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Thread: War Stories

  1. #1
    Wonderer Samuel De Mazarin's Avatar
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    Default War Stories

    Based on some stuff I read in the liquor thread, since it's fun to share, and it's fun to read what people share, I've created the unofficial MBTIc WAR STORIES THREAD. I say war stories in the context of DRUG USE. And yes, my use of the word 'drug' includes alcohol. So here are Beat and Oberon to start us off. I'll post one of my own as well.

    Quote Originally Posted by Beat View Post
    How about Brandy?

    First (and only) time I ever got completely blackout, wake-up-puking TRASHED was off of severely cheap Brandy. Never again. Never a god damn gain.
    Quote Originally Posted by oberon View Post
    My first time was with an unholy bourbon-like evil spirit called "Fighting Cock."

    They don't call it the kickin' chicken for nothing.
    Madman's azure lie: a zen miasma ruled.

    Realize us, Madman!

    I razed a slum, Amen.

    ...............................................

  2. #2
    lurking.... Wyst's Avatar
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    First time I was truly wasted was totally not my fault. Haha, no really! I was sick the night before and took some cough medicine when I woke up around 7am. Then around 6pm went to a welcome party where the staff were serving wine.

    Well, I don't know how I made it home that night but I seem to remember images of me running/skipping down the hill to my apartment a mile away.

    The headache the next day was awful. Never consuming alcohol again within 36 hours of taking medicine

  3. #3
    Order Now! pure_mercury's Avatar
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    I was once on 10 different drugs at one time, 7 of them illegal.
    Who wants to try a bottle of merc's "Extroversion Olive Oil?"

  4. #4
    Senior Member substitute's Avatar
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    The only time I ever woke up with ZERO recollection of the night before was when I'd been drinking vodka. So considering the things I've drunk/consumed and STILL had near total recall, I reckon that means I must have some kind of special vulnerability particularly to vodka.

    I remember being on acid once and thinking I was being chased down the street by this Mars wrapper. I was walking along and I heard the rustling behind me, I turned round and there it was. Nah, just a wrapper, I thought to myself, and carried on. I turned a corner. I heard a rustle again - the bastard had followed me round the corner. I tried to shake off the crazy feeling and quickened my pace. I couldn't hear any rustling any more so I sat down on a wall to light a cigarette, feeling pretty smug.

    There I sat, seeing the most amazing fractal patterns in the smoke, when suddenly I heard that sound again, and the fucking Mars wrapper rolled up to my foot and just STOPPED. I stood up and stamped and stomped on it, cursing blue murder - God knows what the people whose houses I was standing outside must've thought, if they thought anything, since it was about 4.30am.

    Then I ran like the wind. And whenever I turned round to look over my shoulder, it was there again. And it seemed to be getting bigger and bigger. When I finally got home it was like I was being chased by Godzilla - I pushed the key in the door and slid through a small gap, slamming it behind me and doing the classic leaning on the door and panting thing. I even put the chain and deadlock on the door.

    It seemed so fucking real, man. It was my first acid experience, and it was so fucking awesome I did it on a regular basis thereafter.
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

    "When it all comes down to dust
    I will kill you if I must
    I will help you if I can" - Leonard Cohen

  5. #5
    Wonderer Samuel De Mazarin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pure_mercury View Post
    I was once on 10 different drugs at one time, 7 of them illegal.
    Wow.... that's outright prodigious, papi. I hope you divulge the list, at least on PM... the most I've done at a time is (wrinkling brow):

    five

    weed, alcohol, coke, dextromethorphan, perkasetz...

    though one could push it to six with the whippets I was hitting before I completely lost all sense of my being.
    Madman's azure lie: a zen miasma ruled.

    Realize us, Madman!

    I razed a slum, Amen.

    ...............................................

