Here are some excerpts from I thread with the same name at INTPc. I thought it would be fun to start something similar here as well (i.e. steal their idea). I had to read a bunch of crapy ones to get this list...so you can thank me by posting good follow up zingers.
"I feel safer with Milla sleeping in the room, I think that if anything spiritual were to happen she would bark."
"I'm allowed to contradict myself because I'm an anarchist, and anarchists don't have rules."
"Why are we putting so much money into space travel research? we should be using it for research to live underwater, because of global warming."
"why would you vote for him? he's a muslim you know, this is a christian nation'
Do you want your taxes funding a pointless war that's ravaging our economy and political relations?
"No, but I heard Obama wants to build these muslim fountains in every airport, and I don't want to pay for that."
"Unless you want bin laden to come in you're gonna to carry your passport like everybody else'
-us customs official
"It's like the smiths, was like a what, a brit pop band or ah they were a rock band.. they could be an emo band, you know; all they ever sing about is girls."
"see, the story of how cinco de mayo came to be a holiday is basically the mexicans and the french got into a war and the french won their independence, but they were nice and gave it to the mexicans
i should know this because my family is french"
conversation among dude 1 and dude 2, verbatim:
"hey, you think you could get in trouble for fixing the olympics?"
"yeah of course man, why would you want to fix the olympics anyways?"
"I don't know, I'd just say fuck it and say moscow wins everything"
"haha you're all dumb dude moscow is like an area of russia"
"Someone told me that Russia invaded Georgia. I live outside of Atlanta, but I haven't heard of anything going on, or us attacking some group of minorities"
"scorpions are pussies, a mantis would fuck them up.
remember when I had a mantis?"
did you make it fight a scorpion?
"no, but I already knew it was a mantis."
"I don't get all this x and y algebra stuff, why don't they call them 1 and 2 instead?"
"I don't believe in God, but I do believe in angels. Like gabriel and michael."
But why would those christian angels exist without god?
"It's annoying how if you're nearly eighteen, you can't do stuff. I say, from three months before you turn 18 you should be able to do the things 18 year olds can."
What if you're three months and one day before 18?
"Then you can't do it."
In 9th grade history class, we learned how Trotsky was killed in Mexico with an icepick.
blonde girl - "Wouldn't it melt?"
Me: I had this disease when I was a kid, a potentially fatal disease
Dude: Did you die?
16 year old:
You always take me for granted like I'm gonna be here forever, and you know what Ernie I am always going to be here but...
You ruined my life! You ruined my fucking life!
" I might not know nothin about nothin. But what i do know is thats wrrooong." (I kinda like this last one)
Ok this should give you some ideas now keep your ears pealed for some stupid shit....and then post....after...that....under this post...that you are reading...now