[ENFJ] ENFJs ?

[INTJMom]

I'm curious...
My 14 year old son is an ENFJ.
His best subjects in school are math and science,
yet he's an avid reader and very verbal.
I'm puzzled because he's not doing well in his (English) Language Arts class.

Have any of you had that experience?

And also, what careers have worked out well for such an ENFJ?

 

[Nonsensical]

all the ENFJs share that, relatively, in common with your son..and I really find that ENFJs make very very great, caring, teachers, and as a matter of fact, two of my favorite teachers at school are ENFJs.

 

[INTJMom]

Thank you.

 

[A Schnitzel]

I have some ENFJ friends in University and they are quite versatile. One started in Genetics, but she didn't care for the genetics labs so switched to biomedical engineering. Another started out in crop science, but decided to switch to nutrition. I haven't talke to her since if she liked the program or not. I met one in a human ecology/textiles course. She was in the elementary education human ecology combined program. My male ENFJ best friend is in the trades, I think he's doing carpentry. My ENFJ aunt is a higher ranked Nurse who plans to pursue teaching Nursing in the future.

Because they're hard workers, they can do pretty much anything they set their minds too. A common trend seemed to be enjoyment of the softer sciences and a need to interact with people.

 

[wedekit]

My really close ENFJ friend is an accounting major. I think this was simply because her dad has a high position in Exxon and she wishes to follow in his footsteps. What is notable is that she is the president of SAB (Student Activities Board) at my University, and she is amazing at the job. It comes so naturally to her. She basically plans all the major events on campus. Everyone says she is the best SAB president we have ever had (especially when comparing her to the INTJ one we had last year).

We had our Halloween dance last week and she just stood in the very back by the food instead of dancing and having fun (like she normally does). I asked her if everything was ok, and she looked at me, smiled, and said: "Yeah. Everything is perfect. For some reason I'm having just as much fun watching everyone enjoy themselves at what I put together for them..." It was very heartwarming; and she did put an insane amount of time (two months) into every aspect of the dance.

What I'm getting at is that I think what ultimately makes her happy is leading and providing for large groups of people. She is naturally able to lead people in meetings and keep them engaged. Her dominant Fe shines brightly. I thought I would mention all of this in case you see these kind of abilities in you son.

And about not doing so well in English: It is possible that his class could be very boring to him. English is my favorite subject, but I often don't do as well in my English classes because the teacher picks a dull book to "explore" (e.g. Heart of Darkness), or something like that. It's insanely hard for me to put a lot of effort into something I don't find important or something I find boring. You should discuss this possibility with him.

 

[Usehername]

I'm puzzled because he's not doing well in his (English) Language Arts class.

Betchya his teacher is a traditionalist "good writing means less errors" kinda person without much ability to read subtext and symbols.

 

[Brendan]

I'm curious...
My 14 year old son is an ENFJ.
His best subjects in school are math and science,
yet he's an avid reader and very verbal.
I'm puzzled because he's not doing well in his (English) Language Arts class.

Have any of you had that experience?

Yes. I hated school from grades 5 on. I repeated 10th grade. I still graduated with the class I started with, but only barely, and only because people who had sway over such things cared enough to put me in classes they knew I would have to try to fail at. Meaning they cared more than I did.

I'm an honors student at college.

And yes, the maths and sciences are my forte and I'm also an avid reader and very verbal.

I simply do not like being told what to do and when to do it.

 

[INTJMom]

Yes. I hated school from grades 5 on. I repeated 10th grade. I still graduated with the class I started with, but only barely, and only because people who had sway over such things cared enough to put me in classes they knew I would have to try to fail at. Meaning they cared more than I did.

I'm an honors student at college.

And yes, the maths and sciences are my forte and I'm also an avid reader and very verbal.

I simply do not like being told what to do and when to do it.

LOL Brendan, thanks for your input. I appreciate it.

 

[Brendan]

LOL Brendan, thanks for your input. I appreciate it.

Lol. Anytime. ENFJ kids, if I'm typical of them, are very giving and flexible, but sometimes we just come to something we simply refuse to budge on. We have fiery personalities and are very, very stubborn. Though I'm sure he got part of that from you, being an INTJ and all, lol.

 

[INTJMom]

Betchya his teacher is a traditionalist "good writing means less errors" kinda person without much ability to read subtext and symbols.

