User Tag List

First 1234 Last

Results 11 to 20 of 82

Thread: Diamond Rings

  1. #11
    Senior Member darlets's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    357

    Default

    I think it would be more symbolic to get her a chunk of coal.
    "The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time."
    Bertrand Russell

    http://rayofsolar.blogspot.com/
    http://zeropointseven.blogspot.com/

  2. #12
    shoshaku jushaku rivercrow's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    type
    Posts
    1,555

    Default

    Oh, come on. It's diamonds!


    Honestly -- I refused to wear diamonds for years.

    Something happened around year 7 of marriage. I wanted diamonds. Hm.... I think I turned 30, too.

    So for our 10 year anniversary, I got DeBeers pave square diamonds in a channel-cut platinum ring.

    It really meant a lot at 10 years, and it means alot now.

    At year 5 I got a 15 carat diamond, but that doesn't count since I can't wear it.
    Who rises in the morning, looks in the mirror and says, "I think I will do something stupid today?" -- James Hollis
    If people never did silly things nothing intelligent would ever get done. -- Ludwig Wittgenstein
    Whaling is illegal in Oklahoma.

  3. #13
    Senior Member darlets's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    357

    Default

    I just think if you want a diamond you should create it from a lump of coal yourself or mine it yourself. You'll appreciate them alot more that way.
    "The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time."
    Bertrand Russell

    http://rayofsolar.blogspot.com/
    http://zeropointseven.blogspot.com/

  4. #14
    shoshaku jushaku rivercrow's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    type
    Posts
    1,555

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by darlets View Post
    I just think if you want a diamond you should create it from a lump of coal yourself or mine it yourself. You'll appreciate them alot more that way.
    Where do you think the 15-carat diamond came from?
    Who rises in the morning, looks in the mirror and says, "I think I will do something stupid today?" -- James Hollis
    If people never did silly things nothing intelligent would ever get done. -- Ludwig Wittgenstein
    Whaling is illegal in Oklahoma.

  5. #15
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    9w1
    Socionics
    INFj None
    Posts
    9,827

    Default

    At fifteen years I just took his money and picked out rings for the both of us. Mine has tiny little lame diamonds, but it is adequate. Someday, if our financial situation improves, I might get something better. For myself. With his money.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  6. #16
    Senior Member ptgatsby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    ISTP
    Posts
    4,474

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by alex View Post
    Then I wanted a diamond, not because it's a status beacon, but because it was symbolic of a durable, lasting relationship.
    Not a judgment of how you feel - if I felt the way you did, I'd buy it without blinking - but I am curious if you know what prompted that feeling that diamonds were symbolic of this after that period of time.

    Quote Originally Posted by toonia View Post
    They compete with each other over material things their men buy for them - or so i've heard.
    That's the only reason I've really understood so far... and from my friends/family getting married, it seem to be all about that.

    Quote Originally Posted by athenian200 View Post
    Well, it sounds to me like this is very important to you, and I don't think you should compromise your values.
    Oh, I won't. At worst, we would of traded over what she and I wanted. We haven't had to compromise significantly in our relationship so far... this wasn't an exception;

    I should of been clear - we had already discussed this and she is happy with the outcome. It helps that she doesn't see it as me being cheap - we already share our finances and have a budget for our wedding (this is about 1.5 years in advance, before we are engaged... Yes, I plan like this). As a result, the loss of money would be hers as well and would come out of the wedding budget. I felt this was important for her to understand - when we are married... well, long before we are "signed"... that a cost on me was a cost on her - and vice versa. So, when push comes to shove, she herself couldn't justify the ring.

    FWIW, this is the reversal of the strategy that made men buy the diamond ring in secret in the first place - women before the marketing campaign were interviewed and said en masse that they would prefer having that money put towards a downpayment/etc. The marketing campaign therefore engineered the "surprise" her bit so that they wouldn't talk about the cost of the ring.

