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  1. #1
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Default From DJ to AA How do I come across?

    After @DJ Arendee 's thread on how people perceived him, I wondered about the same in regards to myself.

    However I was really nervous about making this thread because it seemed attention seeking and ego-tistical when I did it. Not to mention copycatish.

    However it is a question I've been curious about for a long time, definitely before I came here. And I imagine it is a question every person asks themselves from time to time. But to me it does seem an important one, even though I can never find anyone willing to discuss it offline, since others have the propensity to spot your foibles that you don't necessarily see yourself.

    Because of this it can be a good exercise in growth and admittance of my or others faults.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

  2. #2
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    you can't copy a common idea.

    You come off as... judging harshly in the moment but moving on rather quickly. Sometimes its hard to tell where you stand with me. Your art is cool and past that I don't know much about you. I sometimes feel like you're telling me I'm a dumbass in some respect, and then treating me as if I'm not a dumbass in other respects.


  3. #3
    Retired Nicki's Avatar
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    You're probably one of the nicest members on this site.
    I really like cats and food.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Open and, at the same time, withdrawn.

  5. #5
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    you can't copy a common idea.

    You come off as... judging harshly in the moment but moving on rather quickly. Sometimes its hard to tell where you stand with me. Your art is cool and past that I don't know much about you. I sometimes feel like you're telling me I'm a dumbass in some respect, and then treating me as if I'm not a dumbass in other respects.

    I think that's a very perceptive assessment. I tend to try and look at the world in what I see as a balanced manner, but is probably more mercurial and based on my mood as opposed to judging things on an individual perspective. This extends to how I look at a person, which is probably why I come across as one moment respecting your intelligence on one matter and not on another.

    Frankly I apologise, because I think it's usually just a projection or some kind of emotional mood swing I'm not fully aware of when I do that, which of all explanations does not excuse it in the least. As for where I stand, I actually don't know myself, I find my view of a person changes all the time as more information becomes available. Also I tend to be naturally quite private, I do it automatically without really noticing how little I let on, even to those who have known me all my life.
    Even when I am chatty and loud in a comfortable setting all I usually show is my enthusiasm for certain ideas and jokes.

    I sometimes wonder if that stand-offish and private nature is a bit...well uncomfortable for people?


    Quote Originally Posted by Aleda View Post
    You're probably one of the nicest members on this site.
    I dunno. I don't think of myself as being that nice, sometimes I think I'm a bit of an arsehole to be honest and I take it too far.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

  6. #6
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    A lot of what you said above makes sense.

    You seem confused, unsure of yourself, lacking in self-knowledge.

    You also, as you say, seem to judge, but, also as you say, that judging is not based on much substantive, really -- it's just based on your passing mood. As such, I don't really respect it. (It actually reminds me a bit of a certain era of @Ginkgo's posting.) But, then, sometimes, more recently, I've noticed, you provide some degree of reasoning for your judgments (perhaps these ones are more grounded in reality than just your mood [or you're trying to figure out what the reasoning for your judgments might be, perhaps]), and sometimes that reasoning is actually pretty decent (other times not). (And often I just don't have time to read your posts.)

    All in all, I perceive you as a bit scared, unsure of yourself, but trying to figure it out. And I feel a bit bad for you, because, well, it seems like you have some difficulty doing so. I don't think you, for various reasons, possibly (including functional), are in the strongest position to do so. I commend you for the struggle, though.
    Last edited by Vasilisa; 07-07-2013 at 11:00 AM. Reason: per request

  7. #7
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zarathustra View Post
    A lot of what you said above makes sense.

    You seem confused, unsure of yourself, lacking in self-knowledge.

    You also, as you say, seem to judge, but, also as you say, that judging is not based on anything substantive -- it's just based on your passing mood. As such, I don't really respect it. (It actually reminds me a bit of a certain era of @Ginkgo's posting.) But, then, sometimes, more recently, I've noticed, you provide some degree of reasoning for your judgments (perhaps these ones are more grounded in reality than just your mood [or you're trying to figure out what that reasoning is]), and sometimes that reasoning is actually pretty decent (sometimes not).

