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  1. #11
    Senior Membrane spirilis's Avatar
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    hahaha, I can't hold a gaze at someone for more than a few seconds usually, ESPECIALLY if they're doing that to me... usually have to dart my eyes around the area or look just past them when talking to them.
    intp | type 9w1 sp/sx/so

  2. #12
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
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    Like was said previously, INxJs do this too and I think it has to do with Ni. I usually do this when I am imagining or analyzing something.

  3. #13

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lauren Ashley View Post
    Like was said previously, INxJs do this too and I think it has to do with Ni. I usually do this when I am imagining or analyzing something.
    /agree

    Although if I realize my Ni-lasersweep is making someone uncomfortable or it's at an inappropriate time, I try to check myself and ease off. I've made an ExFP boyfriend or two in my past quake in their boots when I was scanning for the fugitive lie. Ni, it's a visual MRI scan.

    I've also experienced that scan from a fellow Ni-dom and found it unnerving till I recognized it, which helped me react to it. My INFP boyfriend's father is INTJ (my speculation) and when I met him for the third time (he didn't speak to me the first two times because he FAILS at social etiquette) I noticed during our dinner conversation he was piercing me as I spoke. I felt the A-ha! moment. It was humorous for me to spot him and I don't know if he's familiar with MBTI, so I decided not to mention it.

    It seems that NiTe spots the emotions, but doesn't bother much with them. They pass over analyzing them up front and trace them like a line of keg powder to the source, which is how they churn out their analysis. Conversely, I speculate NiFe reads the emotions like an arterial roadmap to see the points of interest and make web-like connections. I think both however, are capable of employing the alternative method at times. But, it's merely abstract speculation...

    (On a personal note, I found the interaction between the three of us enlightening. I can't help but feel that I instinctively and naturally act as a psychological landbridge between the two. My boyfriend admits they interacted better with my casual facilitation, and I can easily see how they do not get along most of the time in my absence. INFP - INFJ - INTJ; interesting dinner conversation!)
    Last edited by iwakar; 12-07-2008 at 12:23 PM. Reason: parentheses
    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

  4. #14
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    /agree

    Although if I realize my Ni-lasersweep is making someone uncomfortable or it's at an inappropriate time, I try to check myself and ease off. I've made an ExFP boyfriend or two in my past quake in their boots when I was scanning for the fugitive lie. Ni, it's a visual MRI scan.

    I've also experienced that scan from a fellow Ni-dom and found it unnerving till I recognized it, which helped me react to it. My INFP boyfriend's father is INTJ (my speculation) and when I met him for the third time (he didn't speak to me the first two times because he FAILS at social etiquette) I noticed during our dinner conversation he was piercing me as I spoke. I felt the A-ha! moment. It was humorous for me to spot him and I don't know if he's familiar with MBTI, so I decided not to mention it.

    It seems that NiTe spots the emotions, but doesn't bother much with them. They pass over analyzing them up front and trace them like a line of keg powder to the source, which is how they churn out their analysis. Conversely, I speculate NiFe reads the emotions like an arterial roadmap to see the points of interest and make web-like connections. I think both however, are capable of employing the alternative method at times. But, it's merely abstract speculation...

    (On a personal note, I found the interaction between the three of us enlightening. I can't help but feel that I instinctively and naturally act as a psychological landbridge between the two. My boyfriend admits they interacted better with my casual facilitation, and I can easily see how they do not get along most of the time in my absence. INFP - INFJ - INTJ; interesting dinner conversation!)
    I have similar story that just happened this weekend with an ENTJ!

    Some of my coworkers and I went out for drinks after work and I've had a very strong feeling this woman was ENTJ (I'm totally in awe of her!) but it definitely confirmed on Friday. I get really excited when I meet other ENJs because the only EN types I run across are ENPs and with that.

    But what's been interesting about her is that even though I feel oddly comfortable around her, I still (or until the end of Friday night) felt that I was constantly given the once over for sizing up but since I wasn't outright dismissed I must have been exuding some saving grace. Maybe that's the Ni-Te/Te-Ni thing you're talking about? I don't think I would've gone about it in the same way.

    If I'm giving anyone a piercing stare I'm not aware of it and if I am it's not something I'd want to continue. I've gotten those before and I feel like it puts me in a pissing contest that I don't want to lose. I wouldn't want anyone to feel as uncomfortable as I feel when I get those looks.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
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  5. #15
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    Shouldn't the quality of the stare taken in count?
    I find the INTJ stare way different from the ENFJ stare even if they are both soul piercing. And I usually get the urge to stare right back, or size the other person up also. :rolli:
    Oh, sorry. iwakar had already posted about that.

  6. #16
    Senior Member Sunshine's Avatar
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    It's not just an NFJ thing.

  7. #17
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sunshine View Post
    It's not just an NFJ thing.
    Johnny Rotten stared at people like a crazed fiend because of the mysterious piercing quality called "meningitis-ruined eye sight".

    I've never felt intimidated or put-off by NFJs of any kind, nor NTJs. Crossing up an ISTJ/ISTP might lead to a hard stare, however.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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  8. #18
    Glycerine
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    I've even done this with teachers on accident. They are like "hi, IDK...???" and then I get startled because I didn't realize I was staring at them and respond with a "uhhh.. hi???...haha. It's like I completely zone out without being aware of my surroundings. Oh crud, that was not relevant to this thread but I also tend to do the soul-piercing stare and it really tends to freak people out.

  9. #19
    Dhampyr Economica's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    It seems that NiTe spots the emotions, but doesn't bother much with them. They pass over analyzing them up front and trace them like a line of keg powder to the source, which is how they churn out their analysis. Conversely, I speculate NiFe reads the emotions like an arterial roadmap to see the points of interest and make web-like connections. I think both however, are capable of employing the alternative method at times. But, it's merely abstract speculation...
    As an INTJ who has recently become aware of just how good NFJs are at reading others I have to disagree with the bolded part. Next to you guys (and several other types, e.g. ENTP) we're all but oblivious to body language. Our analyses of others are primarily based on their statements and actions, not:

    Quote Originally Posted by LindseyLadybug View Post
    every detail in their expressions, mannerisms, clothing, word choice, reactions, etc

  10. #20
    Senior Member LunaIndigo's Avatar
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    My mother is an ENFJ and sometimes at home I'll look up and she's totally staring at me from across the living room. It's very unnerving. I'm like, "Wha...?" she's like, "Just lookin' atcha." She doesn't understand how creepy it is.

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