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  1. #91
    Senior Member Silent Stars's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ByMySword View Post
    I love how the one time you choose to lash back at someone, people automatically assume you do that all the time.
    I don't know about anyone else, but I certainly didn't.
    Quote Originally Posted by ByMySword View Post
    Right now, I'm in a very personal mood.

    Everything inherent in this conversation relates to the conflict earlier, so yeah, I'm taking this personal.
    Well, I'm sorry, but I didn't mean for it to be, ok?

  2. #92
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
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    Wow, I feel like I have some great power of manipulation that I haven't been using.

  3. #93
    Senior Member Rogue's Avatar
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    I'm sorry. Really and truely. please stop with the public humiliation. I posted that not to offend but I didnt think you were like that. I was just trying to be friends, I didn't know how bad I got on your nerves, now everyone does.

    I'm sorry. You have no idea how sorry.. yeah you hurt me, pretty damn bad, embarassed the hell out of me too..again...so sorry...

    back to your original topic...
    "bad things happen when people touch me!!"

  4. #94
    violaine
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    Quote Originally Posted by ByMySword View Post
    Now that I can finally reply to this:

    Yeah, I'll never date someone of my same type again. We're so alike, its awesome for awhile.

    The INFJ I was with I honestly loved. But she was a very unhealthy and unstable INFJ. She didn't know what she wanted. She was fine with the day in day out routine.

    To a point, I'm the same way. But I realized I wanted somone more adventurous I could get out and do things with. I'm restless, damnit.

    I had to end it. That was the hard part.
    What a shame....

    I always thought it would be totally awesome to date another INFJ. But maybe only within a certain 'bandwidth'. I am very restless too, that's why I thought it would be a good match. I need someone who can dream with me and then is happy to go out into the world and have adventures.

    Quote Originally Posted by ByMySword View Post
    But one of the main reasons is because she was very unstable and very needy. I need a partner, not an infant.

    Let me put it this way. Anyone seen Fatal Attraction?

    This chick was Glenn Close all over.
    Ewww, no!! I hate super-needy by nature in a partner (without good reason, I don't mean due to physical illness). It's just too hard for me to constantly factor that into everything.

    I will still hold out hope that certain INFJ can go together though.

  5. #95
    Senior Member Silent Stars's Avatar
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    I think it certainly could work, but that depends on the people involved, of course.

  6. #96
    `~~Philosoflying~~` SillySapienne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sanveane View Post
    What a shame....

    I always thought it would be totally awesome to date another INFJ.

    I will still hold out hope that certain INFJ can go together though.
    I think there are sooooooooooo many other variables aside from MBTI type that factor into making each person, well, unique.

    If I met a male ENFP who was uniquely awesome in his own way, I would so be open to developing a romantic relationship with him.

    For example, I think that Trent Reznor might be an ENFP, and I am borderline in love with him.

    Finding someone who shares your outlook on life and who really gets you would be sublime.
    `
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  7. #97
    violaine
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainChick View Post
    I think there are sooooooooooo many other variables aside from MBTI type that factor into making each person, well, unique.

    If I met a male ENFP who was uniquely awesome in his own way, I would so be open to developing a romantic relationship with him.

    For example, I think that Trent Reznor might be an ENFP, and I am borderline in love with him.

    Finding someone who shares your outlook on life and who really gets you would be sublime.
    This is true!

  8. #98
    Senior Member Kestrel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainChick View Post
    I think there are sooooooooooo many other variables aside from MBTI type that factor into making each person, well, unique.
    If anything, this board helps me understand how much variation there is within the types. I don't think I've met or seen another INFJ (male) that operates like I do. We have the same function preferences, sure, but we don't use them the same way. The type categories feel so restricting sometimes..
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  9. #99
    Seriously Delirious Udog's Avatar
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    It's a shame that threads where INFJs are honest about how they interact with people always turn out like this.

    I think there is ALOT that INFJs can teach us about human nature and personal interaction. Instead of judging, it would have been nice if we could have delved into the topic even deeper. For example, this stood out:

    Quote Originally Posted by sanveane View Post
    We automatically 'ping' others silently for signs and then match for meaning.
    What is the nature of these 'pings'? What is the meaning you search for? How do you feel and what do you do if you send a 'ping' out and get a completely unexpected response?

