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  1. #61
    Senior Member Chaotic Harmony's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bologna View Post
    Fair enough,* if you want to get into technicalities. What about the first sentence--the one that I asked you to address?

    *well, not really
    I guess this was sort of, kind of addressed above.

    Okay, fine. @Chaotic Harmony, did you mean "pleasantly surprised"? Because, if so, my assertion is not biased and it is relevant.

    Or whatever pseudological fluff I want to throw out there to support my visceral feelings on the matter, so that I match Speed's argument tactics.
    Since I've been directly asked... I'll try to be as specific and detailed as possible as to not leave any ridiculous loopholes.

    My husband has done many things that surprised me because they were unexpected and unnecessary. I've always been pleasantly surprised and very grateful when he does these things. However, if he were to suddenly stop doing these things I certainly wouldn't think any less of him or love him any less.

    I won't go into all the reasons we love each other, but I assure you it has nothing to do with any preconceived expectations.


  2. #62
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Speed Gavroche View Post
    No. That's what you believe. For example you can believe that being good at bed is not the first criteria from a man when he seeks a woman. But it's the case, even if heseems to say the contrary.

    For example he can say "I really like Barbara, she is really intelligent and have an interesting conversation"

    He truly means "I want to fuck Barbara"
    If you are going to try to put words in peoples' mouths which directly contradict their explicitly expressed opinions, there is no point in discussion, since you will dismiss any evidence that contradicts the the figments of your own imagination. Either I am correct, or my SO and I have lived a lie for over 10 years. You are welcome to your misconceptions, but I (fortunately) experience the happier reality of the situation.

    Quote Originally Posted by Speed Gavroche View Post
    We are all differents and but iterpersonal relationships are ruled by individual, subjective universals objectives principles. One of them is that I want men need above all a woman who is good at bed and good cook, and who needs that women need a man who is good at bed and stronger than her.
    Fixed.* Now you're good. Simplistic, limited, and irrational perhaps, but at least internally consistent.

    *You can take care of your own typos.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  3. #63
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    Mod Note:

    I moved several pages of Speed-isms here that were derailing the other thread. Please respect the OP and bless this thread with the same quality and caliber of posts that the author of this thread has shared with you.

    Play ball!
    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux

    Johari/Nohari

  4. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Mod Note:

    I moved several pages of Speed-isms here that were derailing the other thread. Please respect the OP and bless this thread with the same quality and caliber of posts that the author of this thread has shared with you.

    Play ball!
    You shrank my thread's size! How emasculating.

  5. #65
    Senior Member Survive & Stay Free's Avatar
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    That's a lot of balls.

    If that were all that mattered to me I'd be in a relationship right now and I'd not have been single for years either.

  6. #66
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    You shrank my thread's size! How emasculating.
    Oh sheezy, for a second I read "thread" a different way and wanted to laugh.

    But yeah...anyhow...I'm still laughing...AT YOUR EMASCULATION!!?!?!?
    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux

    Johari/Nohari

  7. #67
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  8. #68
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Speed Gavroche View Post
    The 2 top criterias for a man to choose a female partner are

    1: does she fuck well?

    2: does she cook well?

    That's all. The rest, intelligence, humor etc, are just possibles bonus assets who must not enter in conflict with the 2 top criterias. The thing is that the more educated they are, the more "intelligents" women seem to forget that if they can't bring good sex and good food to their men, they make his life miserable and can't save that with a master degree or a nobel price.

    Education is fine when it's on the field of dance, art, litterature, singing, dramtic art some philosophy, for example, theses things which can help a woman to develop her beauty and sensuality, to have a beautiful spirit and a beautiful mind. Elsewhere, a woman who has an IQ of 145, has a master degree in finance, work 50 hours per week, don't want kids or do the laundry, can't cook and can't dance and have no sensuality is not attractive.

    The intelligents women who keep in mind that men have no problem with their intelligence as long as they are sensual, naturally caring, do the laundry, value greatly the opinion of thier man and are ready to put their career in second place to raise the kids have nor particular problem to find a man.
    Interestingly, I don't disagree with this in a general way. I think there are a majority of men who, if they could find a woman like this, would consider it nirvana. Madonna-like purity combined with she-devil energy ... a woman who's beautiful, a sex goddess, gourmet chef, nurturing mother, cleaning service and perfectly doting wife who totally puts her man on a pedestal. What ordinary man would say no to that?

    Don't forget, smart to boot! Does all of the above AND still cultivates her mind (of course, to the benefit of her man first then herself), can indulge in intelligent discourse, provide wise counsel - what man wouldn't subscribe to this fantasy woman? She would be divine.


    But the thing is that "intelligents" women are often not like this, so men prefer less inteligents women. That's all. And that has nothing to do with "insecurity". The "insecurity" bullshit is just the rationalization of all theses "intelligents" women who are ugly, have no sensuality, can't dance and can't date.

    Intelligence doesn't make insecure. An ugly bookworm with a IQ of 145 who has not physical assets or emotional intelligence doesn' make anybody insecure.

    That's it.
    This though I disagree with.

    Men can certainly be insecure creatures, and can be utterly threatened and emasculated by a woman with demonstrably superior intelligence. Prove me wrong.

    You realize, don't you, in outlining the above, all you are doing is defining what YOU aspire to find - this image of female perfection, drawn partially by reality, partly though fiction, but also influenced by gender roles, physiology and by social convention.

    You want a woman who is better than you in every way? But hides her light to help you feel better about yourself? Ultimate hypocrisy. This is why most responders to your post object to what you have had to say. You want your cake and you want to eat it too.

    But what do you have to offer? Anything?

    Love is about what you DO for each other, not simply about what you ARE, what you GET - do you see that? Do you understand what I am getting at? Would you find it helpful for me to explain this to you?
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

  9. #69
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Learning is an acquired taste because it causes cognitive dissonance which is emotionally painful.

    So if we don't have a taste for learning, we won't find someone who loves learning to be to our taste.

  10. #70
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    So if we don't have a taste for learning, we won't find someone who loves learning to be to our taste.
    Since there is truth here, we need not write it with a capital T.

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