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Thread: Random Thought Thread

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    Quote Originally Posted by Red Herring View Post
    There is normal shyness and there is social phobia (or other related conditions), there is going through adolescence - which always sucks to a certain degree - an there is unnecessary suffering from things that can be helped. That doesn't mean that the first councelor you meet is automatically the right one or that a miracle will happen overnight, but if you feel that your quality of life is seriously suffering, that is a good enough reason to keep looking for somebody or something out there to help you make things a little easier for yourself.
    Last year, I decided to talk to a councelor about my shyness, but I was too shy. Maybe I'll get the courage to seek help some day, but as of now I am simply too shy. I find this awfully tragicomical.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Noll View Post
    Last year, I decided to talk to a councelor about my shyness, but I was too shy. Maybe I'll get the courage to seek help some day, but as of now I am simply too shy. I find this awfully tragicomical.
    Well, that's a first step. It's a good thing you're open to it and when you're ready you can try again. The day will come.
    The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge. Neither love without knowledge, nor knowledge without love can produce a good life. - Bertrand Russell
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    Quote Originally Posted by Red Herring View Post
    Well, that's a first step. It's a good thing you're open to it and when you're ready you can try again. The day will come.
    I am so tired of constantly thinking about the future though, what if I want things to happen NOW? Things never do, and maybe you are right, perhaps that's life. It just sucks.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Noll View Post
    I am so tired of constantly thinking about the future though, what if I want things to happen NOW? Things never do, and maybe you are right, perhaps that's life. It just sucks.
    Nah, life neither sucks nor delivers- it just is.

    If you want things to move on and want change in your life, that's a good sign you might soon be ready to muster the energy and strength for the next step.

    Are you familiar with the concept of Locus of control - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia ?
    The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge. Neither love without knowledge, nor knowledge without love can produce a good life. - Bertrand Russell
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    Quote Originally Posted by Noll View Post
    I know, there is nothing anyone can do, let alone over the internet. Shyness fades away over time or it sticks with you for the rest of your life, nonetheless it's a self-process. I just want the world to know, you know? To at least once be spoken about in favor, to have someone show some sort of sympathy and understanding, even if it is the internet. Now I know shyness doesn't improve for everyone, I know of people who are 40+ and are still virgin with a complete lack of a social life due to their immense shyness. Perhaps it is unconstructive, not as it hinders the cure for my potentially incurable shyness, rather that it distracts me from doing the things I am actually good at. Because surely, no one is bad at everything.
    Understandable, as sympathy is nice, and I'm sure that if you're shy, then communication in general is much easier online.

    Shyness is rarely incurable, so I doubt that yours is incurable -- even if it feels like it may be.

    Quote Originally Posted by Noll View Post
    Really? That just makes me feel worse, it makes me feel like all my problems are doomed to be forever since I will be the same type forever.
    Well, that depends on the problem, and depends on your outlook.

    1) Sometimes your problems are actually necessary counterbalances to your strengths. You can minimize them, and often SHOULD minimize them, but if you were to completely remove that problem, then your corresponding strength(s) would be gone.
    2) A good follow-up question to "are other people going through this problem?" ends up being "what have those people done to deal with the problem?" So, knowing you're not alone can give you a whole slew of good resources. As a typological example, note all the threads by particular types, asking how others of the same type deal with X. Oftentimes others are farther along in the growth process, and provide tips.

    The second point definitely applies to shyness, as plenty of others have been painfully shy and have overcome it. But it doesn't apply to typology.

    Quote Originally Posted by Noll View Post
    Social 4 is described as being extremely shy, they are described as not knowing how to be part of the social world. Now I know that maybe I can improve, but if it's set in stone like this then I am doomed. It's ideal not to delve too much into typology to be honest, it's a waste of time, but wasting time is what I am great at.
    I can think of some social 4s who aren't painfully shy. (@southern kross, for example.) Anyway, if you think typology means particular personality traits are set in stone and can never change, then it's no wonder you think typology is a waste of time!

    Quote Originally Posted by Noll View Post
    No, you should be given an award for at least pretending to care for a very short while. It is so rare it seems.
    I do care. I just show it without a ton of emoting. (I used to fake some Fe to combat that, but the Fe-faking process ended up feeling just that -- fake -- so I gave up.)
    and it's nice enough to
    make a man
    weep, but I don't
    weep, do
    you?

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    i don't know if i should take a shower here or at my other place. or what i should bring. or what clothes i should wear.

    so i'm doing nothing and will probably be rushing later. i hate being this way sometimes.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Noll View Post
    Guess I just hate myself, and nothing in the whole world amounts to my shyness.
    FireShield's does. In contrast to him, though, you seem to possess a good amount of common sense. Try to find an activity that forces you to do something - but not too much - with other people on a regular basis. You are empathetic and caring. Why not help at a retirement home?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    FireShield's does. In contrast to him, though, you seem to possess a good amount of common sense. Try to find an activity that forces you to do something - but not too much - with other people on a regular basis. You are empathetic and caring. Why not help at a retirement home?
    I'd rather not do anything like that outside of school due to the long days I have, I just had my first day of school today. On Mondays I quit at 5 pm, on Wednesdays 6 pm and Fridays 5 pm again. This may be nothing compared to how long some people work, but I know it will wear me out, that plus the homework, though I never do my homework, but still... It's a new class, maybe I'll get to know new people, I did talk to two new people, albeit extremely awkwardly and everyone seemed so much more comfortable than me. As it's a music class, perhaps the forced group activity will bring me closer to at least someone eventually. All I can do as of now is wait, honestly I'm just feeling irrationally whiny today.

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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    you're 17 or 18 you don't need to have your act together yet.
    heyyyyyyyyyyyyy, i'm a teenager too....... wow so much in common......


    i'm trying to be funny


    this is a joke


    ok
    "I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying."
    -Oscar Wilde

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    Quote Originally Posted by Red Herring View Post
    Are you familiar with the concept of Locus of control - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia ?
    No, but it seems interesting. I suppose my locus of control is very low, that is the problem with me. I am a very passive person, I believe mostly just in destiny, but yes, it is wrongful.

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