  6. #6
    Wonderer Samuel De Mazarin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by substitute View Post
    The only time I ever woke up with ZERO recollection of the night before was when I'd been drinking vodka. So considering the things I've drunk/consumed and STILL had near total recall, I reckon that means I must have some kind of special vulnerability particularly to vodka.

    I remember being on acid once and thinking I was being chased down the street by this Mars wrapper. I was walking along and I heard the rustling behind me, I turned round and there it was. Nah, just a wrapper, I thought to myself, and carried on. I turned a corner. I heard a rustle again - the bastard had followed me round the corner. I tried to shake off the crazy feeling and quickened my pace. I couldn't hear any rustling any more so I sat down on a wall to light a cigarette, feeling pretty smug.

    There I sat, seeing the most amazing fractal patterns in the smoke, when suddenly I heard that sound again, and the fucking Mars wrapper rolled up to my foot and just STOPPED. I stood up and stamped and stomped on it, cursing blue murder - God knows what the people whose houses I was standing outside must've thought, if they thought anything, since it was about 4.30am.

    Then I ran like the wind. And whenever I turned round to look over my shoulder, it was there again. And it seemed to be getting bigger and bigger. When I finally got home it was like I was being chased by Godzilla - I pushed the key in the door and slid through a small gap, slamming it behind me and doing the classic leaning on the door and panting thing. I even put the chain and deadlock on the door.

    It seemed so fucking real, man. It was my first acid experience, and it was so fucking awesome I did it on a regular basis thereafter.
    Now... THAT... was a beautiful little 'war' story. I hope you PM me before you drop by New York City. I'm most inspired by the fact that, unlike 'regular' folk, you thought the experience (at least in retrospect) was kind of awesome... as opposed to "oooh.... it was terrible... I'm going to go become a perennially self-fondling teetotaler."
    Madman's azure lie: a zen miasma ruled.

    Realize us, Madman!

    I razed a slum, Amen.

    ...............................................

  7. #7
    Wonderer Samuel De Mazarin's Avatar
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    Okay... I'll give three different sitchies:

    1) 17 and have finished consuming about 3/5ths of a massive bottle of Drambui.... in school... taking swigs between and even during classes (physics class in particular)... by the time it was three o' clock, I was a walking, talking sickness. When the school nurse, alerted to my krazzy behavior, came to my French class to extract and deal with me, I got up with with a lolling gait and, looking at my very rotund and friendly French teacher, slapped his belly in jocund spirits and told everyone to wait for me, I'd just be back in a jiffy. There were perhaps five lockers which were spared my shoulder as I tottered sideways, diagonally and, with the help of the struggling, 70-year-old nurse, actually forward somehow. oh god... drunk in school. Yes, I got suspended.

    2) I was 19... naturally, blitzed... policeman were holding me while an ambulance made its way to the scene of my inebriation, but I was getting impatient and belligerent and, upon being asked by an officer why I wasn't cooperating, responded "Hey man, you guys ain't dancing to my tune!" That was on the police report. So, I suddenly got it into my fool head to make a run for it, a romantic vision of disappearing into the New England hills and away from the Man. So I bolted, but instead of taking the high road, like an idiot (who's drunk), I ran down a fucking highway, where a policeman cut me off at the pass... in a fucking cop car. So I was hauled down to a drunk tank where I proceeded to bang on the doors and shout at people until I sobered up, by which time I was so damned tired I couldn't understand mentalese any more.

    3) I was 19 and so high on acid that, on the spur of the moment, with true love and reverence, absolutely spontaneously, without ever having thought of actually doing it before, I hugged a tree. Yes, I hugged a tree, felt her rough and inviting bark upon my tingling face, looked up at her benedictive branches, fluttering leaves shadowed and shining in the sunlight, and realized only later that I was a fucking tree-hugger.

    I guess the third one's the opposite of a war story. But we all need some peace now and again. Drugs haven't been all bad.
    Madman's azure lie: a zen miasma ruled.

    Realize us, Madman!

