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  1. #61
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spartacuss View Post
    This is one of those analogies that look pretty but don't really work as well in real life.
    ~ a definite introvert with a very strong preference for other introverts and a marked distaste for extroverts.
    As usual, I've allowed for exceptions with "This is how I see the most common dynamic."

    I do know introverts who don't want to engage extroverts, as these introverts highly prioritize their independence.

    It may or may not have a loose correlation with enneagram variants, such that a self-preservation variant values independence more than intimacy, and vice versa for the sexual variant.

  2. #62
    now! in shell form INA's Avatar
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    gross

  3. #63
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    lol 'k

  4. #64
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by InaF3157 View Post
    gross
    hey shut up chica i was kidding!!
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  5. #65
    now! in shell form INA's Avatar
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    don't come any closer. I'm not sexual like Flak.

  6. #66
    wholly charmed Spartacuss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Flak View Post
    As usual, I've allowed for exceptions with "This is how I see the most common dynamic."

    I do know introverts who don't want to engage extroverts, as these introverts highly prioritize their [I]independence.
    That's the thing though: I don't see that this is the most common dynamic in real life, actually. Certainly, one partner is often more intro/extroverted than the other, but not necessarily an intro/extrovert. Seems to me that introverts not uncommonly prefer the habits and pace of other introverts, while many extroverts thrive off the kind of stimulation other extroverts give. I have not, however, read any studies on the matter if pairing up by intro/extroversion, so who knows. I welcome anything you have on that score.
    Ti (43); Ne (41.8); Te (33.7); Fi (30.5); Ni (27.5); Se (24.7); Si (21.5); Fe (17.3)
    The More You Know the Less You Need. - Aboriginal Saying

  7. #67
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spartacuss View Post
    That's the thing though: I don't see that this is the most common dynamic in real life, actually. Certainly, one partner is often more intro/extroverted than the other, but not necessarily an intro/extrovert. Seems to me that introverts not uncommonly prefer the habits and pace of other introverts, while many extroverts thrive off the kind of stimulation other extroverts give. I have not, however, read any studies on the matter if pairing up by intro/extroversion, so who knows. I welcome anything you have on that score.
    I doubt there are any statistics available, and I don't think they would be relevant anyway.

    I even consider it likely that E-E and I-I relationships are more common. But it is the nature of the dynamics which I concern myself with.

  8. #68
    wholly charmed Spartacuss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Flak View Post
    I doubt there are any statistics available, and I don't think they would be relevant anyway.

    I even consider it likely that E-E and I-I relationships are more common. But it is the nature of the dynamics which I concern myself with.
    Oh, so it's not what the introverts and extroverts actually choose for relationships but rather how the relationships work.

    So by this:

    Introverts' psyches are are O shaped, and extroverts' are C shaped.
    OO results in, as you can see, two separate units which may exist comfortably together, but do not fully engage.
    CC (flip the second C around) results in each unit attempting to engage the other simultaneously, resulting in interference.
    CO results in a solid fit, with O being peacefully engaged by C.
    What do you mean by a solid fit? Do you mean that it is somehow a more optimal fit for both?
    How do you get to the most common dynamic being that the O is peacefully engaged by C (rather than being irritated)? Do you mean only theoretically (in your conception) with letter shape C and O or actually in the world with real people?
    Ti (43); Ne (41.8); Te (33.7); Fi (30.5); Ni (27.5); Se (24.7); Si (21.5); Fe (17.3)
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  9. #69
    Senior Member ptgatsby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spartacuss View Post
    That's the thing though: I don't see that this is the most common dynamic in real life, actually.
    I think the main reason for this is a flaw in how the coupling example works. Two Is are as likely to couple as an E-I, if not more so, due to the tendency of only sharing things with those close to them. Not all Is will be able to share everything, but the vast majority would consider their mates to be close enough.

    I don't see much evidence of opposites attracting, even on the I/E dimension. The most I can say is that, Es seem to just more 'attractive'. Positive energy normally is.

    (Personally, I hate it except in small doses, but I'm on the "socially anxious" side of the I/E divide.)

  10. #70
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spartacuss View Post
    What do you mean by a solid fit? Do you mean that it is somehow a more optimal fit for both?
    That's my position.

    How do you get to the most common dynamic being that the O is peacefully engaged by C (rather than being irritated)? Do you mean only theoretically (in your conception) with letter shape C and O or actually in the world with real people?
    It isn't so much a theory as an analogy, based on what I've noticed. I see E-E relationships in which there's just too much going on, in my opinion. Two talkers and no listeners.

    I see I-I relationships which are boring. Two listeners and no talkers.

    I see I-E relationships which seem just right, because one person talks and the other one listens.

    Again, there's more to people and relationships than introversion and extroversion, but with these traits isolated, these are my views.

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