    Anyway, thanks INFJs for your honesty!

  10. #100
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    I honestly didn't expect so much crazy behavior on this thread. I particular observe the women reacting to this defensively and personally.

    Quote Originally Posted by pippi View Post
    Wow, the reactions to BMS's admission in this thread are fascinating to me. Did you all miss the part where he said he wouldn't hurt anyone intentionally? Do all of you really never do or say anything that will benefit you? Is this the 'Saints R Us' forum?
    I think I'll ask you to marry me for this statement here Lol.

    Quote Originally Posted by beyondaurora View Post

    Okay, here we go...

    No, I did not miss the part where he said he wouldn't hurt anyone intentionally. Nor did I miss the words "values" and "ethics" in his description.

    However, I also seemed to catch the phrases "but she wants it, so it's cool", "I have the person in the palm of my hands", "I would never advise someone I cared about to do the wrong thing", "the advice I give is never harmful", etc., etc.

    For one, by definition you cannot "manipulate" someone into doing something they want.

    Secondly, am I the only one concerned with someone who thinks that they know what is right for another person and manipulates that person to carry out related decisions?! Even if he does have the incredible gift of knowing what's right for others (an admission that I find both scary and narcissistic), where are the ethics in that?
    I didn't miss the part where you took something so vague to make a point on a thread so personal. And to be honest, I don't think you should be judging people on how they conduct their personal lives. There was nothing in his statement that could have been taken personal, and yet you got defensive about his choice of words.

    And yes, I believe you are the only one concerned with people trying to figure out what's best for those closest to them. I'd hate to see your friends.. I have asked his opinion on several situations, and had genuinely awesome and helpful advice each and every time. Showing people a different, and very obvious light when they're facing the wrong way is never a bad thing. I'm shocked you would even attempt to say otherwise to try and back up your defensive stance.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rogue View Post
    No one can fault you for being honest.
    I believe you did that the instant you made such a quick and judgmental post.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rogue View Post
    you can have the win.
    I'm saddened that you think anyone 'won' anything from that crazy situation.

    Quote Originally Posted by Silent Stars View Post
    So, would I be correct in thinking that you believe one wrong turn deserves another?
    I'm one to believe that usually human nature supercedes that logic. I'm also one to believe no one should be crucified for being natural and honest.

    Quote Originally Posted by Silent Stars View Post
    "Poetic justice" will never get you anywhere; I despise the idea, as it only ever seems like the correct solution in the heat of the moment when you are not thinking about the matter from an objective point of view. Blahblahblah.
    Quote Originally Posted by Silent Stars View Post
    You're taking what I said way too personally. I have nothing against you; after all, why would I? I don't even know you. The only part of what I said that was specifically directed at you was the last sentence of my first paragraph; the rest is really just a general statement.
    I also like this part here, where you proceed to read that he strongly values poetic justice, and you start to criticize it anyways. Then you expect him not to take things personally, after a very personal and heated debate. Instead of apologizing for your mayhap cross words, you simply justify them by sayign he's being personal. Blaming someone's sensitivity isn't the right way to go about things.

    Quote Originally Posted by Udog View Post
    It's a shame that threads where INFJs are honest about how they interact with people always turn out like this.

    I think there is ALOT that INFJs can teach us about human nature and personal interaction. Instead of judging, it would have been nice if we could have delved into the topic even deeper. For example, this stood out:

    What is the nature of these 'pings'? What is the meaning you search for? How do you feel and what do you do if you send a 'ping' out and get a completely unexpected response?

    Anyway, thanks INFJs for your honesty!
    Now we're actually getting somewhere. I think manipulation has a lot to do with observing human behavior and figuring out what people will respond to and what they will not. Sending out little tests to see how they're picked up is a big part of that, and I do find myself 'fishing' for what I should say and how to handle a situation when I'm level headed enough for it.

    I think INFJs have an awesome ability to not only care and empathize with people, but to take a detached perspective on things (unless it comes to themselves ) while balancing all of that on the quick-witted scale of experience. It makes for a very good manipulation set-up, though admittably I have never seen the INFJ I know to do anything even selfish in nature. If it benefits him, it does. If it does not though, he's still just as happy to be honest and open about what he evaluates. A pleasent surprise like a win-win isn't common, but when it occurs all the better is the attitude I've seen.
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