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Thread: Avoiding people in public places

  1. #31
    Timeless Legend Array Xann's Avatar
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    Mar 2010


  2. #32
    Tempbanned Array
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    May 2014
    EIE Ni


    Eh, I generally don't actively avoid people in public but I live in my own world, and it is so much more pleasurable if I can explore that universe without interruption. I kind of have a vague image of me skulking around a museum or art gallery in corners, avoiding the busy places so I can take stuff in without feeling overwhelmed, and violated by strangers.

    That being said, I much prefer to live with someone else than alone, and can get very lonely at night because I remember too vividly the feeling of someone snuggling up to me. Of course I do like to meet new people and socialise in groups from time to time. But it is just a transient need, and easily satiated. In the end it's just a matter of time before I have to withdraw back into my own weird emotional world.

  3. #33
    Senior Member Array
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    Jun 2015
    9w1 sp/sx
    ISFp Fi


    I don't mind being approached in the open public if I am spending my time leisurely, but when I am performing some sort of errand or task I tend to completely dissociate and prefer to remain alone without disruption, which is one of the reasons school and the idea of working with others gives me cancer. If am trying to think through something I completely dismiss what you're saying and end up lost and confused... which happens all the time cause it's just the natural state I return to, and I have a difficult time controlling it.

  4. #34
    Seal Down Array Hard's Avatar
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    Jan 2014
    1w2 sp/so
    SLE Se


    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    I agree with Substitute. I don't try to avoid people, but when I don't want to chitchat, I try to send out very clear signals that I don't want to talk or I engage in a few words and make an exit. I too try not to overstay my welcome and look for signals that a person is ready to go about their merry way.

    It's happened that when I see someone I know and they see me, I've noticed them avert their eyes really quick. Cool, you don't want to talk, NO PROBLEM. Just don't pretend like you don't know me, say hello and keep going. That's when I start to wonder if something is wrong and I speed off into infinity with thoughts of why they did that.
    ^Yep that's basically what I do. Yup.
    MBTI: ExxJ tetramer
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    Enneagram: 1w2 - 3w4 - 6w5 (The Taskmaster) | sp/so
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  5. #35
    Sin is Sincere. Array florpoetis's Avatar
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    Jan 2016
    4w3 so/sx


    Quote Originally Posted by DarkMagician View Post
    I tend to completely dissociate and prefer to remain alone without disruption,bIf am trying to think through something I completely dismiss what you're saying and end up lost and confused... which happens all the time cause it's just the natural state I return to, and I have a difficult time controlling it.
    Me, all the time. Saying "huh?" after someone says something to me has become a habit because of this. I dissociate so much that half the time I have to ask two or three questions before I grasp what someone is telling me. At work this happens and I know it annoys some of my co-workers, lol. My inner world takes over everything and my brain has to "switch" to listen and concentrate on another person's voice.
    I try to avoid people in public, both strangers and those I know. Only exception is if I feel REALLY comfortable with you and then I don't care and will probably go out of my way to talk to you. I'm polite and social when I need to be but avoidant is my default.
    Last edited by florpoetis; 01-20-2016 at 12:44 PM.
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  6. #36
    Senior Member Array Hitoshi-San's Avatar
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    Jun 2014
    6w7 sp/sx


    HA, it doesn't even matter who this person happens to be - if they didn't see me, they won't have to. Like, I feel dizzy whenever this happens. My mom used to give me grief about it as a kid, but I would just say, "huh, I didn't know". If they do see me, it's not like I can just run away, so I might as well just make conversation with them because they're obviously probably not sure what to do in such a situation either and I would feel a bit confused and rejected if someone just....looked at me and walked off.

  7. #37
    Senior Member Array Dyslexxie's Avatar
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    Sep 2015
    378 sx/sp


    I'm incredibly extroverted if I want to be, but if I'm on a mission (generally when I'm out and about I'm trying to get somewhere), I try to avoid people. I'll play dumb and pretend I don't see them, and if they approach me, I get really annoyed and try to leave as fast as possible. I don't really have issues with telling people I have other things to focus on. I'd rather do that than waste time when I don't have any to waste.
    "Ours is essentially a tragic age, so we refuse to take it tragically. The cataclysm has happened, we are among the ruins, we start to build up new little habitats, to have new little hopes. It is rather hard work: there is now no smooth road into the future: but we go round, or scramble over the obstacles. We’ve got to live, no matter how many skies have fallen."
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  8. #38


    Oh I definitely actively avoid people. On campus, I know a few great spots to hide in between classes where other people never go. I go out of my way and take the longer route to get to class so no one will talk to me. I absolutely hate it when people recognize me and stop me to say hi, because then I have to engage in painfully awkward polite small talk when I could be doing something much funner, like Anything Else such as Going Home. One of the worst social experiences of my college life was when someone I didn't know sat next to me at a table and started talking to me while I was trying to eat lunch because they saw me alone and assumed I was lonely. No!!!! I like being alone!!! I want to be alone literally always. I suffered through it politely (though inwardly annoyed) at the time, but you can definitely be sure I never ate my lunch anywhere near that area of campus again... I went and found my hidey spots. I'm actually in one of them right now on my phone as I write this lol. If I'm forced to leave my house, I'll go to wherever I need to go and then go home without ever speaking a single word most days. That's the way I prefer it.
    but not like this, it won't be by your hand
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  9. #39
    I am Array Fay's Avatar
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    Jun 2013
    4w3 so/sx
    IEI Ni


    When I meet someone in public I usually feel uncomfortable to be the first one to say "Hi", probably just because it would be awkward if the person just didn't response back. So if you won't say hi to me, there's about 100% chance I won't even look at you. Another think is, that I generally avoid eye contact so looking at me is kinda difficult one way or another. Then about most of the time I have my earphones and I listen to music when I am somewhere out, so if you say hi, I wouldn't probably even hear you... I don't know, approaching people is hard and avoiding just costs me less anxiety and less issues so I generally pick the avoiding technic.
    4w3-5w4-9w8 so/sx
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  10. #40
    Hate F u c k Array Masokissed's Avatar
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    Apr 2015
    7w8 sx/so
    SEE Se


    I used to but now I usually like bumping into people. Because if I'm just with my mom it makes it less boring (until she asks who it was or if I actually said hi to them when she doesn't pay much attention) and if I'm already with friends then we have more people to add.

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