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  1. #1
    cast shadows metaphours's Avatar
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    Default Worst pick up lines?

    List your favorite worst pick up lines you've heard. The funniest I've heard are:

    "Hey! Are you from Tennessee? 'Cause you're the only ten I see. Oh."

    "Wanna fight the Battle of my Bulge?"

    "Whew! Good thing I brought my library card, cause I'm checkin' you out."

    List yours, errbodeh.

  2. #2
    WTF is this dude saying? A Schnitzel's Avatar
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    Trinity has a few in her blog.
    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    sheesh humans! for realz

  3. #3
    cast shadows metaphours's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by A Schnitzel View Post
    Trinity has a few in her blog.
    Too bad. I asked people to list their favorites, not Trinity's.

  4. #4
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    "do you have change for a dollar?"
    "no..."
    "too bad. i wanted a quarter to put in your love machine."

    ^ not the funniest, but was actually used on a friend of mine
    "Develop interest in life as you see it...the world is so rich, simply throbbing with rich treasures, beautiful souls and interesting people. Forget yourself." -- H. Miller
    -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
    Johari the good..
    Nohari.. the bad, and the ugly

    I'm a FiNe SiTe to see!

  5. #5
    cast shadows metaphours's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by demimondaine View Post
    "do you have change for a dollar?"
    "no..."
    "too bad. i wanted a quarter to put in your love machine."
    ROFL MY WOFL

  6. #6
    Senior Member TSDesigner's Avatar
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    My love for you is like diarrhea, because I just can't keep it inside.

    If I told you that you have a nice body, would you hold it against me?

    I feel good. Want to feel me?

  7. #7
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
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    Weird Al wrote a song that is perfect for this thread. It contains some of the lines that have already been mentioned:

    "Wanna B Ur Lovr"

    I don't have a library card
    But do you mind if I check you out?
    I like your skeletal structure, baby
    You're an ectomorph, no doubt

    Your face is real symmetrical
    And your nostils are so nice
    I wish that I was cross-eyed, girl
    So I could see you twice

    Girl, you smell like Fritos
    That's why I'm giving you this hungry stare
    You're so hot, you're gonna melt
    The elastic in my underwear

    I'll bet you're magically delicious
    Like a bowl of Lucky Charms
    You'd look like Venus de Milo
    If I just cut off your arms
    What I'm tryin' to say is ...

    I wanna be your lover, baby
    I need somebody to love
    You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
    Now, I need somebody to love

    Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo
    Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo
    Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo
    Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

    Do you believe in love at first sight
    Or should I walk by again?
    My love for you'd like diarrhea
    I just can't hold it in

    Stop, drop and roll now
    'Cause baby, you're on fire
    I'll bet your outfit
    Makes a lot of noise in the drier

    You're absolutely perfect
    Don't speak now, you might spoil it
    Your eyes are even bluer
    Than the water in my toilet

    Say, has anyone ever told you
    You've got Yugoslavian hands?
    No, of course not, that would be stupid
    Just forget I ever brought it up
    The point I'm trying to make is ...

    I wanna be your lover, baby
    I need somebody to love
    You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
    Now, I need somebody to love

    Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo
    Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo
    Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo
    Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

    I wanna be your Krakatoa
    Let my lava flow all over you
    I wanna be your anaconda
    And your heat-seeking missile too

    I wanna be your beef burrito
    Am I making this perfectly clear?
    I wanna be your love torpedo
    Are you picking up the subtle innuendo here?
    Uh huh

    I hope I'm not being forward
    But do you mind if I chew on your butt?
    You can tell me truthfully
    Am I a steamin' hunk of love now, or what?

    There just aren't enough o's in "smooth"
    To desribe how smooth I am
    Maybe you've seen my picture
    It's in the dictionary under "Kablaam!"

    My lips are registered weapons
    Can I invade your personal space?
    You must have fallen from heaven
    That would explain how you messed up your face

    Well, how'd you get through security?
    'Cause, baby, you're the bomb
    I'd like to take you home right now
    So you can meet my mom
    Because I ...

    I wanna be your lover, baby
    I need somebody to love
    You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
    Now, I need somebody to love

    Girl, you must be Jamaican
    Because Jamaican me crazy
    Girl, you must be Jamaican (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
    Because Jamaican me crazy (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)

    I wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
    I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)
    You know I just wanna be your lover, baby (Girl, you must be Jamaican) (Ooh hoo hoo, ooh hoo hoo)
    Now, I need somebody to love (Because Jamaican me crazy) (Ooh hoo hoo, hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)

    [repeats until the end]
    Go to sleep, iguana.


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  8. #8
    Senior Member JivinJeffJones's Avatar
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    YouTube - Kevin Bloody Wilson-Do ya fuck on 1st dates

    Beloved of truckies, miners, shearers and station-hands the whole country over. I thought he was hilarious when I was 8.

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