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Thread: infp mind set

  1. #31
    Senor Membrane
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    Quote Originally Posted by Frank View Post
    I'm being completely genuine on this. The inquiry is in part to understand my friends better and also to better understand fi as it is supposedly my 4th function and a definite weakness. Also my uncle, who is probably one of the neatest people I know is an infp, yet he seems to be a little suspicious also of personal inquiries and will often shy away from philosophical conversations. I find this to be a shame because you can just tell that he is full of insights and practical wisdom.
    I select my philosophees pretty carefully in real life. I choose my trustees even more carefully.

  2. #32
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    @Frank

    Well, I don't understand that, myself. I always consider a well-timed question to be a compliment. So I can't help you there.

    Bad experiences in the past?
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  3. #33
    Senior Member sciski's Avatar
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    My cunning plan to make an INFP lose their temper is to sit them down and small talk with them for 5 solid hours, insist that they answer all questions in minute detail and interrupt them mid-answer with, "I don't get it. You're not making any sense. You're gonna have to rephrase that".

    Unfortunately, being a fellow introvert, I would explode messily after the first hour.

    *graciously accepts the kick from Anja* Piquant, with a hint of spice!

  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by Anja View Post
    @Frank

    Well, I don't understand that, myself. I always consider a well-timed question to be a compliment. So I can't help you there.

    Bad experiences in the past?

    None between us. In fact we've always had a "connection". Possibly the N thing. There is however a certain point of self disclosure that he just won't cross. I think though that one of his sisters is an entj and from what I can tell she was a manipulative and controlling bitch growing up. Their relationship is strained to this day. I sure hope he doesn't think I have the potential to belittle him like she did.

  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Frank View Post
    None between us. In fact we've always had a "connection". Possibly the N thing. There is however a certain point of self disclosure that he just won't cross.
    I have crossed that line a few times and almost every time regretted it later on. I know I should cross it, though.

  6. #36
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    Speaking just for myself, I haven't attributed anything nefarious to his query. It's just that I don't see why he needs seperate answers here, INFP's have show what sets them off here all the time. He'd get a more rounded, objective view by studying the posts and blogs anyway.

    Like I am going to take time out of my personal schedule to write an essay on what makes me tick for someone I have no personal connection to? Yeah, probably not. I have better (more urgent) things to exhaust my limited T energy on but it's no slam against Frank here.

    Frank, you'd probably get better answers in a one-on-one form of contact.

  7. #37
    Seriously Delirious Udog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Frank View Post
    I'm being completely genuine on this. The inquiry is in part to understand my friends better and also to better understand fi as it is supposedly my 4th function and a definite weakness. Also my uncle, who is probably one of the neatest people I know is an infp, yet he seems to be a little suspicious also of personal inquiries and will often shy away from philosophical conversations. I find this to be a shame because you can just tell that he is full of insights and practical wisdom.
    Part of it is our philosophies really cut into our core, so when we share them we can become very vulnerable. I'll debate my philosophies in constructive manners, but as soon as someone becomes more interested in 'winning' than exchanging ideas I close down. There are just some things I won't talk about if I get the impression someone is overly concerned about being 'right' and winning arguments.

    To answer your first question, I get angry when someone pushes me too far. A realistic way of doing that is to take advantage of my generosity and my time on a consistent basis, but be unavailable or unsympathetic when I finally need you. It's only in the past year or so that I've really started working on being more assertive before someone pushes me to the brink, as no one wins when I get pushed too far.

  8. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Udog View Post
    Part of it is our philosophies really cut into our core, so when we share them we can become very vulnerable. I'll debate my philosophies in constructive manners, but as soon as someone becomes more interested in 'winning' than exchanging ideas I close down. There are just some things I won't talk about if I get the impression someone is overly concerned about being 'right' and winning arguments.
    Yeah, the INFP view on philosophy might be quite different than to the other types. The reason I would restrain myself of discussing my philosophy with an NT, for example, is that some of them treat it only as a game of concepts. This is devaluing the philosophy, and I guess I think of it as devaluing me at the same time.

    I do treat many things as games of concepts myself, but it is a lot harder to do when you believe in it.

  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Frank View Post
    Also, if you have it articulated in your head, could you give your general philosophy towards other people?
    I think people should be treated equally and respected in the same way in all cases. If I don't see someone being treated equally I'll get mad and usually defend the underdog. If I'm the victim of being treated unequally, well needless to say you've got a 5 second head start to start running. The only time I think someone shouldn't be treated equally is when someone does a crime against humanity, such as murder, rape, stealing, lying with a bad intent etc.

    Those things are those that I strive to avoid. Crimes against humanity and intolerance. I'm pretty sure this goes for all INFPs.

    There's a bunch of other principals that I live by, but they are random and only have to do with myself and I highly doubt another INFP would feel the same way on the issues that I have principals toward. An example of this is that I really hate to see people in a romantic relationship, it makes me feel like crap. This comes from the fact that I've been through a good bit of rejection. Most if not all INFPs will have random things like this that they hate, that they usually cannot put into words until they get it straight in their mind. For about a year or two I would absolutely hate to see people like that and I would never know why, but after a good bit of thinking and talking to friends about it I realized this.

    Most people don't really "get" me except for other NFs, it's cool that you are making the effort to understand your friends.

    Let's see, what gets me on my aggressive side. I hate senseless argueing. There is no purpose to it and just causes conflict. I generally hate it when people won't leave me alone, but that's an introvert thing I'm pretty sure. I hate it when people don't appreciate something I've done for them, I really like being thanked. This shows up a lot in my life, I get passive-aggressive simply because my friends/family won't thank me. I brought the issue up with them and (even though they think I'm beyond weird about that) they thank me, even if it seems forced it's better than nothing. Another thing that gets me off is what I said above, the whole intolerance thing and crimes against humanity.

    Us INFPs are easy to get on your good side, and also easy to get on your bad side. I hope I helped with my post.

    @Solitary Walker: You can't just stereotype an entire personality type, that just doesn't work. Come on now.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  10. #40
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    Definitely helpful blackcat. Thank you. When it comes to people I prefer not to just observe as sw suggested. Too much room for error. If some individuals are nice enough to offer their insight and I can compare it with what I think I observed, than some real progress can be made. I appreciate all of the posts guys. Thanks

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