User Tag List

First 23456 Last

Results 31 to 40 of 58

  1. #31
    your resident asshole
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    4,407

    Default

    Why hello there! I should've seen this thread sooner!

    I am definitely asocial, but probably not really antisocial (everyone treats them as synonyms though).

    Quote Originally Posted by Pseudo View Post
    I get really anxious in social situations and I don have great social skills. I very rarely look people in the eyes and Ive been told I generally mumble or don't speak clearly. I find I even get worried before things like calling people on the phone or having to talk to a teacher or a sales person. I'm pretty bad about dropping casual conversation conversations though I've very talkative with friends. I have very few people I would consider friends. I have a lot of people I see a lot who I still consider acquaintances because I don't feel comfortable just calling them to hang out. Generally It takes a few weeks for me to open up so most relationships start at school or work where there has been prolonged contact, and even then it's always the other person who has to take it out of that area to a real friendship. I'm really horrible with keeping up with people, calling on the phone and what not. It either seems too draining or I get worried they'll be annoyed. I've never been in clubs or organizations.
    Are we the same person? O.o The only difference seems to be that I joined a club this year, so I'm continually improving my social skills. Yay me!

    A question...do you also tend to avoid people you know if they see you or if they want to hang out? I used to always do this, but I seem to have gotten much better over the years. I've still never asked anyone if they wanted to hang out, though.

  2. #32
    Senior Member Pseudo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 so/sx
    Posts
    2,051

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DisneyGeek View Post
    Why hello there! I should've seen this thread sooner!

    I am definitely asocial, but probably not really antisocial (everyone treats them as synonyms though).



    Are we the same person? O.o The only difference seems to be that I joined a club this year, so I'm continually improving my social skills. Yay me!

    A question...do you also tend to avoid people you know if they see you or if they want to hang out? I used to always do this, but I seem to have gotten much better over the years. I've still never asked anyone if they wanted to hang out, though.
    Depends on the person. Usually I have a designated person or two that I feel totally comfortable around and my social life revolves around them and their friend groups. Outside if the key people, meeting others either makes me feel a.) scared/nervous/uncertain or b.) angry. It's only angry when I feel like my time is being needlessly infringed on by people who are only doing it for show or are only doing for themselves not for a connection. Examples would be people who are just in it for the networking/polite society points OR people who just talk at you without listening (my mom).

    Most of the time when talking to new people the major problem is what to say. It's always easier to start as a friend of a friend, and take time to observe the person. Then when you do talk you have a better sense of what they like or what interests them. I think sometimes I seem very stupid because I will answer things very literally or be overly thorough. Like today a friend if my roommates was over and I said hello. He introduces himself and asked how I was liking the apartment and I said it was nice. Ten he said "just watch out for Pete, he's not too good a guy". I couldn't determine if he was joking or serious. I just said okay and it didn't occur to me till later to ask a follow up question.

    My boyfriend says I can come across harsh because I'll neglect to connect the persons opinion with their feelings. I've always just thought you should be allowed to say something doesn't make sense or is irrational if that's what you think. Unless they can prove you wrong they have no right to be upset. He said that this comes across as very aggressive. Of course he is also an ENFJ, he response to a lot of things as if I've just shot Bambi's mom.

  3. #33
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    5w6 sp/sx
    Posts
    17,568

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Pseudo View Post
    I get really anxious in social situations and I don have great social skills. I very rarely look people in the eyes and Ive been told I generally mumble or don't speak clearly. I find I even get worried before things like calling people on the phone or having to talk to a teacher or a sales person. I'm pretty bad about dropping casual conversation conversations though I've very talkative with friends. I have very few people I would consider friends. I have a lot of people I see a lot who I still consider acquaintances because I don't feel comfortable just calling them to hang out. Generally It takes a few weeks for me to open up so most relationships start at school or work where there has been prolonged contact, and even then it's always the other person who has to take it out of that area to a real friendship. I'm really horrible with keeping up with people, calling on the phone and what not. It either seems too draining or I get worried they'll be annoyed. I've never been in clubs or organizations.
    I don't feel real anxiety in social situations. I know I can deal with whatever presents itself, having absorbed enough scripted behavior during my upbringing. My experience bears this out, and I can be very well-received when I put forth the effort. Because the interactions don't come naturally, though, it is effort. If I have no real interest in the event, but am there due to obligation (e.g. extended family event), it can really be a chore. I must keep biting my tongue and not say what I am honestly thinking, while remaining polite to aunts and uncles, etc. and trying to minimize my involvement in what passes for conversation.

    If I have a stake in the event, as in a professional social event, it is another story. The game is on, and I will pursue my own agenda with energy and purpose. It can be almost like a high while it lasts, but I am worn out when it is over. My preferred social events are low-key interactions with a few (or one) close friend/s. These are the only occasions when I feel truly relaxed. They demand the least energy, and provide the greatest reward in social terms. When I can condense one of the other two kinds of events into this, by finding my favorite cousin to chat with in a corner, or an old grad school mate, it helps.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  4. #34
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Mal+ View Post
    You probably have Aspergers or high-level autism.
    It reads more like plain old social anxiety. You're rubbish at diagnosis.

