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Thread: Mom Quotes

  1. #91
    Senior Member senza tema's Avatar
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    "You're all a bunch of ingrates."

    "When I drop dead, you'll see."

    "WHY ARE PEOPLE SO BORING? ANSWER ME."
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  2. #92
    climb on Showbread's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Mom (on the latest offensively sexist Barbie book):

    "Just to be clear: I blame this ALL on REPUBLICANS."


    (tone: about 60% tongue-in-cheek, and completely deadpan -- the sort of thing she would attach this smiley to if it was available)
    I'm dying. This is way funnier because I am in the Computer Science lab with a bunch of computer engineers who are reading this and correcting all the terminology errors. Their conclusion "It's a book about all the reasons women men's help to use computers."
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*

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  3. #93
    Male johnnyyukon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Arcana View Post
    Lots of love. That's what my mom thought it meant. She was stunned by the real meaning and decided she didn't like it.
    Quote Originally Posted by 93JC View Post



    My mother still signs e-mails to me "LOL".
    So I just got of the phone with my sweet mother, and indeed, she thought "lots of love," which I had seen in funny mom texts. But apparently her generation has been using the acronym since the 80s. I didn't find much to back this up (not that I don't believe her) but if so, that would mean "lots of love" predates "laugh out loud."

    Haha, anyway, I convinced her to keep using it as "lots of love."
    I've had this ice cream bar, since I was a child!

    Each thought's completely warped
    I'm like a walkin', talkin', ouija board.
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  4. #94
    climb on Showbread's Avatar
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    Mom: "You should bring Cards Against Humanity home with you at Thanksgiving, I want to learn to play, we could play with your brothers."
    Me: "No."
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*

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  5. #95
    Suave y Fuerte BadOctopus's Avatar
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    Got a new one.

    Me: "What do you want me to bring for Thanksgiving?"
    Mom: "I don't know, what do you want to make?"
    Me: "How about those really good Brussels sprouts?"
    Mom: "Oh, yuck."
    Me: "'Yuck'? If I recall correctly, you had three helpings the last time I made them."
    Mom: "They were delicious. Shut up."
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  6. #96
    climb on Showbread's Avatar
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    I was helping my mom find a book at Powell's City of Books today...

    Me: "I think we want the next aisle over, you're not looking for 'hot lesbian erotica.'"
    Mom: "How do you know? Just because I'm old doesn't mean I'm boring."

    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*

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  7. #97
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    "What are these shoes doing here?"

    My mom to a stranger after mistakenly getting into his car after dinner. My dad was in a similar car waiting for her.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  8. #98
    climb on Showbread's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by five sounds View Post
    "What are these shoes doing here?"

    My mom to a stranger after mistakenly getting into his car after dinner. My dad was in a similar car waiting for her.
    My mom once opened the trunk of a van that looks just like ours and said "I don't remember the car being this messy!" It wasn't our car, and the owners were sitting in the front seat.
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*


  9. #99
    Suave y Fuerte BadOctopus's Avatar
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    I have to share this, because my mom just posted this on Facebook, and it is awesome.

    "Why is music so terrible these days? The AMAs are the worst ever this year. If you can't sing, no worries. We'll just surround you with mostly naked girls, shaking everything they have, and no one will notice that you can't carry a tune in a paper bag. What on God's green earth has happened to modesty and class?"

    I guess I am her daughter, after all.

  10. #100
    Expensive Handbasket Redbone's Avatar
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    Me: "Mama, how would you like ____________?"
    Mama: "I'd like that as much as I'd like cat shit on toast!"
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