User Tag List

12 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 13

  1. #1
    Senior Member lucibelle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    I__P
    Enneagram
    4 sp
    Posts
    138

    Red face Omigawd...found a ridiculous poem I wrote when I was 15

    For some time now I've been wondering about this one poem I remember writing when I was younger...All I remembered about the actual poem was that it had the word "chateau" in it, that I was inspired to write it by some seriously weird website...but I couldn't find it anywhere so I supposed that it was lost forever.
    But just now! I found some ridiculous DeviantArt account I had had when I was 15! The "art" were 3 badly done photomanipulations (one of which was on my own photo and was the lamest thing ever) and a poem - AND IT WAS THIS GODDAMN POEM I'D BEEN WONDERING ABOUT RECENTLY.

    So here I present you with a very, very ridiculous poem

    _

    Forlorn Hope


    Grief now rules this realm where I lay
    It was never meant to end this way
    But my fate was determined
    Thou are here, all my notes thou find


    Do thou know, whom I pursue?
    How did thou find thine way through
    All their warnings, didn’t thou hear?
    Thou know this place they fear?

    I still remember
    My past, the pain
    How all my screams
    They were in vain

    No one was there to hear me
    The agony I still can feel
    The invocation left unfinished
    For hope, for love, I wished

    Fierce spirits haunted me
    Where could I go anymore?
    For a refuge I sought
    Only to be lost in thoughts
    That aren’t my own
    They begun to drag me down
    In them, I slowly drowned

    I still remember
    My past, the pain
    How all my screams
    They were in vain

    Do thou know, whom I pursue?
    How did thou find thine way through
    All their warnings, didn’t thou hear?
    Thou know this place they fear?

    A cursed chateau
    15 decades ago
    Where I lay
    It was never meant to end this way
    Thy delight, here and now…?
    I’m watching thou,
    Thee I know,
    So well…
    And we long for
    Oblivion

    I still remember
    My past, the pain
    How all my screams
    They were in vain

    Oblivion, I long for thee,
    Bless me, o set me free!
    Oblivion,
    Dwelt in a nightmarish trance
    My path was wrong, no 2nd chance
    No 2nd chance,
    No oblivion,
    No 2nd chance,
    No 2nd chance!

    I still remember
    My past, the pain
    How all my screams
    They were in vain


    _

    ...I managed to guess the password and deleted the account.
    Apparently I had some email address called "darkness_is_beautiful_90@yahoo.com"...
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Teh annoying/boring.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Qre:us's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    4,909

    Default

    That's pretty good for a 15 years old. You were already playing around with some techniques to evoke different tones/moods through your writing, e.g., repetition. Thanks for sharing.

    Although, the content reminds me of stereotypical teenage girl angst [including your email addy].

  3. #3
    Patron Saint Of Smileys Gloriana's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    6w5
    Socionics
    INFJ
    Posts
    950

    Default

    That is awesome. It's just plain awesome.

    I have notebooks full of stuff like that from when I was fifteen/sixteen and you know what's weird? I shoved a lot of 'thee', 'thy', and 'thou' into my poems all the time back then too. What's with that? Elizabethan English lends weight to our suffering? lol

    Thanks for sharing and it's great you have a sense of humor about it.
    "Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get, but if you work really hard, and you're kind, amazing things will happen. I'm telling you...amazing things will happen" --Conan O'Brien

  4. #4
    Senior Member lucibelle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    I__P
    Enneagram
    4 sp
    Posts
    138

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Qre:us View Post
    Although, the content reminds me of stereotypical teenage girl angst [including your email addy].
    Haha I never did write from emotion, though, I just kind of came up with stories that weren't at all related to me.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Teh annoying/boring.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Qre:us's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    4,909

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by lucibelle View Post
    Haha I never did write from emotion, though, I just kind of came up with stories that weren't at all related to me.
    I can relate to that (I do the same, to this day, with my own creative writing - for me, it's a way of exploring a thought, not necessarily because it's important to me personally, but, because I got really curious about it).

    Were you an E.A. Poe fan? I never got into "goth" culture - except I was thoroughly entranced by Gothic literature, in my mid-teens.

  6. #6
    Senior Member lucibelle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    I__P
    Enneagram
    4 sp
    Posts
    138

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Qre:us View Post
    I can relate to that (I do the same, to this day, with my own creative writing - for me, it's a way of exploring a thought, not necessarily because it's important to me personally, but, because I got really curious about it).
    Yup. I tried to write from emotion once, and it was kind of lame...repeating things, over and over and over, with little structure. It was really different from others I wrote. An interesting experiment, still.

    Quote Originally Posted by Qre:us View Post
    Were you an E.A. Poe fan? I never got into "goth" culture - except I was thoroughly entranced by Gothic literature, in my mid-teens.
    Unfortunately not, reading his stuff is one of those things on my massive mental list of things I should do, books I should read, movies I should watch etc...and I seem to hardly ever get to complete some of them while the list just keeps getting longer and longer :steam: Well, at least it's a good thing in some manner as it means there is still much for me to experience. I'm definitely not someone who would want to kill themselves. There are just too many interesting things people have created.
    People are quite despicable beings in general, what with destroying ourselves and all, but they can be so creative!

    Hmm, I was kind of into "goth culture" I guess. Still am. Never been a goth myself though.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Teh annoying/boring.

  7. #7
    Scream down the boulevard LadyJaye's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    7w6 so/sx
    Posts
    2,077

    Default

    Nothing quite like putting teen angst into rhyme. I found some of mine that were so unfortunate, I threw them away from me and stomped on them.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Qre:us's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    4,909

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by LadyJaye View Post
    Nothing quite like putting teen angst into rhyme. I found some of mine that were so unfortunate, I threw them away from me and stomped on them.
    You may miss them when you are 70 years old, and wondering what you were like as a teen. Although, I've destroyed plenty of my own childhood stuff after reviewing at a later date.

  9. #9
    Scream down the boulevard LadyJaye's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    7w6 so/sx
    Posts
    2,077

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Qre:us View Post
    You may miss them when you are 70 years old, and wondering what you were like as a teen. Although, I've destroyed plenty of my own childhood stuff after reviewing at a later date.
    I reserve the right to embarrass myself all over again with my bad poetry!


    Actually, I am very careful about what I throw out precisely because it is sometimes good to have a reminder of what it felt like to be thrust into the world without a fully formed brain.

  10. #10
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    Pretty complex for a fifteen year old. Don't be too embarassed. Good use of vocab. I approve.

    The thees and thous are a bit much, though. Also, I bet you're an INFP.

Similar Threads

  1. When someone asserts to be true something you find ridiculous...
    By ygolo in forum Philosophy and Spirituality
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 10-09-2014, 09:33 AM
  2. #1 Song when you turned 15
    By Speed Gavroche in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 50
    Last Post: 03-30-2011, 01:05 AM
  3. Someone I know when I was a child. What his type ?
    By A.H. in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 09-20-2010, 11:18 AM
  4. Have you ever known when someone was dying?
    By Flutterby in forum Philosophy and Spirituality
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 08-03-2010, 07:25 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO