I have received spam e-mails about my non-existent Facebook and Twitter accounts being 'updated', but never my non-existent criminal record.
Apparently I can also get 80% off the price of Viagra and Cialis by buying online from a company that imports pharmaceuticals from—wait for it—Canada.
And I can get a deal on fake Rolexes. I don't mean to say "fake Rolexes" facetiously: the spam e-mail's subject field really did say they were fake. These scammers aren't even trying anymore. Remember the good ol' days when some huckster in a trench coat would sell his wares on the streets? "Genuine," they'd say, "absolutely genuine!" Bought from a wholesaler perhaps, or bequeathed to them by their great-uncle, a collector of fine watches.