[MBTI General] Mind rigid woman

[entropie]

I just wanted to say at this point that I mind mind rigid woman right now. I have come to understand that most Fs do think different and that it is an adventure and a honour to be invited on the journey. But that rigidness and close mindedness I have to endure in this life every day and day and day, really is no fun.

I am just in a chat where I get dissed the whole time and I dont now why. The only explanation I have is because they are so unhappy. So I tried to bring happiness in any way but that is not possible. They are unhappy because they are unhappy. And they dont mind changing that...

*tilt*

 

[heart]

What were they being rigid on you about?

 

[entropie]

Nothing really that's the story. It never came to be being rigid about anything. They just were from the start. By factory design. What am I supposed to do ? How am I supposed to survive this ?

Shall I admit they are right the whole time. I am about to reach the point where I cant do this any longer...

What the fuck is gpoing on with this people ? They are rich, have food, cars all they want and they search for someone to be close to. But on the other hand they are so rigid and abrasive that this is never gonna happen.

Life cant be just like a puzzle, waiting for the right part to fit. How will you ever now if it is the right part, if you blocked everything from the start and have nothing to compare to. Or if you make your first experience the everlasting one ?

Man I tell you, some stupidity sucks big time. I will never get along with that gamma quadra people.

 

[Apollanaut]

It's most likely some kind of self-defensive behaviour. If that's true, then the more you press the issue, the more rigid and abrasive they'll become. If that's what's happening, I recommend you back off for a while and let them make the next move.

 

[entropie]

Hmm..

 

[heart]

What the fuck is gpoing on with this people ? They are rich, have food, cars all they want and they search for someone to be close to. But on the other hand they are so rigid and abrasive that this is never gonna happen.

Life cant be just like a puzzle, waiting for the right part to fit. How will you ever now if it is the right part, if you blocked everything from the start and have nothing to compare to. Or if you make your first experience the everlasting one ?

I don't get this either about modern people. We live more secure and comfortable than people have ever lived (that we know of) and yet people are more encased in fear than ever.

 

[entropie]

It's most likely some kind of self-defensive behaviour. If that's true, then the more you press the issue, the more rigid and abrasive they'll become. If that's what's happening, I recommend you back off for a while and let them make the next move.

Now you have made me look like an idiot, thanks for that .

But its ok, I was never talking about woman being cautious. I was talking about woman being rigid in their own world not open for other perspectives. Men who are that way I can deal with, with woman I cannot. Guess my education fails me on this one.

 

[heart]

I was talking about woman being rigid in their own world not open for other perspectives. Men who are that way I can deal with, with woman I cannot. Guess my education fails me on this one.

That's an interesting perspective. Sounds more like this:

The male personification of the unconscious in woman -- the animus -- exhibits both good and bad aspects, as does the anima in man. But the animus does not so often appear in the form of an erotic fantasy or mood [like the anima]; it is more apt to take the form of a hidden "sacred" conviction.

When such a conviction is preached with a loud, insistent, masculine voice or imposed on others by means of brutal emotional scenes, the underlying masculinity in a woman is easily recognized. However, even in a woman who is outwardly very feminine the animus can be an equally hard, inexorable power.

One may suddenly find oneself up against something in a woman that is obstinate and cold.

Marie Louise von Franz

 

[entropie]

I wont believe that. There are woman which Animus is higly sexually motivated. Besides that, though I do not come off that way on word basis, I am not loud and masculine. I dont force things on people on the contrary thats my problem.

I always nod and wave. I only let the devil out with you.

I would let it out with that girl who bugged me also. But before I can do that I need to find the right words, which I had found. And to tell her the right words means to change her. And I have made a REALLY bad experience with my ability to influence people.

I just want to communicate with her on a neutral basis, open for suggestions. I dont get angry often, but if someone you havent even talked to approaches you from the start in a way of "I dont want to know", its hard to cope with.

Its very german in the end I have the same attitude to say "I dont want to know"

 

[heart]

I wont believe that. There are woman which Animus is higly sexually motivated. Besides that, though I do not come off that way on word basis, I am not loud and masculine. I dont force things on people on the contrary thats my problem.

I always nod and wave. I only let the devil out with you.

It wasn't meaning the man is that way, it means the animus within the woman is that way because she hasn't yet learned how to tame it. And it is not talking about all women, just those for whom the animus is either negative or unsconscious.

The negative animus is marked by the rigid keeping of smug, insignifigant opinions on things that don't even really matter that much.

 

[Moiety]

Just let her realize you don't really care about her rigidness. If you are morally superior you don't have to get upset about it. Are we talking forced socialization here?

 

[entropie]

I dont know really but thanks for your input. I guess my wisdom is just to young to be shared, I am still missing a lot of things, like to understand the Feelers view on life.

I am hoping to come one day to the point, when those things dont bug you, but you have got an explanation at hand. Nowadays its more like a hunch of what is wrong or an intuition that connects dots and turns out negative in comparison.

I value your insights and I am glad that I have you. I dont take the things I have for granted and to face the facts I wouldnt know where I were now, if it werent for people who actually know that funding art museums with taxes is important.

 

[heart]

I am confused. Is this about some strange women in chat or about a GF?

 

[entropie]

Basically this is about understanding. If I start ramblings I only want to find consensus, so I can think that I am not mad. That's all. Everything beyond that I think is too private to be shared.

 

[entropie]

They just voted in the "DO ISFJ act selfishly" thread that they do. See that is the consensus I need. Not because I feel better afterwards because I said something that does make other people feel worse, but because I said something that made me feel better !

 

[heart]

Basically this is about understanding. If I start ramblings I only want to find consensus, so I can think that I am not mad. That's all. Everything beyond that I think is too private to be shared.

I dig.

 

[entropie]

Ok thanks

 

[IrishStallion819]

What were they being rigid on you about?

Nothing really that's the story

Sometimes, We think its truly nothing but its really "something". One thing that can turn a persons world upsidedown, to another, would just seem totally stupid and they gett the impressions that their overracting.. Which this could most definetly be the case, in overracting to nothing. But just as you want her to be openminded about other perspectives, you must be openminded in her respons to "why" shes rigid. I encourage you to ask her why shes the way she is and what you could possibly do to help make it better. Most people dont' ask or tell how things can be better and therefore they hold alot of bitter and resentful feelings inside.

 

[entropie]

Thank you that was really nice

 

[Paisley]

Dissed in a chat room hey? Usually people are in those chat rooms just to let off steam, and what's said isn't an accurate description of who they are. If they are unhappy, then someone simply needs to meet them where they are at in life. Throwing a bridle on them and trying to steer them in a positive direction, is usually met with little success. I suggest patience and caution before listening to irishstallion819's advice. If you can sense some form of unhappiness and rigidity, define. What is the character of it? How is it expressed? Where does the hatred towards you, seemingly come from? What has or hasn't been said, on all sides? What is their upbringing? Are their any impartial objective witnesses to corroborate what you see and feel?

Entropie, if you could give me a play by play of this rigid behaviour, I'd be happy to "life coach" you through some possible ways of coping. So far I really can't answer authoritatively on this form of rigidity. Is it stubborness, border lining on insanity, in the form of doing the same wrong thing, expecting a different result, over and over again, where no one is getting anywhere and things need to change? Or is it, a rigidity of simply being set in ones ways, and unopen to any response? If so, define. I need a context to make the leap from the hatred to unhappiness to rigidity.

My hands are tied with this one.