As of late my relationship with my ENFP mom has been going downhill.
It all started last Christmas. She has always felt neglected by her family (she is the black sheep) and she has always talked to me about it. This is for every holiday since I could talk. She doesn't have anyone else but me to talk to, she got a divorce with my dad when I was 2.
So anyways. Last Christmas I got sick and tired of hearing it. When I get annoyed I will generally act rude if the person will not stop being annoying.
My mom doesn't exactly understand introverts. In my opinion if there isn't anything to talk about then nothing should really be said. Well my mom likes to talk... and talk...and talk about either her family or her place of work. That is all she will talk about, nothing else.
One thing that really annoys me is when someone just won't shut up about something that I've heard a million times. This is why I often don't watch the news, all they can talk about is one specific event for a month. My mom will not talk about anything else other than that.
So we eventually started to argue. She thinks that I don't love her because I won't carry on a conversation. She doesn't listen to me at all, and she basically just drowns out what I say when I try to talk. I keep trying to tell her that if there was something to talk about then I would want to talk, but that I didn't want to talk about the same thing every time I see her (which is every weekend), and from this she thinks that I don't love her because I don't want to talk.
I don't understand why she feels this way... My dad (ISTP) and I seem to not care if we don't talk for two hours every day over the week. If there is something new that comes up, we will talk. If there isn't anything to talk about, we will just be friendly and speak what's on our mind when we eat together. We both realize that we still love each other, it's not an issue at all. Yet my mom thinks I don't love her.
This just seems like a huge over-reaction on her part. I do love my mom, but I don't think that I should be her best friend. A parent-child relationship is different than other relationships. It isn't too personal.
Can anyone provide insight as to what I should do? I've tried everything I think. When I try to talk it over with her and explain what I did right now, she gets mad and lists all these things that she finds flawed about me, and basically how I'm supposed to be her maid because she is my parent. I will not have anything to do with that. Whenever I reason with her, she just gets mad. I have no idea what I should do about this. Can an ENFP with kids please tell me about their relationships, or maybe someone else with an ENFP parent? I would like some help, thanks.