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  1. #1
    WALMART
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    Default The Legend That is jontherobot - Part I

    jontherobot. Let's take a moment to explore the myth, the mystery, the enigma that is Jonathan Lyn Lawrence. Born in 1988 August 18th, Jon came out head first and damn near albino. He was one of the few babies born with hair. Hair so delicate it appeared as if engineered by the finest of Italian tailors. He came out quietly with no tears and that's how his mother knew, he would be a special one. By the age of twelve Jon read all the complete works of Parmenides and added some of his own Philosophy to it. Like Parmenides, Jon concluded that the senses convey an illusion and pure thought determines the pure nature of being which cannot be contradicted, therefore change is an illusion. But he took Parmenides teachings to further levels challenging the oral tradition by challenging people to define abstract concepts like justice, truth and beauty. Jon then continued to write his Pulitzer Prize winning book entitled Corrupters of Moral. By the age of 13, Jon was a bonafide genius. Tune in next time for more on the life of Jonathan.

    -NasGodsSon

  2. #2
    Doesn't Read Your Posts Haight's Avatar
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    What do you think the accuracy rate is on this first post? And can I expect similar misinformation in the future?
    "The only time I'm wrong is when I'm questioning myself."
    Haight

  3. #3
    WALMART
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    Low, and yes.

  4. #4
    Doesn't Read Your Posts Haight's Avatar
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    Perfect.

    *subscribes to thread*
    "The only time I'm wrong is when I'm questioning myself."
    Haight

  5. #5
    Permabanned
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    Jeez, I looked at the title and thought this was another banned thread like MacGuffin's. Don't play like that, man!

  6. #6
    WALMART
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Ü View Post
    Jeez, I looked at the title and thought this was another banned thread like MacGuffin's. Don't play like that, man!

    I don't plan on going anywhere anytime soon.










    Though I am glad my potential departure struck such chords in your psyche.

  7. #7
    WALMART
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    Default The Legend that is jontherobot - Part II

    A few months before his 14th birthday, adoloscent Jon was glaring through his telescope when he noticed an unsual coloration in the red eye of Jupiter. He joted down notes and drew a picture as accurate as he could. He would then spend the next few months regulary studying these awe-inspiring colorations. One fine day, he finally completed the puzzle and realized that two days out of the month, prolonged staring of the orangish tint of Jupiter's red eye would give one the power to regurgitate pure protein despite one's last meal. He used this powers to make what he called Lyn Juice, or a virile version of Muscle Builder. Using this Lyn Juice and a strict schedule dependant on the position of Jupiter, he became a World Class Wrestler with winnings including but not limited to the WCF. Tune in next time for more tales of the life of Jonathan Lyn Lawrence.

    -NasGodsSon

  8. #8
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Alert me when he enters the porn business.

  9. #9
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jontherobot View Post
    A few months before his 14th birthday, adoloscent Jon was glaring through his telescope when he noticed an unsual coloration in the red eye of Jupiter. He joted down notes and drew a picture as accurate as he could. He would then spend the next few months regulary studying these awe-inspiring colorations. One fine day, he finally completed the puzzle and realized that two days out of the month, prolonged staring of the orangish tint of Jupiter's red eye would give one the power to regurgitate pure protein despite one's last meal. He used this powers to make what he called Lyn Juice, or a virile version of Muscle Builder. Using this Lyn Juice and a strict schedule dependant on the position of Jupiter, he became a World Class Wrestler with winnings including but not limited to the WCF. Tune in next time for more tales of the life of Jonathan Lyn Lawrence.

    -NasGodsSon
    :yawn:
    You already told us that story in vent :/
    06/13 10:51:03 five sounds: you!!!
    06/13 10:51:08 shortnsweet: no you!!
    06/13 10:51:12 shortnsweet: go do your things and my things too!
    06/13 10:51:23 five sounds: oh hell naw
    06/13 10:51:55 shortnsweet: !!!!
    06/13 10:51:57 shortnsweet: (cries)
    06/13 10:52:19 RiftsWRX: You two are like furbies stuck in a shoe box

    My Nohari
    My Johari
    by sns.

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