    All in all, I perceive you as a bit scared, unsure of yourself, but trying to figure it out.
    This seems accurate as well. I sometimes wonder if my lack of assurity stems from an environment that craved assurity and tried to bring that out by force, which I rejected in a contrary manner?

    I tend to reject judgement and certainty in general, because I believe I associate it with those negative experiences. However I also acknowledge that this is not a very efficient or fair judgement of my own to make, since it often means I throw out useful information as well.

    Lacking in self-knowledge I definitely agree with. It's what led me to this theory.

    So far it seems there are more questions than answers and I had hoped that pushing myself to go beyond my comfort zone into the world would reveal more about myself as well as growing through the conflicts that would and have arisen.

    I suspect I will end up being one of those people who only starts to understand themselves and appreciate life once they are in their mid-40's.

    Which I've always thought was a bit of a shame and yet there is no real ruling on what point a life should become enjoyable, most of it is up to the individual and how they make it so.

    Slightly off topic and more MBTI wise but aside from my own actions and reactions, which functions would my lack of self-knowledge stem from? If I can even make that call. Lack of well developed introverted judging? Maybe lack of thinking.

    I will say that I often feel removed from the immediate moment and I find it very hard to make quick decisions, especially if I am rushed to a choice I am not yet sure of. But the world around me and the life I lead, which comes from the decisions I HAVE made, does not lend itself to such patience.

    One last thing I will say is I also have a hard time expressing my true emotions openly, especially anger.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.

  8. #8
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    I like you, so good. I don't think you have many flaws, I haven't had a lengthy convo with you in awhile so i could be forgetting stuff

    anyways I thought this was gonna be a post by someone else about how they used to be a dj became an addict because of the dj like and joined aa. SOrry my mind goes places
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    This seems accurate as well. I sometimes wonder if my lack of assurity stems from an environment that craved assurity and tried to bring that out by force, which I rejected in a contrary manner?
    Yes, there seems to be something like this (transference).

    I think I've read comments by you about your father.


    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    I tend to reject judgement and certainty in general, because I believe I associate it with those negative experiences. However I also acknowledge that this is not a very efficient or fair judgement of my own to make, since it often means I throw out useful information as well.
    Yeah.

    This is one of the things I didn't like about you early on.

    I think your behavior has adjusted slightly recently, and I've taken a bit more of a liking because of it.

    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    Lacking in self-knowledge I definitely agree with. It's what led me to this theory.

    So far it seems there are more questions than answers and I had hoped that pushing myself to go beyond my comfort zone into the world would reveal more about myself as well as growing through the conflicts that would and have arisen.

    I suspect I will end up being one of those people who only starts to understand themselves and appreciate life once they are in their mid-40's.

    Which I've always thought was a bit of a shame and yet there is no real ruling on what point a life should become enjoyable, most of it is up to the individual and how they make it so.
    Just keep plugging away.

    You'll get t(/somew)here.

    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    Slightly off topic and more MBTI wise but aside from my own actions and reactions, which functions would my lack of self-knowledge stem from? If I can even make that call. Lack of well developed introverted judging? Maybe lack of thinking.
    Yeah, you've pretty much got it.

    You seem very Fe to me, and I don't think that lends itself well.

    Introverted judging definitely helps; so does T, to a lesser extent (and only if properly exercised).

    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    I will say that I often feel removed from the immediate moment and I find it very hard to make quick decisions, especially if I am rushed to a choice I am not yet sure of.
    This sounds very 6ish.

    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    One last thing I will say is I also have a hard time expressing my true emotions openly, especially anger.
    That seems apparent as well.

    Not sure if it's cuz of Fe (which makes sense), or cuz of historical issues.

  10. #10
    Retired Nicki's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    I dunno. I don't think of myself as being that nice, sometimes I think I'm a bit of an arsehole to be honest and I take it too far.
    Everyone does that sort of thing. You seem to do it a lot less though.
    I really like cats and food.

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