    I razed a slum, Amen.

    ...............................................

  8. #8
    Senior Member substitute's Avatar
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    And then there was this other time I was on acid, and we went to see a movie. The movie was Seven. At the time, nothing occurred to us as to why this particular movie was a bad thing to see on acid. But actually it was awesome. With hindsight. At the time, it was the scariest thing I have ever, ever experienced. 100% TOTAL involvement. It was like I was actually THERE in the movie. And when I came out the cinema, I was petrified that someone would try and murder me before I got to the car.

    I got in the car with my friend Geoff, while Steve, Simon and Maia got in Steve's car. We agreed to drive to the woods and meet there, for a mad ramble through the night. We stocked up on weed, cos you need that shit to stop yourself hitting the ceiling sometimes on acid.

    As me and Geoff drove along, the journey seemed to be taking absurdly long. To my knowledge, the woods shouldn't have been any longer than like, 10 minutes away, and yet it seemed like hours had passed and we still weren't there. It wasn't until someone in a car behind sounded their horn and raced off, with us sticking our fingers up through the windows and yelling WANKER at him, that we looked at the speedo and saw we were going along at 15mph. Oh how we laughed.

    But I was still really scared from the movie. Geoff asked what was wrong - actually I forgot to mention he hadn't come into the movie with us, he'd gone to the bowling alley next door with Simon while me, Steve and Maia went to the movie. I told him all about it, as though I'd been literally there and all the events were real. And somehow, in the retelling, I transferred all my fear and terror onto Geoff.

    He started babbling about whether it was a good idea or not to meet up with the others at the woods. I asked whyever not, and he said he didn't trust Steve, he'd been acting funny lately. We theorized as to whether Steve was in fact luring us to the woods to murder us. But by and by, we arrived at the woods.

    We saw Steve's car, but there were no lights on inside and it seemed deserted. I just got out the car and said "C'mon, let's nick his weed!" but Geoff didn't wanna get out the car. I started having second thoughts. We discussed the possibility of looking into Steve's car windows to see Simon and Maia all slashed up and mutilated and Steve jumping out from behind us and doing us over too.

    Then a light went on in Steve's car and a door opened, and the most enormous cloud of smoke billowed out into the moonlight. Simon stuck his head out the door and called to us, "Come on, you coming or not?" and with that, the spell was broken. We sat in Steve's car (being a 7 seater) and hotboxed it. Then we went for a walk in the woods. We burried Maia alive, then dug her up again 10 minutes later. Investigations a couple of days later revealed that the 'grave' had only been about 2" deep, but at the time we thought it was like, a pit. It explained at least, why she'd been pissing herself with laughter the whole time.

    Then we went looking for a secluded spot (oblivious to the fact we were already in one), and ended up parking in the swimming pool car park at St Albans, near London. This car park is in the centre of the town, on top of a high hill. We got out the cars and set all the blinkers flashing and turned the music up and danced like loons to Primus' (then) new album, Tales From the Punchbowl. At one point, someone said "Do you think we're a bit conspicuous?" to which the reply was "Yeah you're right, better turn the music down a bit." And we carried on.

    I think I slept for 48 hours straight after that, when we finally got home.
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

    "When it all comes down to dust
    I will kill you if I must
    I will help you if I can" - Leonard Cohen

  9. #9
    Senior Member substitute's Avatar
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    Why thank you sir, I retold it with utmost reverence.

    And I'm now pissing myself laughing at your stories... particularly the phrase "to extract and deal with me"
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

    "When it all comes down to dust
    I will kill you if I must
    I will help you if I can" - Leonard Cohen

  10. #10
    Wonderer Samuel De Mazarin's Avatar
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    ^^ oh god... murdering folks on acid... all in a day for you Brits?
    Madman's azure lie: a zen miasma ruled.

    Realize us, Madman!

    I razed a slum, Amen.

    ...............................................

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