Blech. If you don't think compatibility and type are related then choose another topic.
I'm very nearly an INFP and I've been dating an INFJ for over a year. It works out pretty well for us. In our relationship I'm the moody one, however, which seems to be different from some of you. Getting my INFJ to emotionally communicate openly has been the biggest trial, and keeping my mood stable has been a big one as well.
I have an INFP roommate and we get along wonderfully. The lack of structure is frustrating at times, but really only when it interferes with my own structure. She the more outgoing of the two of us and likes to challenge people's comfort zones, which for some reason I really like about her. She isn't fake, a quality I value highly.
I've always been drawn to INFJs, but I've never been quite able to make it click. There is connection, and attraction, but as Eileen said, never any real fire. If it ever does click, it will be incredible... but I won't hold my breath.
The pattern in my life that I noticed (as a male with female INFJs) is that to make an INFJ helplessly attracted to you, you have to really stimulate their Se.
Positive: Never been better (NOT perfectly of course) understood with so much patience and appreciation.
Negative: As the lone J, definitely feel put upon "to make the call" on life's decisions.
This doesn't bear true in my relationship. He takes a lot longer to come a to decision than I do (procrastinates like crazy), it is just that once he's made a decision he wants it set in stone and I'll allow more flexing after coming to a decision. He also needs external motivation to do chores and such, he relies on me a lot of the time to provide it. That can be a little draining. I'm the one who ends up filing taxes and paying bills and things like that.
^ was edited to better explain. (lol, nothing's ever totally finished!)
I dated an INFJ years ago - the only guy I've ever been in love with. I loved that we didn't have to talk in order to be on the same page, like scary telepathy. But, he was moody - actually, every NFJ I know is moody - and his feelings, though internalized, really seemed to take him over, like he just couldn't handle them sometimes. It was driving my Fi up the wall. I have to say though, the chemistry was insane.
I wonder if INFP's have the advantage over us ENFP's in the sense that they are more their own island, and can retreat within themselves when someone is moody or difficult. ?