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  1. #41
    WALMART
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    You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend: Those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.

  2. #42
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    Jul 2013
    MBTI
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    729 sx/sp
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    I googled murder.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  3. #43
    Senior Member
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    Dec 2008
    Posts
    4,226

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    "I'm worried, Ray. It's getting crowded in there and all my data points to something big on the horizon."
    "What do you mean, 'big'?"
    "Well, let's say this Twinkie represents the normal amount of psychokinetic energy in the New York area. Based on this morning's sample, it would be a Twinkie... thirty-five feet long, weighing approximately six hundred pounds."
    [Ray coughs]
    "That's a big Twinkie."

  4. #44
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    May 2007
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    12,152

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    You're out of order! You're out of order! The whole trial is out of order!
    My client, the honorable Henry T. Fleming, should go right to fucking jail! The son of a bitch is guilty!

  5. #45
    Banned
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    Mar 2012
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    Will
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    Default

    Never tell me the odds!

  6. #46
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
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    Apr 2007
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    You'll get nothing and like it!

  7. #47
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Posts
    4,226

    Default

    You see, according to Cocteau's plan, I'm the enemy. 'Cause I like to think, I like to read; I'm into freedom of speech, and freedom of choice. I'm the kind of guy who likes to sit in a greasy spoon and wonder "Gee, should I have the T-bone steak or the jumbo rack of barbecued ribs with the side order of gravy fries?" I WANT high cholesterol. I wanna eat bacon and butter and BUCKETS of cheese, okay? I want to smoke a Cuban cigar the size of Cincinnati in the non-smoking section. I want to run through the streets naked with green Jell-O all over my body reading Playboy magazine. Why? Because I suddenly might feel the need to, okay pal? I've SEEN the future. Do you know what it is? It's a 47-year-old virgin sitting around in his beige pajamas, drinking a banana-broccoli shake, singing "I'm an Oscar Meyer wiener".

  8. #48
    Permabanned
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    May 2007
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    -You got full coverage on that truck?
    -Liability only! (beat) Don't even think about it!

    (Try guessing what movie that's from!)

  9. #49
    violaine
    Guest

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    You may keep one of your children. The other one must go.

  10. #50
    violaine
    Guest

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    I know you'll think this is crazy, but all I want to do is hold you, and I think that if you'll let me do that just for a few seconds, I can walk away, and never speak to you again.

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