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  1. #21
    will make your day Carebear's Avatar
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    I've seen it a lot in TV series and movies lately as well. It's becoming more and more common, and imho it's the same thing as girls jumping up on tables to be saved from spiders (assuming they're not arachnophobic). It sends the "see, I'm vulnerable, I need all the help and support I can get" message, and is subconsciously done to manipulate. Most girls drop it or refine it before they become adult. I've also seen boys do it, but they tend to drop it when puberty kicks in.
    I have arms for a fucking reaosn, so come hold me. Then we'll fuvk! Whoooooh! - GZA

  2. #22
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carebear View Post
    I've seen it a lot in TV series and movies lately as well. It's becoming more and more common, and imho it's the same thing as girls jumping up on tables to be saved from spiders (assuming they're not arachnophobic). It sends the "see, I'm vulnerable, I need all the help and support I can get" message, and is subconsciously done to manipulate. Most girls drop it or refine it before they become adult. I've also seen boys do it, but they tend to drop it when puberty kicks in.
    Ugh I remember highschool, whenever their was a bug or an insect some of the girls would run away and scream, me being annoyed would kill the bug and then they'd be like "Oh my God! I can't believe you did that" and it's like it's a bug it's less then an ounce and this is why I spent lunch sleeping on the couch in the counselors office. I mean if it weren't for the annoyiness of teenage girls I'd probably would have left it alone of course I would probably track it to entertain myself during class. Besides bugs are no where near becoming extinct, I'm sure the spider population can sacrifice one of it's own to the bottom of my shoe. Btw I would only get up if it was class like art where it was lax and could do what ever you wanted as long as you got your work done.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  3. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carebear View Post
    I've seen it a lot in TV series and movies lately as well. It's becoming more and more common, and imho it's the same thing as girls jumping up on tables to be saved from spiders (assuming they're not arachnophobic). It sends the "see, I'm vulnerable, I need all the help and support I can get" message, and is subconsciously done to manipulate. Most girls drop it or refine it before they become adult. I've also seen boys do it, but they tend to drop it when puberty kicks in.
    It is one thing to play things up in sexual/romantic flirting type situations depending on the tastes of the persons you do that with. My sister in law baby talked my brother all the years of their marriage and he seemed to like it... but in business or at school, it is just totally off the wall and strange.

    Men don't always drop this sort of thing off either, my husband will use this tone with me that sugary sweet and I go "Oh gosh, here it comes" I know it is going to be something unreasonable and totally J request coming my way...but for goodness sakes he doesn't carry on like that with anyone else, especially at work!

  4. #24
    will make your day Carebear's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    It is one thing to play things up in sexual/romantic flirting type situations depending on the tastes of the persons you do that with. My sister in law baby talked my brother all the years of their marriage and he seemed to like it... but in business or at school, it is just totally off the wall and strange.

    Men don't always drop this sort of thing off either, my husband will use this tone with me that sugary sweet and I go "Oh gosh, here it comes" I know it is going to be something unreasonable and totally J request coming my way...but for goodness sakes he doesn't carry on like that with anyone else, especially at work!
    I know, but 16 year old girls often haven't had time to fully comprehend the difference yet. They've realized it works with some people (read: males), but haven't learned when not to do it yet. Some of them will still be wearing way too much make up as well, and it's the same thing. They've realized it's effective, but haven't quite figured out how best to apply it yet. I agree they should have dropped/refined it by that age, but observe that this often isn't the case.
    I have arms for a fucking reaosn, so come hold me. Then we'll fuvk! Whoooooh! - GZA

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carebear View Post
    I know, but 16 year old girls often haven't had time to fully comprehend the difference yet. They've realized it works with some people (read: males), but haven't learned when not to do it yet. Some of them will still be wearing way too much make up as well, and it's the same thing. They've realized it's effective, but haven't quite figured out how best to apply it yet. I agree they should have dropped/refined it by that age, but observe that this often isn't the case.
    Yes, sorry I was talking more about the 20-40 year olds that I see still doing it. Women who are old enough to realize it is going to have an opposite reaction with most other women than they imagine it is going to. I find it so often when having to interact with doctor's or dentist's offices especially. It was really bad when my Dad was alive and there was always some serious (to me) business to be conducting in regards his care and I had to deal with Dora Ditzy, giggling and cooing like a underdeveloped moron on the other end.

    As far as I am concerned, the OP might consider that it is not doing these girls a service to allow them to go on doing their baby talk without comment, but I also realize that as fellow INF it is not always easy to confront others either.

