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  1. #1
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    Default Funny & Inappropriate Stories of Friends and Accidents

    I'm about to go to bed and just thought of this and it cracked me up. I have also never posted to 'fluff' because I'm above these things you see. So why not amuse myself and see if others have similar stories.

    You know when people get hurt and ostensibly it's not funny...but it is?

    Yeah, I just wanted to create a thread so people could share.

    My contribution:

    1) My friend was biking to work 15 minutes away when she hit a gutter and fell face first into the pavement. The right side of her cheek was scraped up and bleeding and she had cuts over her face. It looked like the sidewalk kicked her ass. It was such a dramatic looking fall that 1 car stopped (and in our city, that's a lot!) She went to work anyways and walked into her bosses office to ask for a half day hospital visit. As soon as she walked in, he gave her a once over and said, "You look like shit".

    Hahhaha. I think that's funny. And she works at a research center so her boss is probably a T. Just a wild guess.

    2) My friend used to work at a recreational center for developmentally challenged kids. They were playing a rousing game of indoor softball and as she was rounding a base, she had a freak fall. Somehow, she ended up snapping her ankle bones in a few places and was paralyzed with pain, sobbing quietly on the gym floor. "What did the kids do? Did they freak out?" I asked her. She said matter of factly, "They yelled at me for holding up the game and ran around me."

    Now THAT is funny. Funny but wrong. I was ROFLMAO when I first heard that. It's not as funny now. But still funny. So I share with you.

    So, please, don't let me be some crazy internet lady posting message by myself to lonely threads out here and getting kicked to the curb that is 'graveyard'.

    Contribute.

    Please?

    Thanks.

  2. #2
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    I can't help but to laugh at accidents, like when one friend got hit over the head by another friend with a tennis raquet while playing tennis- she looked so surprized that I couldn't help but to laugh! Or when people walk straight into the large glass window in the front of my store And the time when 2 drunk guys were riding a bicycle together home from the bars and wrecked into the curb right in front of me!

    just reflecting on that makes me smile! (plus- I know that I do unfortunate things all of the time that other people can laugh at, so it all balances out!)

  3. #3
    Senior Member Lookin4theBestNU's Avatar
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    OK no one was hurt badly but here are some of my favorites.

    I'm clumsy all the time and get laughed at often. I'd never saw my husband be clumsy ever...but the one time he was he went all out!! We were all jumping off these high bridges into a pond. He said he didn't want to do it but I somehow ended coaxing him. Anyway he got on the platform and I could tell from the second he jumped things were not going to end well . It was one of those where you start wincing right away. The fall seemed liked it lasted a long time.

    I swear he did the biggest and loudest "backbuster" I had ever seen. It was so freaking hilarious but I had to hold it in . His back looked pinkish purple and he was so PISSED. I don't remember ever having to be as quiet as I did that day!!


    My ISTJ best friend has given me some of my better laughs. I could always tell when a really hot guy was in the store because she couldn't speak properly. Knowing this about herself and the true joy it caused me watching her squirm she always tried to 'keep her cool'. She as a general rule always over corrected which ended up being even funnier!

    One day I made a ditch away from ringing up this guy who was totally sexy so that she would have to do it. I instead went to the other side of the store to watch. She went into 'robot-mode', very mechanical and it would have been OK. The guy screwed it up though by making some almost flirtatious little joke with her. Anyway it caught her off guard and she was laughing so nervously that she FELL straight into the trash can with a loud ruckus knocking the top off! There was no way for her to graciously recover. She was also PISSED at me and asked me if I had done it intentionally. I told her there was no way I could intentionally plan something so awesome!!
    "At points of clarity, I realize that my life on earth is meaningless, and that I am merely a pawn in a bigger game. A game I cannot possibly understand or have control of. Thankfully, before depression sets in, I drift back into my cloudy, bewildered daily routine." **Joel Patrick Warneke**

  4. #4
    Oberon
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    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Contribute.

  5. #5
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by oberon View Post
    Never ask the ENTP a topic like this, unless you want to be here all day.

    (I know you're holding back.)
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  6. #6
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    I once gave myself a pretty deep cut in a finger from a kitchen knife, while I was cutting the knife slipped pretty hard into the finger, I think it sliced pretty far below the skin, enough that the finger was numbed enough that I went a bit giddy, my mom was also getting quite worried when she saw the cut.

    I got this cut by trying to cut off one of those rings that holds the plastic cap on orange juice or milk bottles. the bottle was opened, but I have a dislike of leaving the plastic ring on, and I couldn't find a smaller knife to do it with.

  7. #7
    Oberon
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    Never ask the ENTP a topic like this, unless you want to be here all day.

    (I know you're holding back.)
    Strangely, this ENTP feels empathy for the injured people in the ENFP's gleeful stories.

    Must be a blue moon or something.

  8. #8
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    When I was in school overseas, I was walking through the venerable halls of the Academy with my girls during lunch. The upperclassmen had taken complete control of the cafeteria. There were three very flat yet treacherous steps outside this room, and they claimed another victim. Me. I still can't accurately describe the gymnastics involved, but I wound up skidding to a halt on my back centered dead to rights in the middle of the doorway. The upperclassmen, all five million of them, turned, hooted, cheered, applauded loudly when I got up and took several bows, waved to the room.

    Yeah. Wanted to die. LOL My not-as-yet boyfriend was in there too, a rugby player that had been eyeballing me since the day I arrived. I could see him in there, turning red and laughing, but he was the first out of his seat clapping when I got up. lol Smart aleck.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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  9. #9
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    Very funny. It shows that you like a no-nonsense approach to humor and don't like being coddled.

    Me- I turn into a baby when I have to endure the slightest bit of physical pain.

  10. #10
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    I don't know how I forgot this unfortunate story!

    I was at a party at my old house and had had a couple of drinks and decided to head down to the basement to see what was going on- I was still relatively sober. The girl in front of me slipped on a drink someone had spilled on the stairs and fell on them, so I went to ask her if she was ok and in the process slipped on her drink and completely smashed my elbow! I had to laugh even though my elbow fucking HURT (I bruised a bone and got a deep gash)- really- who slips on a drink right after seeing someone else do it?!

    (and this is why I can laugh at other people's misfortunes- I laugh at my own as well!

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