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Thread: Mom Quotes

  1. #81
    Row row row your boat Array SD45T-2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PocketFullOf View Post
    Please tell me this place is in Yolo county.
    Yolo county is popular?
    1w2-6w5-3w2 so/sp

    "I took one those personality tests. It came back negative." - Dan Mintz
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  2. #82
    climb on Array Showbread's Avatar
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    A recent Facebook status of mine. My mom's comment is the last one.
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*

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  3. #83

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    An exchange from last Feb via text:

    me: Hello, what is going on with Easter this year?
    mom: I will have it here. It's late this year. Have a lot of snow today? Sick of the stuff here.
    me: Not a flake here yet. OK, I don't have [daughter] this year but will probably be bringing my girlfriend to Easter.
    mom: All girlfriends welcome
    me: Well, I only have the one.
    mom: One at a time.

    Oof, mom. That wouldn't sting so much if the girlfriend had lasted to Easter.
    Bork bork bork.

  4. #84
    Senior Member Array prplchknz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PocketFullOf View Post
    Please tell me this place is in Yolo county.
    hah! no
    Perfectly robust chickens
    Run laps a lot
    Pee on the garden
    Leap over fences
    Cock is a word for rooster
    Hen is a type of chicken?
    Kit kats are good
    Nice chickens don't belong in the
    Zoo
    ~@magpie

  5. #85
    The Green Jolly Robin H. Array GarrotTheThief's Avatar
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    me: "I'm sorry momma!"
    mom: "but tonight I'm cleaning out my closet. I'm sorry momma!"
    me: too much. TOO MUCH!
    "i shut the door and in the morning
    it was open
    -the end"




    Olemn slammed his hammer and from the sparks on the metal of his anvil came the spheres of the heavens.

    Sayrah blew life into the spheres and they moved. From her wheel she weaved the names of people in to mystery.
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  6. #86
    Suave y Fuerte Array BadOctopus's Avatar
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    @Arcana, I told my mom about that butternut squash soup recipe. She bought a ton of butternut squash and she was worried they'd go bad before she could use them all, so I told her she could cut them up, blanch them, and then freeze them to use later.

    Mom: That's a really good idea.
    Me: I'm full of them.
    Mom: You're full of something, that's for sure.
    WOOP WOOP WOOP
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  7. #87
    Biche Array ESFJ's Avatar
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    Mom:I should sew your mouth shut.
    Me:Alas this would not prevent my eyes from judging you.
    Mom:Hmm...no breathing holes, it'll make it easier to put you to sleep.*holds nose*
    ----
    Mom:Get the paper.
    Me:I'm fine, but thank you for thinking of me.
    Mom:Shh!! Just go, please.
    Me:The lazy, I fear it comes for me next...it's taking my legs from me.
    Mom: Argh...I just don't want the neighbors to see me in my pajamas ok?
    Me...
    Me:Well, they are the very axis upon which our lives rotate. *Gets up*
    Mom:Thank you!
    Me:Remember me as I am this very moment when you're writing your will.
    Mom:You're getting all of my credit card debt!
    ---
    Mom:*Raps head* Don't be insensitive!
    ---
    Mom:I wonder who shoved the stick up your dad's butt today?
    Me:Today?
    Mom:You're right, he was born that way.
    "Fate and character are different names for the same idea.”

    +/
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  8. #88

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    My Mom: <long gossipy story> ...but I said 'I'm not getting involved.'

    Me: Riiiight.


    P.S. She always gets involved. (And yes, she's a dyed-in-the-wool ESFJ.)
    "There is no god; there is only us. Savage and fragile."

  9. #89
    came back haunted Array EJCC's Avatar
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    Mom (on the latest offensively sexist Barbie book):

    "Just to be clear: I blame this ALL on REPUBLICANS."


    (tone: about 60% tongue-in-cheek, and completely deadpan -- the sort of thing she would attach this smiley to if it was available)
    Quote Originally Posted by Nørrsken impersonating EJCC
    It's strange. I keep banning morons, but they keep signing up? What is this?
    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
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    want to ask me something? go for it!
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  10. #90
    Senior Member Array prplchknz's Avatar
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    my mom's response after mentioning a cake i want make to her: "yes we need to perfect this one. I must starve between now and Christmas break."
    Perfectly robust chickens
    Run laps a lot
    Pee on the garden
    Leap over fences
    Cock is a word for rooster
    Hen is a type of chicken?
    Kit kats are good
    Nice chickens don't belong in the
    Zoo
    ~@magpie
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