    /anti-social

  5. #35
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    isfp
    Enneagram
    4w5 sp/sx
    Posts
    8,595

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Pseudo View Post
    I get really anxious in social situations and I don have great social skills. I very rarely look people in the eyes and Ive been told I generally mumble or don't speak clearly. I find I even get worried before things like calling people on the phone or having to talk to a teacher or a sales person. I'm pretty bad about dropping casual conversation conversations though I've very talkative with friends. I have very few people I would consider friends. I have a lot of people I see a lot who I still consider acquaintances because I don't feel comfortable just calling them to hang out. Generally It takes a few weeks for me to open up so most relationships start at school or work where there has been prolonged contact, and even then it's always the other person who has to take it out of that area to a real friendship. I'm really horrible with keeping up with people, calling on the phone and what not. It either seems too draining or I get worried they'll be annoyed. I've never been in clubs or organizations.
    I can relate to some of this. I've noticed when teaching music lessons, I catch myself not making eye contact, and so will intentionally try. This may be exaggerated by the fact that some of my students are really shy and don't look at me or say much.

    When I was younger I would feel anxious about social scenarios except for ones that became a bit routine. I would always be friendly to the new kid until they found other friends. Now I mostly just talk about professional topics or philosophical ones, but I get burnout quickly. I now tend to feel okay just sitting there saying nothing. One work environment would have meetings, and the people were very emotive in their communication. I reached a point where I decided to just find a place to sit and not worry about what it looked like. I would get tired and overwhelmed, though.

    Recently I went to lunch with my husband and his two out-of-town friends at a bar, so I was the designated driver. I did talk about animals, but remained quiet the rest of the time. When my husband went to the restroom and I was left alone with the friends, I just looked down and didn't even try to converse. One tried to make a joke, and I sort of smiled, but I could tell they ended up feeling awkward. They're grownups and survived it, so I wasn't that concerned.

    Basically if I shut-down socially, I'm just shut-down, and I'm not mostly okay with that. I don't think it makes me the world's worst menace.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  6. #36
    Theta Male Julius_Van_Der_Beak's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    MBTI
    CROW
    Enneagram
    5w6 sp/so
    Socionics
    LII None
    Posts
    9,044

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Mal+ View Post
    You probably have Aspergers or high-level autism.
    You probably have schizophrenia.
    [Trump's] rhetoric is not an abuse of power. In the same way that it's also not against the law to do a backflip off of the roof of your house onto your concrete driveway. It's just mind-numbingly stupid and, to say the least, counterproductive. - Bush did 9-11


    This is not going to go the way you think....

    Visit my Johari:
    http://kevan.org/johari?name=Birddude78

  7. #37
    your resident asshole
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    4,407

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Pseudo View Post
    Depends on the person. Usually I have a designated person or two that I feel totally comfortable around and my social life revolves around them and their friend groups. Outside if the key people, meeting others either makes me feel a.) scared/nervous/uncertain or b.) angry. It's only angry when I feel like my time is being needlessly infringed on by people who are only doing it for show or are only doing for themselves not for a connection. Examples would be people who are just in it for the networking/polite society points OR people who just talk at you without listening (my mom).
    Angry, huh? That's a bit of an interesting reaction.

    Most of the time when talking to new people the major problem is what to say. It's always easier to start as a friend of a friend, and take time to observe the person. Then when you do talk you have a better sense of what they like or what interests them. I think sometimes I seem very stupid because I will answer things very literally or be overly thorough. Like today a friend if my roommates was over and I said hello. He introduces himself and asked how I was liking the apartment and I said it was nice. Ten he said "just watch out for Pete, he's not too good a guy". I couldn't determine if he was joking or serious. I just said okay and it didn't occur to me till later to ask a follow up question.
    To be fair, it's difficult to gauge whether or not people like that are joking because you just met them. You don't know if he's the kind to be joking.

    Speaking of being unable to read people, I have an awesomely awkward story to tell. One day I was joking around with some friends (note that whenever I said "friend," it's really more like an acquaintance) when I made a joke that sounded a bit odd/perverted. I hadn't meant for it to come out that way, but it did. Well, they stopped laughing and just gave me a weird look. This tiny event bothered me so much that I actually went on Facebook that night and apologized to one of the girls for making the joke. It's not like it was an offensive joke...it was just an awkward remark that lasted for maybe one second. Yeah...don't apologize for being awkward to other people.

  8. #38
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Posts
    795

    Default

    Antisocial or asocial women put out, tend to be wild, and like it rough... I love 'em

    And for those with anxiety, Aniracetam+Noopept. And it'll make you verbally fluent even.

  9. #39
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    isfp
    Enneagram
    4w5 sp/sx
    Posts
    8,595

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by CapLawyer View Post
    Antisocial or asocial women put out, tend to be wild, and like it rough... I love 'em
    In your dreams?

    I suspect you don't understand the concept of asocial.

    Quote Originally Posted by CapLawyer View Post
    And for those with anxiety, Aniracetam+Noopept. And it'll make you verbally fluent even.
    Or just make you think you are?
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  10. #40
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Posts
    795

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by fia View Post
    Or just make you think you are?
    Aniracetam and Noopept are nootropics that are also anxiolytics. They aren't like speed. Niacin also works.

Similar Threads

  1. Anti-social behaviour
    By Survive & Stay Free in forum Politics, History, and Current Events
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 05-22-2012, 08:14 PM
  2. [INTP] INTP's drive towards anti-socialization - a social behaviour!
    By Fluffywolf in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 03-21-2011, 04:47 AM
  3. Social, unsocial and anti-social and type
    By Survive & Stay Free in forum General Psychology
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 07-05-2010, 05:53 AM
  4. For Females: Unanticipated Flattery
    By Totenkindly in forum General Psychology
    Replies: 72
    Last Post: 05-12-2007, 12:29 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO