[NF] NFs: is 'money' really secondary to you?

[niki]

i want to conduct a survey here.
and it's not only money, but also talking in terms of the money-success (ie: rich), which seems to be the 'mainstream'-type of success that is encouraged by our large society forever.

is money (& money-success) a secondary thing to you?

if yes, then what would be the primary thing for you?
as for me, i would say: happiness in life.
but that's exactly why i'm conducting a survey here, to see if there's any NFs who'd prefer money (being primary) over happiness (secondary), or similarly, money over everything else, or not?

 

[AfterHours]

If I'm unhappy, it really won't matter how much money I have. I wouldn't consider it at all except that apparently it's become necessary to human survival.
My primary goal is to live life.

 

[tibby]

As in all materialistic means and the "status" you can achieve with you success don't interest me. I want to make enough money so that I don't have to struggle everyday.

Money and "mainstream success" are secondary things for me.

Primary things for me are (sadly) humanitarian causes. Sadly, because I don't know how to actualize it. I know the only way for me to get satisfaction is by doing something "meaningful" and important for the humanity; I want to do as much as I possibly can for some cause that I find important.

It also goes with my other relationships. I get satisfaction from helping others to reach their potential and help them to become what ever they want to be. I kind of feel bad because I feel it's my second primary thing, even though close relationships are v. important for me. All in all, my primary things concern THE PEOPLE, as individuals close to me as well as humanity. I want to contribute their lives, self-growth, and holistic "happiness"; whether is psychological, spiritual, personal or physical. (And of course, I want to find my "soulmate").

 

[Little Linguist]

Well, damn, money *is* important - I mean, if I were homeless, cold and hungry, that would really suck.

On the other hand, I can have billions of euros, but if I am unhappy, discontent with myself and my surroundings and unhealthy - all that money is about as interesting as a f*ing football game. (And I hate football).

So the bottom line is: Yes, money is important, but it is definitely not the MOST important thing. I would say the most important things are:

1. Personal health (If I'm dead, nothing else matters, because I'm dead - and if I'm unhealthy, I can't enjoy anything else.)
2. Personal relationships (What's the point in being healthy and having money if I'm all alone? marriage, family, friends, acquaintances and co-workers, etc.)
3. Personal self-fulfillment (I need to have purpose and goals, or else I feel lost and alone, even if I am surrounded by people and have money and shit).
4. Personal achievement and development (Money, power, success, good career, learning new skills and all that good crap blah blah).
5. My animals (which kind of fits in with 2 and 3)
6. My hobbies (fits in 2 and 3)
7. Whatever else floats my boat at any given time.

So what does that make me - the first or second option?

 

[BerberElla]

I think about money all the time, I just don't value it as highly as I should do. After all money makes the world go round, and I'd much rather have it to spare, than have none.

All the money in the world can't make you happy, but it's a damn good stepping stone, because without it there will be even more to make you miserable.

 

[Little Linguist]

I think about money all the time, I just don't value it as highly as I should do. After all money makes the world go round, and I'd much rather have it to spare, than have none.

All the money in the world can't make you happy, but it's a damn good stepping stone, because without it there will be even more to make you miserable.

Exactly. You are very right, and that is what I was trying to say

 

[cherchair]

NFs: is 'money' really secondary to you?

The few months that I had money and money-related status as a corporate attorney were the most miserable in my life. The work I did was meaningless to me and left little time and energy for the things in my life that count with me: developing relationships, especially those with my children; exploring the world of ideas beyond the narrow confines of the law as it was practiced at the firm where I worked. I might have been happier had I chosen work in the public sector, say, children's law or civil rights law, but I'll never know. The CVA that permanently disabled me came along and changed everything.

That was almost 17 years ago and since then I have lived at or near the poverty level and been much happier. Though financially life has been a struggle, I have had the opportunity to pursue avenues that are meaningful to me: working in the disability-rights movement, working with children in inner-city schools, writing, raising my children...the list goes on. I always told my children to do what they loved and not to worry about the money and both (one an NF, the other an SJ) have adopted this value, which is very satisfying, especially since their father's values are strictly materialistic and he judges everything in terms of money and money-related "success." Both my sons are happier men than their father can ever hope to be, at least in my estimation. Living life to the fullest is much more important to me than money or status will ever be.

 

[Amargith]

I don't mind having money, but its not my primary drive

For me, my SO, my animals, my friends, my health and the gathering of knowledge and intense experiences are all ten times more important. Now...money is a tool to get to some of those things so therefore it does become somewhat important and a necessary evil. And of course I do occasionally, like most women, love the idea of going on a shopping spree..but I can do without if needed

 

[Nonsensical]

Sure, money is almost vital in today's world, so it's natural to want it, and think about it. But in all honesty, I value higher than money, especially ones I love.