    Her family probably will care, however. And there are friends that will influence it. I do, however, feel strongly about this and I explained the situation to her and showed her what we could do instead - the money will be spent either way, it is a matter of how we spend it. When it was put that way... well, it became a non-issue. Had she insisted, I would have obliged regardless... and had a small wedding.

    Mostly, I'm curious about why it continues to be a 'tradition'... why the diamond and not the house... or the car... or the furniture. Why not something practical. Why the diamond?

    As far as a ring itself, I would say that it makes the ceremony go more smoothly because it is the traditional symbol of a bond. The Diamond thing isn't as big or important a tradition as the ring itself. Many people can't afford Diamonds, and still get married. Also, some people actually prefer Sapphires, Rubies, Emeralds, Onyx, and various other precious stones.
    Yup, I respected that. Rings have long represented something and while I wear no jewelry at all - not even a watch - I wasn't going to fight back on wearing a wedding ring. Though she might have accepted me carrying the One Ring around my neck. I thought "and in the darkness..." would be suitable for us.

  7. #17
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    9w1
    Socionics
    INFj None
    Posts
    9,827

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ptgatsby View Post
    Yup, I respected that. Rings have long represented something and while I wear no jewelry at all - not even a watch - I wasn't going to fight back on wearing a wedding ring. Though she might have accepted me carrying the One Ring around my neck. I thought "and in the darkness..." would be suitable for us.
    My daughter says that when she gets married she wants the One Ring as a wedding band. Truth be told she wants the One Ring right now, but she knows her dad and I are unlikely to spring for it.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  8. #18
    shoshaku jushaku rivercrow's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    type
    Posts
    1,555

    Default

    So ... basically you were sandbagging again.

    That reminds me. I should restart the "sandbagging as a bannable offense" campaign.
    Who rises in the morning, looks in the mirror and says, "I think I will do something stupid today?" -- James Hollis
    If people never did silly things nothing intelligent would ever get done. -- Ludwig Wittgenstein
    Whaling is illegal in Oklahoma.

  9. #19
    Senior Member ptgatsby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    ISTP
    Posts
    4,474

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by darlets View Post
    I just think if you want a diamond you should create it from a lump of coal yourself or mine it yourself. You'll appreciate them alot more that way.
    I had to decide between making it myself and having the custom ring done. In the end, I chose to go with having it custom done so that we can have matching pieces rather than my amateur approach.

    (But it was something I was considering with gold, actually.)

    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    At fifteen years I just took his money and picked out rings for the both of us. Mine has tiny little lame diamonds, but it is adequate. Someday, if our financial situation improves, I might get something better. For myself. With his money.
    Is it really his money when you are married? If you wouldn't buy it for yourself with your money... is it any better than buying it with "his"? (Unless that was in jest Meaning that you would rather spend your guys money on that rather than a vacation/car/etc?)

  10. #20
    Senior Member ptgatsby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    ISTP
    Posts
    4,474

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by rivercrow View Post
    So ... basically you were sandbagging again.

    That reminds me. I should restart the "sandbagging as a bannable offense" campaign.
    I didn't want to derail from my curiousity (I did say it had been resolved from the start!)

    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    My daughter says that when she gets married she wants the One Ring as a wedding band. Truth be told she wants the One Ring right now, but she knows her dad and I are unlikely to spring for it.
    It's pretty cheap Relatively speaking...

Similar Threads

  1. Last person to post in this thread gets a diamond ring!
    By Samvega in forum The Fluff Zone
    Replies: 1051
    Last Post: 08-28-2009, 05:30 PM
  2. Replies: 22
    Last Post: 09-13-2008, 10:00 AM
  3. Did Gray's Work Ring a[n Alexander Graham] Bell?
    By Totenkindly in forum Politics, History, and Current Events
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 12-28-2007, 07:05 PM
  4. One ring to rule them all... blah blah blah (Not about LOTR)
    By Xander in forum Philosophy and Spirituality
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 05-18-2007, 05:29 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO