    181

    Default

    ... I dated one for 6 months.

    Painful experience. That's when I learned that given enough time I'll fall in love with anything. It's called over-idealizing someone. I assume NFs are susceptible to this.

    It's as if everything this person did was for the immediate and never wanted anything even remotely meaningful.

    I -completely- relate to your post. It does feel like it is our fault because we're the ones with need for something more, while the other person seemed perfectly content with the way things are. Just like you I got the feeling that it somehow could have worked out... everything was so much fun in the beginning why couldn't it stay that way?

    Time heals most wounds... but in the meantime..

  2. #12
    Senior Member Rachelinpa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Socionics
    ENFp
    Posts
    878

    Default

    I dated one for 6 months also. He was very good to me, kind and stable, which is why I was initially attracted. I agree that it was "so much fun the beginning," but I think that's because it was new and I thought it had to change. Eventually, I realized it wasn't going to and became bored. Nobody's fault, but I felt like I had reached the bottom of the barrel. A VERY NICE end of the road, but completely understimulating.

    Perhaps this is an especially bad combination because we are always seeking the possibilities. And while the ISFP may be willing to go along with our adventures, they are not constantly seeking the new as we are.

  3. #13
    Was E.laur Laurie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    7w6
    Socionics
    ENFp
    Posts
    6,075

    Default

    Sounds just like a bad idea to me.

  4. #14
    Member hakuna's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    4
    Socionics
    INFP
    Posts
    32

    Default

    As I am not an ENFP or ISFP (even though I'm one letter away from both, ha!) I have never experienced a relationship of this sort firsthand. I have two friends of these types that will have been together for 2 years in a few months. They're close and very cute together, but their relationship has had it's rough patches. From what I can figure out, Fi brings them closer than ever at the good times but can sometimes cause a rift when both have very strong feelings about an argument or misunderstanding, which is usually then reconciled because of Fi.

    My ENFP friend was initially attracted to the ISFP because of his kindness and the ISFP was attracted to the ENFP because she's unbelievably awesome. The ENFP loves to debate about ideas and theories that are important to her which the ISFP finds worthwhile and can relate, but isn't always able to reciprocate the enthusiasm that my ENFP friend wishes. She NEEDS to relate to people on this level. The Idealist vs Hedonist dichotomy can sometimes cause problems as the ENFP is looking for something more than temporary euphoria and can feel unfulfilled. The biggest problem that they've had is when the ISFP neglects to tell the ENFP the truth or falls through on a promise.

    I'm not sure if that's what you were looking for, but I figured another real life account wouldn't hurt.

    I guess you just needed some "N" in your life. I can't blame you... I need "N" too.

  5. #15
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    246

    Default

    ^^ thanks for sharing, Hakuna! -your response was what i was looking for . . . made me feel better. I definitely have decided that I REQUIRE 'N' now in a significant other . . . I just need to keep reminding myself that I didn't know this / understand this when I was younger & forgive myself. Also, my ISFP found my desire to debate about abstract ideas and theories stomachable up to a point & then he would grow very bored (eyes glazed over) & over time he got comfortable enough to tell me that whatever I was going on & on about was "boring him" and this hurt me to the core.

Similar Threads

  1. [ENFP] anyone here in an ENFP / INFJ couplehood ?
    By revolve in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 11-05-2010, 08:39 PM
  2. [MBTItm] ISFPs/ENFPs
    By sculpting in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 12-11-2009, 08:25 PM
  3. [ENFP] ISFP Dislikes ENFPs
    By FlamingMask in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 07-24-2009, 04:04 PM
  4. [ENFP] need advice: ENFP girl and ISFP male friend
    By Peace in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 07-06-2009, 07:43 AM
  5. [ENFP] Was my dad an ENFP or ISFP??
    By BookLady in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: 06-19-2008, 10:15 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO