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[MBTI General] Opposites attract?

Ardea

o edward cullen!
Joined
Dec 3, 2008
Messages
729
MBTI Type
enfp
Enneagram
7
I guess you could say that, but only if you considered verbal abuse flirtatious. You sick fuck.

Sometimes it is... sometimes it is... you knew that, though...
 

Lightyear

New member
Joined
Jul 3, 2008
Messages
899
I tend to be attracted to Is if there is a certain aura of depth around them. If I feel I can figure someone out within half an hour of knowing them they bore me already and I don't want to get to know them any closer.

I am also attracted to Es but only as long as I feel they are also interested in me and are not just trying to talk me insane. If there is some depth and good craziness behind the loud exterior I am interested.

I have also been wondering: What does an I get out of a conversation with an E? I like it if I don't have to talk all the time but can ask the questions instead but I feel immensely drained and irritated if the E isn't interested in me and just goes on and on talking.
 

ajblaise

Minister of Propagandhi
Joined
Aug 3, 2008
Messages
7,914
MBTI Type
INTP
I think people generally look to have their good qualities matched and the qualities in which they are lacking to be balanced, by their partner.

So if someone finds fault with their introversion or extroversion (too shy, can't initiate / can't introspect, annoys people) they might be more likely to be attracted to someone who balances them out. While someone who is comfortable and doesn't find fault with their E/I might have less of a "opposites attract" feeling in this regard.

I find that I'm attracted to introverts most often, and also extroverts who have a strong N.
 

Synarch

Once Was
Joined
Oct 14, 2008
Messages
8,445
MBTI Type
ENTP
I have also been wondering: What does an I get out of a conversation with an E? I like it if I don't have to talk all the time but can ask the questions instead but I feel immensely drained and irritated if the E isn't interested in me and just goes on and on talking.

Yes. Many introverts love when you bring your full attention to bear on them and burn them with your lasers, drying to drill into their gooey, dark interiors. It is like a little game of whack-a-mole. They want to connect, but they want to keep you out of certain rooms and cupboards. Of course, I like just throwing all the doors open and seeing what scatters.
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Introverts have mouse poop?
 

FantailedWall

New member
Joined
Nov 25, 2008
Messages
247
MBTI Type
ENfP
Enneagram
4w5
I've found that whilst I'd say I have friends of most types - I primarily surround myself with extroverts.
I actually think that has less to do with my type though - and more to do with the fact that I'm heavily involved with the musical theatre scene, which tends to attract - you betcha - extroverts.

However, looking back on the kinds of people I've found myself to be attracted to romantically - they're almost all of the introverted persuasion, make of that as you will.
 

CzeCze

RETIRED
Joined
Sep 11, 2007
Messages
8,975
MBTI Type
GONE
Thanks for starting this thread, I was about to start one on I vs E as well. I think it has been touched upon in other threads but not sure if it was E vs I specific.

In theory, I like extraverts. I need more extraverts in my life. For whatever reason, most of my social circle from closest friends to acquaintances are introverts! It's maddening!

In reality, the people I befriend tend to be introverts and I like them all. :) I especally have a lot of INXP friends and tend to date introverts...I'm not really sure why. Availability? Oh wait, for dating the ladies, I like real old-school cool swagger, and that's usually a very calm, self-possessed person (introvert). I definitely bring the opposite quality, an upbeat engaging personality.

I think honestly the introverted friends I have feel more comfortable around me since I seem socially confident and relaxed and genuine. Sometimes introverts seek me out because they think I'm easy to talk to or entertaining and don't annoy them like other extraverts?

When I am drawn to my introverted friends, it's not so much a conscious awareness of their introversion that attracts me. It's that they are kooky or interesting or fun. My introverted friends are mostly very active and even very social and adventurous, so it's not like I'm attracted to more buttoned up or quieter people or home bodies, per sae. I also tend to like artists and they are usually introverted, I'm not kidding.

I honestly don't think I meeta lot of extraverts. I think I'm kinda in this IXXJ and IXXP bubble. Or perhaps the ones I meet are not trying to make friends or social or perhaps they are too serious...I dunno. I'm gonna think about that.

BTW, it's hard to accurately guage E vs I in MBT terms. There are lots of strong MBT introverts that have tons of friends and go out all the time and are very involved in community groups and clubs (probably an IXXJ). And there are extraverts who just aren't really that chatty or even socially engaging. I know a lot of bubbly, active introverts. I know they are introverted because they've taken the cognitive functions and/or MBT tests.
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
cze cze...i love reading your posts...because i feel like you're sitting right here talkin to me...i like that....stream of consciousness posts ftw...haha
 

AOA

♣️♦️♠️♥️
Joined
Jan 8, 2009
Messages
4,821
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8
Instinctual Variant
sx
As far as 'opposite attracts' goes, compatibility is to do with the first letter and the last (fourth) letter in the personality types - i.e. ESTP for ISTJ, or ENFP for INFJ. Like that.
 

redacted

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 28, 2007
Messages
4,223
As far as 'opposite attracts' goes, compatibility is to do with the first letter and the last (fourth) letter in the personality types - i.e. ESTP for ISTJ, or ENFP for INFJ. Like that.

Honestly most ENFPs are just way too much for me. I'd prefer an NTP or STP.

(What I'm trying to say is...that theory is pretty weak.)
 

sonata

New member
Joined
Dec 2, 2008
Messages
291
MBTI Type
iNtJ
As far as 'opposite attracts' goes, compatibility is to do with the first letter and the last (fourth) letter in the personality types - i.e. ESTP for ISTJ, or ENFP for INFJ. Like that.

To a degree --- ENTPs and I are usually attracted to each other, but get into this cycle of trying to flirt and verbally demolish the other person at the same time (to win the game, I suppose) and end up with some twisted love-hate relationship. Neither of us want to show weakness first. :steam:

There's just a bit too much NT there. I think I'd prefer an NFP.
 

AOA

♣️♦️♠️♥️
Joined
Jan 8, 2009
Messages
4,821
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8
Instinctual Variant
sx
(Evan) I believe, subconsciously that's the way it goes.

... sonata, yeah that's the INTJ/ENTP way, I'm aware. Personally, I've judged and liked INFPs more than INTPs, for the same reason. The compatibility with INTPs rests well, though.
 

Jack Flak

Permabanned
Joined
Jul 17, 2008
Messages
9,098
MBTI Type
type
As far as 'opposite attracts' goes, compatibility is to do with the first letter and the last (fourth) letter in the personality types - i.e. ESTP for ISTJ, or ENFP for INFJ. Like that.

(Evan) I believe, subconsciously that's the way it goes.

... sonata, yeah that's the INTJ/ENTP way, I'm aware. Personally, I've judged and liked INFPs more than INTPs, for the same reason. The compatibility with INTPs rests well, though.
That theory is quite silly, you know. Compatability for what purpose?
 

AOA

♣️♦️♠️♥️
Joined
Jan 8, 2009
Messages
4,821
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8
Instinctual Variant
sx
Compatibility between a pair, as in a good relation.

... yeah, Eck, that too!
 
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