I hope today is a slow day at work. Everyone likes busy days and they all have the same reason: It makes the day go by faster.
"Ugh, it's so busy today!"
"Makes the day go by faster."
"Man, EVERYONE's calling me today!"
I have job security. I don't need people calling me for that. I also don't need people calling me to make my day go by faster. I could sit here all freakin' day long doing absolutely nothing for work if I wanted to, just surfing the web and watching movies, posting in forums or even looking at pornographic pictures and no one would know and everyone would think/assume I was busy all day. Anything I didn't get around to doing would actually be further proof to my boss and the rest of the people I work with of how high my workload is.
So, as I was saying, I hope today is slow so my co-worker will have time to turn on the House episodes he recorded overnight.
"I see you're drinking 1%. Is that because you think you're FAT? 'Cause you're not. You could be drinking whole milk if you wanted to."