The song is in czech, but perfectly describes the past 3 years of my life.
....For everyone who knows me more than I know myself
for everyone, that I love...
and that's why I like to open the last bottle
and smoke my last cigarette
we who have lost the ideals about world
it's the last solution we have
and that's why I like dying so much everytime
dying again and again
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before. E. A. Poe