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  1. #1
    Member littledarling's Avatar
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    Default INFJ, inner life a little too rich?

    I recently spoke with a fellow INFJ who could relate very well to my constant imagination. I know most INFJ's have an abundance of creative thought, but I wonder what this actually looks like. I find myself constantly "daydreaming", or creating wildly fictacious stories whenever my mind wanders. It's not something I consciously decide to do. Sometimes while in the company of others I will imagine the conversation going a completely different direction. I also tend to create conversations with people I know. I imagine exactly what would be said, felt, thought...and I play it over in my mind, adding and subtracting certain scenes. I have been known to confuse actual conversations with made-up ones, and have on occasion felt I had a much deeper relationship with someone than what actually was.
    I've noticed that some of the people I know in real life are actually much more fascinating in my imagination. I build people up in my mind, and am often disapointed when I spend real time with them. Mostly I enjoy my strong ideality and ability to fabricate fantasy so easily, but I can also see how easy it might be to get too wrapped up in my own world and shut others out. Is this something other INFJ's struggle with? Or any other type? Staying grounded. Sometimes I think that my make-believe life is much more appealing than real life, but I know that in order to make real life interesting I need to spend more time in it.
    Rain makes applesauce

  2. #2
    Habitual Fi LineStepper JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    I can actually relate to this. People often ask me why I spend so much time in my own little world, and I reply with "because my own little world is much more exciting than this one."

    I'm typically more concerned and more interested in what if than what is, and as such the worlds and realities I create are something I always get lost in.



  3. #3
    Senior Member StoryOfMyLife's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by littledarling View Post
    I recently spoke with a fellow INFJ who could relate very well to my constant imagination. I know most INFJ's have an abundance of creative thought, but I wonder what this actually looks like. I find myself constantly "daydreaming", or creating wildly fictacious stories whenever my mind wanders. It's not something I consciously decide to do. Sometimes while in the company of others I will imagine the conversation going a completely different direction. I also tend to create conversations with people I know. I imagine exactly what would be said, felt, thought...and I play it over in my mind, adding and subtracting certain scenes. I have been known to confuse actual conversations with made-up ones, and have on occasion felt I had a much deeper relationship with someone than what actually was.
    I've noticed that some of the people I know in real life are actually much more fascinating in my imagination. I build people up in my mind, and am often disapointed when I spend real time with them. Mostly I enjoy my strong ideality and ability to fabricate fantasy so easily, but I can also see how easy it might be to get too wrapped up in my own world and shut others out. Is this something other INFJ's struggle with? Or any other type? Staying grounded. Sometimes I think that my make-believe life is much more appealing than real life, but I know that in order to make real life interesting I need to spend more time in it.

    I tend to do this. My mind is constantly moving. If I appear to be 'zoning out', it's fairly safe to assume that I'm either thinking very heavily on something, or I am 'seeing' some kind of elaborate story unfold in my imagination.

    I don't do it purposely, either. It seems to be triggered whenever some interesting seed of thought or possibility is offered to me, or whenever I've suddenly become very entangled or enamored with something new. My latest obsessions will often times become the object of my day-dreams. It doesn't stop there, either. I dream about these fantasies while I sleep as well. Sadly, it seems to have put me off on settling for 'the norm' when it comes to reality. Some things just don't appeal to me as exciting enough and why bother when I can simply close my eyes or stare off into space and create an alternate 'reality' just by thinking about it? Nevertheless, sometimes this is so very frustrating...
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  4. #4
    Senior Member penelope's Avatar
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    Haha, it's very true for me. In fact, my friends have a name for that "look" on my face when I wander off... it's called "Kelly World."

    I often find myself laughing at the things I come up with in my head. Example... I'm walking on campus and see an open sewer top, and I imagine the TMNT jumping out and being like, "hey, got pizza?" and I'd be like, "no, but I could totally go for some" and they'd be like "radical" and I'd be like "tubular." And we'd go get pizza. Meanwhile, Shredder comes out another sewer hole and plots to destroy our pizza plan, but decides instead to torment me, so he follows me around campus and finds out where myc ar is, and then slices my tires.