 

[Chris_in_Orbit]

if yes, then what would be the primary thing for you?
as for me, i would say: happiness in life.
but that's exactly why i'm conducting a survey here, to see if there's any NFs who'd prefer money (being primary) over happiness (secondary), or similarly, money over everything else, or not?

I think happiness in life is the primary goal of just about any individual. Some people think that they can achieve that by getting lots of money.

 

[Gauche]

 

[dee]

It is actually something that I am always thinking about, it drives me crazy. The thing is, the way I see it, in order to do a lot of the things you want to do, for example: travel, learn, do fun stuff like scuba dive etc. you need money. So money is important to me in order to get the things I want.
I guess I just want a lot of stuff

But if I had money, and it wasn't an issue, i.e I could pay my bills and have time to do meaningful stuff, I would definately not kill myself to just gain more money etc.

I wish I didn't care about money at all, so that I could just be free, and do what I feel is right, but I think the "j" in me makes me be too damned responsible for any of that...

 

[eclare]

It is actually something that I am always thinking about, it drives me crazy. The thing is, the way I see it, in order to do a lot of the things you want to do, for example: travel, learn, do fun stuff like scuba dive etc. you need money. So money is important to me in order to get the things I want.
I guess I just want a lot of stuff

But if I had money, and it wasn't an issue, i.e I could pay my bills and have time to do meaningful stuff, I would definately not kill myself to just gain more money etc.

I wish I didn't care about money at all, so that I could just be free, and do what I feel is right, but I think the "j" in me makes me be too damned responsible for any of that...

Total word! Money is useful only for its usefulness. Having it allows me to experience some things that I otherwise wouldn't be able to, and I value that aspect of it. Also, when I don't have money I worry about it constantly.

Honestly, my preferred state is to not have to think about it. I work so that I can do other things. I have no idea where most of my money goes most of the time (soooo typically INFJ in that I am terrible at managing my money) so that means that I have to earn enough to make sure it's there.

Also, money allows me to be generous - it's not the be all and end all and of course there are plenty of ways to show friends and family how much I love them, but it's also satisfying to be able to surprise a stressed out friend with a nice meal or a manicure or something completely frivolous.

 

[penelope]

beyond necessity, I don't obsess over it.

 

[Lady_X]

i don't think about "it" much at all...but it's nice to have a lil to do stuff with. i like to do stuff and i don't like to worry...but i don't care about having more then i need....and if i have extra i'll give it to someone who needs it more...i don't care...it comes and goes...life is about experiences not how much you can accumulate, you know?

----------------
Now playing: The Kooks - Do You Wanna
via FoxyTunes

 

[EcK]

i don't think about "it" much at all...but it's nice to have a lil to do stuff with. i like to do stuff and i don't like to worry...but i don't care about having more then i need....and if i have extra i'll give it to someone who needs it more...i don't care...it comes and goes...life is about experiences not how much you can accumulate, you know?

----------------
Now playing: The Kooks - Do You Wanna
via FoxyTunes

That's not what you said last time you stole my wallet

 

[anii]

I think it depends on your age. In my 20s, No. In my 40s, hell Yes.

 

[Cimarron]

Total word! Money is useful only for its usefulness.

Also, money allows me to be generous...

Yup, this is my line of thinking. I don't think any principles are compromised, as long as you keep things in perspective.

 

[runvardh]

Money is a means to and end. That said, survival in modern society requires it so it is still high on my list for that reason. Put me in a situation where I don't need it for food, shelter, heat, clothing, and taxes it will quickly lose it's importance.

 

[niki]

yeah, i do agree with what most of you said, that money should only be used as a 'tool'/means, not an end/goal.
but alas! have you guys ever seen or observed the irony: most money-making jobs are usually:
1. very 'corporate' & 'constrained' culture/atmosphere
2. require damn long hours , even work overtime & sleepless nights (!)

i guess luckily, there're some great books that show the 'alternative' , ie: you can still make lots of money, but work less, and enjoy more life.
for example, have any of you guys read "4 Hours Work Week" by Tim Ferris ?
it teaches about being an Enterpreneur, but the 'modern' kind of enterpreneur, where Life-enjoyment is the number one priority, over big & large corporations & money & title.
I think it's quite a good (& cool) book, and i can relate with a lot of the author's philosophy about work & life.

I don't know,..but seriously, can you guys honestly stand it, if you were put in high money-making jobs with those two characteristics above?... or rather live 'enough' or even on the edge of poverty, just to avoid those two factors?