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Thread: Random Thought Thread

  1. #39141
    Senior Member Array captain curmudgeon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AphroditeGoneAwry View Post
    Oh, just what I said. It's pretty simple really. When you don't bond properly with the same sex parent, for whatever reason, you have this unfulfilled need in you that you desire to have filled by the gender parent that is 'missing'. Since we don't live in extended families anymore, those needs can't be met by an aunt or uncle or grandparent, and are rarely met by a family friend. Such is the way of the nuclear family; if it ain't healthy, the child/young adult yearns for that with someone else. In our society that is most easily obtained in a bf or gf. Hence, the person notices they are attracted to the same sex person and then labels themselves as 'gay'.

    So being attracted in a sexualoving way to someone of the same sex means you are seeking some unfulfilled need in your youth because that parent was unable to meet that need. You could just have a mentor or close relative fill that gap, but again, the nuclear family has sort of done away with that.

    Also, wanting to sex someone of the same sex, just means you want to sex. Anyone can sex anyone. It really says nothing about love or who your ideal mate will be.
    So you're saying that people raised in stable homes with solid and fulfilling mother and father figures do not turn out to be gay?
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  2. #39142
    failure to thrive Array AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wheelchairdoug View Post
    So you're saying that people raised in stable homes with solid and fulfilling mother and father figures do not turn out to be gay?
    Yes. I'm saying that does not happen.

    Unless they choose to be gay for mere sexual reasons. like orgies or swinging or such.
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  3. #39143
    ndovjtjcaqidthi
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    Quote Originally Posted by AphroditeGoneAwry View Post
    Yes. I'm saying that does not happen.

    Unless they choose to be gay for mere sexual reasons. like orgies or swinging or such.

  4. #39144
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    Quote Originally Posted by AphroditeGoneAwry View Post
    Yes. I'm saying that does not happen.

    Unless they choose to be gay for mere sexual reasons. like orgies or swinging or such.
    So how do you explain both the fact that there are gay people out there with incredibly supportive and nurturing nuclear families? Also, if being gay were a choice, why would people choose to be so, knowing that they will probably be ostracized, victimized, and or discriminated against in various ways?
    Jarlaxle: fact checking this thread makes me want to go all INFP on my wrists

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  5. #39145
    Post Human Post Array Qlip's Avatar
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    Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes, lá vem meu trêm...

  6. #39146
    failure to thrive Array AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wheelchairdoug View Post
    So how do you explain both the fact that there are gay people out there with incredibly supportive and nurturing nuclear families?
    It takes delving deeper to see the truth. It doesn't take a 'bad' family to make one gay, but it takes something that prohibits the proper bonding at any stage of the developmental cycle. It could be a dad that works at a distance and is not around much. It could be a workaholic dad that is gone a lot for the first part of his child's life, then stays home the second part of his child's life. My point is, it's not always apparent to outsiders that the family isn't ideal. And it is usually not apparent to the family either, unless you question the youth or young adult having gay feelings. Otherwise, all the people I've known who have lived a gay lifestyle definitely have some dysfunction in some way in which I am referring.

    Also, if being gay were a choice, why would people choose to be so, knowing that they will probably be ostracized, victimized, and or discriminated against in various ways?
    Because they are seeking to fulfill a deep need, whose origin they can not begin to understand without much delving and discussion and consciousness. The choice for them then seems to become either living without this deep psychological need being met, or living with those other things. Which would you prefer? Anyone who has grown up with severe lack in their primary relationships, or who has known an absence of need in some way, knows that those other things pale in comparison to getting that need fulfilled. It is a driving force that stems from a very real emotion and need. It's just that even when that need seems to be met by having a relationship with a person of the same gender (which is a reenactment of the primary relationship, a do-over, if you will), it will inevitably result in dissatisfaction, just as pursuing any relationship out of lack results in dissatisfaction. Because the original need can only be met by the parent, or healed by God with consciousness and therapeutic discourse.
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  7. #39147
    Member Array zulidadwi's Avatar
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    [QUOTE]
    Quote Originally Posted by AphroditeGoneAwry View Post
    It takes delving deeper to see the truth. It doesn't take a 'bad' family to make one gay, but it takes something that prohibits the proper bonding at any stage of the developmental cycle. It could be a dad that works at a distance and is not around much. It could be a workaholic dad that is gone a lot for the first part of his child's life, then stays home the second part of his child's life. My point is, it's not always apparent to outsiders that the family isn't ideal. And it is usually not apparent to the family either, unless you question the youth or young adult having gay feelings. Otherwise, all the people I've known who have lived a gay lifestyle definitely have some dysfunction in some way in which I am referring.


    Because they are seeking to fulfill a deep need, whose origin they can not begin to understand without much delving and discussion and consciousness. The choice for them then seems to become either living without this deep psychological need being met, or living with those other things. Which would you prefer? Anyone who has grown up with severe lack in their primary relationships, or who has known an absence of need in some way, knows that those other things pale in comparison to getting that need fulfilled. It is a driving force that stems from a very real emotion and need. It's just that even when that need seems to be met by having a relationship with a person of the same gender (which is a reenactment of the primary relationship, a do-over, if you will), it will inevitably result in dissatisfaction, just as pursuing any relationship out of lack results in dissatisfaction. Because the original need can only be met by the parent, or healed by God with consciousness and therapeutic discourse.
    So you're saying that gay people has a lack of something that comes from their family. I assume to become gay *maybe* because there's a somewhat dysfunction in their family and can't fulfilled their need about something. And reasonably they finally decide to become gay. That be like from unconciouss make your emotion and influence your reasons and finally in result gay behavior.

    I made conclusion that maybe being a gay wasn't a choice.

    It's become a contradiction with being gay was a choice. But if being gay was a choice ? shouldn't there are also gay people whose come from healthy and fulfill family

  8. #39148
    failure to thrive Array AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=zulidadwi;2193931]





    So you're saying that gay people has a lack of something that comes from their family. I assume to become gay *maybe* because there's a somewhat dysfunction in their family and can't fulfilled their need about something. And reasonably they finally decide to become gay. That be like from unconciouss make your emotion and influence your reasons and finally in result gay behavior.

    I made conclusion that maybe being a gay wasn't a choice.

    It's become a contradiction with being gay was a choice. But if being gay was a choice ? shouldn't there are also gay people whose come from healthy and fulfill family

    Being gay is a choice when the person chooses to live a gay lifestyle. Not that having those feelings or indicators is a choice, but the carrying out of the action of being gay.

    Of course, people have a right to live how they like as long as they don't hurt others. I'm just talking about God's divine will and His Law here. And the psychology behind being 'gay'.
    Ni/Ti/Fe/Si
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    Do not resist an evil person, but to him who strikes you on the one cheek, offer also the other. ~Matthew 5:39

    songofmary.wordpress.com


  9. #39149
    figsfiggyfigs
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  10. #39150
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