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  1. #1
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    Default The ENFJ Facade/Fakeness

    hi i'm new,

    a lurker, but now a member!

    At work today, a colleague said to me 'I feel like you're hiding who you really are from me'

    Do enfjs get this a lot, and why?

  2. #2
    Wild Card Atomic Fiend's Avatar
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    Welcome.

    Yes they do, don't know why, I don't think it's intentional though.

  3. #3
    now! in shell form INA's Avatar
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    They can seem inscrutable, like they're holding something back behind that charm and good nature, and that's because they often are. If you're smart and press the right pressure points, you may just get it, too.
    hoarding time and space
    A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.
    — Antoine de Saint-Exupery

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by IF3157 View Post
    They can seem inscrutable, like they're holding something back behind that charm and good nature, and that's because they often are. If you're smart and press the right pressure points, you may just get it, too.
    like what?

    i don't feel like i'm hiding anything? :confused:

  5. #5
    Guerilla Urbanist Brendan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jim View Post
    Do enfjs get this a lot, and why?
    Yes, because most people can't handle what lies behind the mask, and I at least would rather not drive most people away.
    There is no such thing as separation from God.

  6. #6
    now! in shell form INA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jim View Post
    like what?

    i don't feel like i'm hiding anything? :confused:
    I wonder if they even see it that way. I noticed a tendency sometimes to hold back their negative personal opinion of something if expressing judgment is disruptive and goes against getting people to cooperate the way they want. They pace themselves. Unless I'm just lucky so far.
    hoarding time and space
    A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.
    — Antoine de Saint-Exupery

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by IF3157 View Post
    I wonder if they even see it that way. I noticed a tendency sometimes to hold back their negative personal opinion of something if expressing judgment is disruptive and goes against getting people to cooperate the way they want. They pace themselves. Unless I'm just lucky so far.
    Perhaps

    This is the same person that called me the most truthful person they've ever known. I've known them for a long time, so I can't understand why they would say this now...are enfjs renowned for being a more 'reserved' type of extrovert?

  8. #8
    Sniffles
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    Perhaps it's an NFJ thing? Since I commonly hear similar remarks made about INFJs - but then again we're introverts so we have that excuse.

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    Wild Card Atomic Fiend's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jim View Post
    ...are enfjs renowned for being a more 'reserved' type of extrovert?
    No.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peguy View Post
    Perhaps it's an NFJ thing? Since I commonly hear similar remarks made about INFJs - but then again we're introverts so we have that excuse.


    Well, I think I'm more introverted, but I've been told numerous times that I'm an extrovert?

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