And you make a great point. I feel like people on here are always trying to make me better myself and it's so nice but pressuring I guess I'm too doubtful and rely too much on what's been instead of what could be. What's been hasn't ever lasted very long, so you get comfortable with it. Any time I try to keep anything alive it eventually fizzles out, so I've grown to expect it because fulfilling an expectation feels better than continuous disappointment. A mindset I do need to change tbqh. Have you managed to reach/are you reaching this maximum output? A real life success story might produce some extra motivation!