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Thread: Teach me how to be a feeler.

  1. #71
    Senior Member Array alcea rosea's Avatar
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    Nov 2007


    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    This is not a sarcastic thread. Today I tried. I told my friend that I was going to turn over a new leaf. She told me a little later that "its ok these things dont just happen over night." So I am asking, i know I cant change my type, but how do I soften the T?
    First learn to accept yourself as you are, then develop your inferior functions.

  2. #72
    Senior Member Array Tiltyred's Avatar
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    Dec 2008
    468 sx/sp


    I go with the diplomacy suggestion. But I feel pretty strongly that you should not say things just to please her unless you fully intend to back it up. Don't say, especially after she's said it means so much to her, that you are going to her party unless you are going. IMO, considering the hassle it's going to be to go to her party, you might have offered to spend time with her another way, i.e., "I'm so sorry I can't make it -- I know it means a lot to you and I'm so touched that you want me there. Can we go out to dinner (or whatever) next week, when my schedule will be more flexible, and you can tell me all about it then." And then maybe call her on party day to say you're thinking of her and you know the party will go well and you look forward to your time with her next week.

  3. #73
    Senior Member Array mlittrell's Avatar
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    Sep 2008


    Quote Originally Posted by ajblaise View Post
    I always viewed it like this:

    T's: Go about decisions in a more detached way.
    F's: Go about decisions in a less detached way, and are more likely to empathize with the situation and the people involved. More likely to be influenced by feelings and values in the decision making process.
    i say it very similarly

    T's: Take a step back from the decision, look at it from a distance, and decide by deductively/inductively choosing the most logical answer

    F's: Place themselves into the decision and make a decision based on personal values and you can fill in the rest.
    "Honest differences are often a healthy sign of progress. "

    "You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty."

    "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."

    Mahatma Gandhi

    Enneagram: 9w1

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