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  1. #41
    desert pelican Owl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Flak View Post
    I want to be happy forever.
    Granted. You are transformed into undying, slightly drunk clam that will forever soak in a hot tub.

    I wish all the ladies found me utterly irresistable.

  2. #42
    desert pelican Owl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uberfuhrer View Post
    Granted, it is now completely empty.

    I want a Bloody Mary.
    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    done, but I misunderstood I found some one named Mary and slashed her and gave her to you.
    No, no, no. That's not how it goes.

    You were suppose to say:

    Granted, but there's a string in it.

  3. #43
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Owl View Post
    No, no, no. That's not how it goes.

    You were suppose to say:

    Granted, but there's a string in it.
    pfffff if everyone followed the rules all the time things would be boring....

  4. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by Owl View Post
    I wish all the ladies found me utterly irresistable.
    Granted. They can't resist you because you have them tied down in your basement.

    I want my computer hardware to get here faster.

  5. #45
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uberfuhrer View Post
    Granted. They can't resist you because you have them tied down in your basement.

    I want my computer hardware to get here faster.
    granted but it doesn't work

    I want someone to go to Jimmy Johns and get me a beach club.

  6. #46
    Just a statistic rhinosaur's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    I want someone to go to Jimmy Johns and get me a beach club.
    Granted, but they accidentally spill diet coke on it, making the bread soggy.

    I wish for two IMAX tickets to see The Dark Knight.

  7. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by rhinosaur View Post
    I wish for two IMAX tickets to see The Dark Knight.
    Granted. The tickets were for a showing that happened a week ago.

    I wish for new shoelaces.

  8. #48
    Just a statistic rhinosaur's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uberfuhrer View Post
    Granted. The tickets were for a showing that happened a week ago.

    I wish for new shoelaces.
    Wish granted. *Gives Uberfuhrer a roll of cotton thread, and two of those plastic things that go on the ends of shoelaces*
    Some assembly required.

    I would like a new car.

  9. #49
    Free-Rangin' Librarian Jae Rae's Avatar
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    OK, you got a gas-guzzling SUV. Gas is $.50 a gallon and climbing.

    I would like a long nap this afternoon.
    Proud Female Rider in Maverick's Bike Club.

  10. #50
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
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    (In before Uber's death joke!)

    You've got it. You have an erotic dream about Dom Delouise.

    I want cake.
    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -anonymous graffiti in the basilica at Pompeii

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