You could be right. I don't know. I haven't met her yet.
One of the notes on his paper was "I don't like your style."
Not sure what grade he got on that paper.
She doesn't let the kids keep their papers.
Hopefully, I'll see them tomorrow.
She came across very TJ in her emails to me.
I'm not surprised my son is having a hard time with her.

After addressing her as Dear Mrs. so-and-so, asking her for a meeting, letting her know my son couldn't come because of a previous commitment with a different teacher, and signing it Sincerely, my name, the first thing I received from her was this:
"Any meeting would be unproductive without [your son's] presence. I shall speak to Mrs. so-and-so about excusing him for a brief period." And then she suggested a couple of time slots to choose from.

So yeah. Not surprised my son is having a hard time with a woman like that.

 

[Brendan]

You could be right. I don't know. I haven't met her yet.
One of the notes on his paper was "I don't like your style."
Not sure what grade he got on that paper.
She doesn't let the kids keep their papers.
Hopefully, I'll see them tomorrow.
She came across very TJ in her emails to me.
I'm not surprised my son is having a hard time with her.

After addressing her as Dear Mrs. so-and-so, asking her for a meeting, letting her know my son couldn't come because of a previous commitment with a different teacher, and signing it Sincerely, my name, the first thing I received from her was this:
"Any meeting would be unproductive without [your son's] presence. I shall speak to Mrs. so-and-so about excusing him for a brief period." And then she suggested a couple of time slots to choose from.

So yeah. Not surprised my son is having a hard time with a woman like that.

Well, just to caution you, if she turns out to be an ESTJ, all bets are off. In my first-hand experience, ESTJ and ENFJ are an explosive combination.

 

[INTJMom]

Well, just to caution you, if she turns out to be an ESTJ, all bets are off. In my first-hand experience, ESTJ and ENFJ are an explosive combination.

I've witnessed that.
It wasn't pretty.



BTW: He's insisting that he has ADD because his thoughts keep side-tracking and it takes him too long to do his homework.
Any comments?

 

[Brendan]

BTW: He's insisting that he has ADD because his thoughts keep side-tracking and it takes him too long to do his homework.
Any comments?

LOL. My comment on the matter is: word, homey.

 

[Domino]

I'm curious...
My 14 year old son is an ENFJ.
His best subjects in school are math and science,
yet he's an avid reader and very verbal.
I'm puzzled because he's not doing well in his (English) Language Arts class.

Have any of you had that experience?

And also, what careers have worked out well for such an ENFJ?

I did very well in English and just about anything that didn't involve numbers (in which case I really had to grind it out). I was a mechanic (which I don't recommend) and had been in robotics/automation (until the numbers threatened to take me hostage).

Anything that can make him feel thoroughly engaged with potential to socialize and evolve.

 

[INTJMom]

I did very well in English and just about anything that didn't involve numbers (in which case I really had to grind it out). I was a mechanic (which I don't recommend) and had been in robotics/automation (until the numbers threatened to take me hostage).

Anything that can make him feel thoroughly engaged with potential to socialize and evolve.

Thank you.

 

[booya moon]

My husband is an ENFJ and he is very good at maths and computer science. Eventualy that led him to PhD in robotics (and he really enjoys his work). He is also a great teacher (he teaches part-time at the Uni).
And yes, he likes to read: usually science books that are not from his field (recently he is into genetics - my field), he also likes science-fiction novels.

 

[King sns]

physical therapist!

 

[The Third Rider]

I've witnessed that.
It wasn't pretty.



BTW: He's insisting that he has ADD because his thoughts keep side-tracking and it takes him too long to do his homework.
Any comments?

That happens to me as well, whenever I find a subject that is dull or borring my mind starts wondering off 2 seconds into writing/reading the first line on the page. I too have wondered if I have ADD. lol I guess it's normal, i was a very good student back in middle school and I was always very good at math as well and I too enjoy reading a lot. But when I went to high school it all went down hill from there. lol My peers were just a bunch of clowns and I had real hard time focusing.

 

[INTJMom]

That happens to me as well, whenever I find a subject that is dull or borring my mind starts wondering off 2 seconds into writing/reading the first line on the page. I too have wondered if I have ADD. lol I guess it's normal, i was a very good student back in middle school and I was always very good at math as well and I too enjoy reading a lot. But when I went to high school it all went down hill from there. lol My peers were just a bunch of clowns and I have real hard time focusing.

Thank you for sharing that. I'll have my son read it. I'm sure he'll appreciate it.

 

[Valiant]

One I know in Norway is a makeup-artist.
The other two I know are hopeless people who never seem to be able to move from their parents houses and get real jobs