  6. #26
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
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    My daughter does this. I have a pat answer for her: "I might consider it, if an 8 year old asks me someday, but not for a baby."
    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -anonymous graffiti in the basilica at Pompeii

  7. #27
    Highly Hollow Wandering's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carebear View Post
    I've seen it a lot in TV series and movies lately as well. It's becoming more and more common, and imho it's the same thing as girls jumping up on tables to be saved from spiders (assuming they're not arachnophobic). It sends the "see, I'm vulnerable, I need all the help and support I can get" message, and is subconsciously done to manipulate. Most girls drop it or refine it before they become adult. I've also seen boys do it, but they tend to drop it when puberty kicks in.
    Looks like once again, we're back to the everlasting discussion about gender roles in our society What is expected of men and women? How does each gender look at itself and at the other? What subconscious messages do the two sexes send each other, which ones work, which ones don't?

    FWIW: I *will* jump on the table to avoid a spider, but I can take care of the rats if you want

  8. #28
    will make your day Carebear's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    Yes, sorry I was talking more about the 20-40 year olds that I see still doing it.
    Ah, ok. Yes, that's just stupid.

    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    As far as I am concerned, the OP might consider that it is not doing these girls a service to allow them to go on doing their baby talk without comment, but I also realize that as fellow INF it is not always easy to confront others either.
    I've only worked with 16 year old girls for a couple of months in the past (part of the education), but I think this is where I'll end up (16-19). I agree about confronting them, and realized when reading this that what I did was to answer them in the same tone. Some got the hint right away, while others got a bit annoyed/uncertain and asked "why do you keep doing that?" I answered "doing what?" They: "Talking with the baby voice to me, you don't use it when talking to others." I: "I do it because you do it. You don't use that voice when talking to others but me either". (Adding a teasing/knowing grin.) That drove it through to them without appearing to be a real confrontation. (Though some pretended to be a bit offended, while not quite able to hide their amusement.)

    Quote Originally Posted by Wandering View Post
    Looks like once again, we're back to the everlasting discussion about gender roles in our society What is expected of men and women? How does each gender look at itself and at the other? What subconscious messages do the two sexes send each other, which ones work, which ones don't?
    Ah, yes. I so wish men and women could behave the way they bloody well wanted, but fat chance. Incentives and sanctions will make certain behavioural patterns form.

    Quote Originally Posted by Wandering View Post
    FWIW: I *will* jump on the table to avoid a spider, but I can take care of the rats if you want
    Well, if you're actually afraid of spiders, it's a different thing entirely. I know several men who'd jump on the table to avoid spiders as well (don't they know spiders are excellent climbers? ) What I'm talking about are those who aren't really afraid, but who will jump up there because they feel it's expected from them.
    I have arms for a fucking reaosn, so come hold me. Then we'll fuvk! Whoooooh! - GZA

  9. #29
    Highly Hollow Wandering's Avatar
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    Add-on.

    Someone asked me privately if I do the baby voice trick on women too (seeing as I am a woman myself...) The thing is: it's a communication/manipulation problem/trick, so even though I did mention gender roles in my previous post, it's not *exclusively* about gender roles.

    More clearly:
    * there are both men and women who make me nervous and set off my higher voice against my control
    * but there are also both men and women who don't make me feel nervous like that.
    * Similarly, there are both men and women who happily give in to the baby voice trick,
    * but there are also both men and women who don't take such nonsense.

    Some examples of women with whom it works are:
    - some old women,
    - some socially and/or professionally powerful women who are used to and enjoy bossing other people around,
    - some teachers (back when I was in school),
    - some clerks in banks, stores, social services offices, and so on...

    Basically, there are both men and women who like it better when I play it dumber or younger than they are, or helpless, or generally lower than them in this or that scale. Some version or other of the baby voice works better on them than my normal voice/demeanor, so I give them what they like, which in turn prompts them to give me what I ask for. Everyone wins.

    The thing is, though, that when I do it, it doesn't sound, look or feel as contrived as it is described here. I don't go around coldly measuring people up and putting on acts to please them. It's much more an instinctive thing, which started when I was a kid and was expected by *some* people to act this or that way just because I was a kid. That's when I learned that there are people who like it better if they can cast me into a role. And since I am such a people-pleaser, I never had a reason to rebel against that, so instead I just played along. It grew and grew over the years, getting constantly reinforced and more detailed. Now it's as natural to me as choosing which language to use depending on who I'm talking to (French for my parents, English for my husband, and so on). Different language, different level of vocabulary, different attitude, and yes even different voice: I automatically adapt depending on what I guess people would prefer me to be.

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