    I mean, that's normal. And it happens within seconds. And if I'm not talking, my head is wandering into places like that. All the time.

    I quite like it, actually. I think it's what helps me being an introvert... I'm much happier in my own head than deal with the real stuff.

  5. #5
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by StoryOfMyLife View Post
    It seems to be triggered whenever some interesting seed of thought or possibility is offered to me, or whenever I've suddenly become very entangled or enamored with something new. My latest obsessions will often times become the object of my day-dreams. It doesn't stop there, either. I dream about these fantasies while I sleep as well. Sadly, it seems to have put me off on settling for 'the norm' when it comes to reality. Some things just don't appeal to me as exciting enough and why bother when I can simply close my eyes or stare off into space and create an alternate 'reality' just by thinking about it? Nevertheless, sometimes this is so very frustrating...
    Ditto.

    I'm always imagining something; I live in my head. Indeed, my fantasies are much better than reality. Unfortunately, when you're a J, duty calls...

  6. #6
    Senior Member penelope's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lauren Ashley View Post
    Unfortunately, when you're a J, duty calls...
    Yep. I can snap out of it as easily as I snap into it. I agree, though. NFs I'm sure are guilty of this, but the xNFJs are able to keep our feet on the ground while daydreaming, at least.

  7. #7
    Senior Member StoryOfMyLife's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by penelope View Post
    Yep. I can snap out of it as easily as I snap into it. I agree, though. NFs I'm sure are guilty of this, but the xNFJs are able to keep our feet on the ground while daydreaming, at least.

    Yep, feet firmly on the ground while my head is in the clouds. That seems pretty accurate. I've been accused several times of not 'listening' to somebody, while more often than not, I can very well repeat back everything they've just said to me. During my daydreams or fantasies, I can usually keep an ear open to what my friends are talking about. I just can't react to both simultaneously and so they think I'm not paying any attention at all.
    Don't hate me because you're beautiful.
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    http://www.mangabullet.com/visitme/ImaginAries.png

  8. #8
    Scream down the boulevard LadyJaye's Avatar
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    It must be an NF thing, because I'm almost constantly living in my head. I'm dialogging with myself, and with other people I know, but in my head. It's like I have to go there and hide for a little while, if my outer world is making heavy demands of me, so I can reboot.

    It concerns me how much more enchanting my inner world is than my outer world. I want to stay connected to my environment, but sometimes it's really difficult. Even worse when I'm thinking about spiritual connections with others - I could dwell on those all day.

  9. #9
    Senior Member SoAndSo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by littledarling View Post
    I recently spoke with a fellow INFJ who could relate very well to my constant imagination. I know most INFJ's have an abundance of creative thought, but I wonder what this actually looks like. I find myself constantly "daydreaming", or creating wildly fictacious stories whenever my mind wanders. It's not something I consciously decide to do. Sometimes while in the company of others I will imagine the conversation going a completely different direction. I also tend to create conversations with people I know. I imagine exactly what would be said, felt, thought...and I play it over in my mind, adding and subtracting certain scenes. I have been known to confuse actual conversations with made-up ones, and have on occasion felt I had a much deeper relationship with someone than what actually was.
    I've noticed that some of the people I know in real life are actually much more fascinating in my imagination. I build people up in my mind, and am often disapointed when I spend real time with them. Mostly I enjoy my strong ideality and ability to fabricate fantasy so easily, but I can also see how easy it might be to get too wrapped up in my own world and shut others out. Is this something other INFJ's struggle with? Or any other type? Staying grounded. Sometimes I think that my make-believe life is much more appealing than real life, but I know that in order to make real life interesting I need to spend more time in it.
    I had this exact conversation with an ENFJ the other day. I could have written this post word for word.
    "...Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand..." (the Skin Horse)

  10. #10
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    My inner world is actually kind of dead and repetitive a lot of the time. I WISH I had an imagination that went in enough directions for me to even come up with something interesting from the details I'm exposed to everyday.

    I'm still content in my inner world most of the time, but it can get so... stale sometimes, and especially when I contrast it with the worlds of people like you.

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